[HN Gopher] Chronically lonely flies overeat and lose sleep
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       Chronically lonely flies overeat and lose sleep
        
       Author : gmays
       Score  : 94 points
       Date   : 2021-08-20 17:07 UTC (5 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (www.nature.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (www.nature.com)
        
       | Rd6n6 wrote:
       | Humans look to others as sources of truth and use them for
       | examples to base their behaviour on. If there were no other
       | people around and a person had no emotions at all, their eating
       | and sleeping would become irregular, just like these flies,
       | because there is nobody giving them cues about how to act. This
       | isn't really evidence of depression imho, but does show they have
       | social awareness which is neat and which makes sense
        
         | noman-land wrote:
         | Is there anything particularly bad about irregular sleeping or
         | eating? Maybe it would be better to eat when we are hungry or
         | sleep when we are tired instead of looking to others to decide
         | how to feel.
        
       | xyzwave wrote:
       | > I find it wholesome to be alone the greater part of the time.
       | To be in company, even with the best, is soon wearisome and
       | dissipating. I love to be alone.
       | 
       | and
       | 
       | > Men frequently say to me, "I should think you would feel
       | lonesome down there, and want to be nearer to folks, rainy and
       | snowy days and nights especially." I am tempted to reply to such,
       | --This whole earth which we inhabit is but a point in space. How
       | far apart, think you, dwell the two most distant inhabitants of
       | yonder star, the breadth of whose disk cannot be appreciated by
       | our instruments? Why should I feel lonely? is not our planet in
       | the Milky Way? This which you put seems to me not to be the most
       | important question. What sort of space is that which separates a
       | man from his fellows and makes him solitary? I have found that no
       | exertion of legs can bring two minds much nearer to one another.
       | 
       | Both by Thoreau in Walden.
       | 
       | I do wonder if interaction is a requisite to a happy life. Or if
       | the perception of being a misfit is the true cause of these
       | unhealthy outcomes. For those who are content to be alone, is the
       | need for interaction still as important or can this be offset by
       | a greater comfort with one's self and a deeper connection to all
       | of Nature?
        
         | shrimp_emoji wrote:
         | To reinforce Thoreau's sentiment:
         | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=379oevm2fho&t=5s
         | 
         | What messes with me most is the socially-programmed expectation
         | that I _should_ feel lonely, and that it 's not okay to be
         | isolated (and that it's somehow like smoking 5,000 packs per
         | day or whatever).
         | 
         | It causes me to constantly feel surprised at how okay I seem to
         | be with being alone and like something's wrong with me or I'm
         | not feeling the bad effects yet or something. :D (And the
         | latter is true if you consider the erosion of your
         | relationships as a bad effect, which I do.)
        
       | wombatmobile wrote:
       | If you don't know what flies have got to do with humans, discover
       | Seymour Benzer.
       | 
       | https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2235899/
        
         | dang wrote:
         | That would make a great HN submission sometime! - just not
         | right away (it's always best to give time for the hivemind
         | caches to clear). If you wait a while and submit it, email
         | hn@ycombinator.com and we'll put it in the second-chance pool
         | (https://news.ycombinator.com/pool, explained at
         | https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=26998308), so it will get
         | a random placement on HN's front page.
        
       | the_only_law wrote:
       | Well I certainly lose sleep, but I actually eat less and am not a
       | fly.
        
       | del_operator wrote:
       | Not sure how I read "files overeat and lose sleep" but I was
       | intrigued.
        
       | tpmx wrote:
       | So I googled "the social life of flies" and found:
       | 
       | https://phys.org/news/2018-03-social-life-humble-fruit-revol...
       | 
       |  _Humans aren 't the only species with a well-developed drinking
       | culture. The social life of the humble fruit fly also revolves
       | around alcohol._
       | 
       |  _Their favorite food, rotting fruit, ferments into a beer-
       | strength quaff. Courtship often involves swarming boozy locales
       | and getting frisky after imbibing. Flies also use alcohol as a
       | palliative, taking to drink after repeated sexual rejection. And
       | like humans, flies develop "drinking problems."_
        
         | certeoun wrote:
         | > But even as we wait for the fly to help us combat the complex
         | effects of social isolation, Li and colleagues' study reminds
         | us that there are benefits to everyday interactions with
         | others.
         | 
         | > And like humans, flies develop "drinking problems."
         | 
         | Am I like a fly now? :/ (I observed similar behavior on me with
         | similar circumstances.)
         | 
         | Yeah, I know community is good[1], but I am estranged from
         | family and have 1 friend who is busy with his own life.
         | Possibly it is because of me being weird around people? Or me
         | being socially awkward? I will screen myself for ADHD, but
         | every attempt to connect with people failed. :( I seem to
         | connect with people on platforms like HN, but I cannot connect
         | outside of platforms like HN for some odd reason. Furthermore,
         | I really tried to connect with real people, but I got rejected
         | many times. I am afraid that I am an annoyance to people and
         | that's why they don't want to connect with me.It is stressful
         | to be alone.
         | 
         | Anyhow, I was chronically lonely and still am, and I can
         | confirm the stress reactions that flies experience when they
         | are chronically lonely.
         | 
         | It is stressful to be alone. At least HN gives eases a bit of
         | the stress for me. HN is essentially providing me a venue to
         | connect with people. I am happy about that.
         | 
         | [1] > Harvard study, almost 80 years old, has proved that
         | embracing community helps us live longer, and be happier
         | 
         | https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2017/04/over-nearly-8...
        
           | thoughtstheseus wrote:
           | Welcome to HN! :) thanks for contributing to the community.
        
             | fouc wrote:
             | I assume they're using a throwaway account to make this
             | particular post, since they alluded to making connections
             | on HN before
        
               | nick__m wrote:
               | I would not be so fast to classify him/her/them as a
               | throwaway account, they don't usually post insightful
               | comments like this one:
               | https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=28239106
        
           | elzbardico wrote:
           | Hey man. It gets better as you get older, both because you
           | learn more social stuff, but also because you deal with older
           | and more experienced people that become more tolerant of our
           | differences.
           | 
           | Also some of the skills you get in the online world dealing
           | with people are transferrable to the physical world, well, at
           | least it worked like that for me ;-)
        
             | fouc wrote:
             | Interesting, I assumed the poster was in their 30s or even
             | 40s, but you seem to be assuming they're young instead.
        
               | elzbardico wrote:
               | Yes. It is fascinating how our brains try to fill up the
               | blanks in ways that are probably related to our
               | experience and knowledge.
        
           | the_only_law wrote:
           | I decided to stop going out alone the other weekend thanks to
           | Alcohol. I don't have any sort of chronic issue, but notice
           | if I end up at the bar by myself, I tend to overdo things by
           | a lot.
        
           | sillysaurusx wrote:
           | You sound like you're in your 20s. Even if you're early 30s,
           | life is long.
           | 
           | Listen. I felt similarly to you. Then I was put on Prozac. I
           | stopped having those feelings.
           | 
           | There's a data point. Any time I recommend that data point,
           | people lose their minds. So I'll just state it and leave it
           | up to interpretation. What worked for me won't work for you.
           | (Are you sure?)
           | 
           | My point is, get your ass into the doctor's office. I'm sorry
           | to phrase it bluntly, but if no one told me that bluntly, I
           | never would have. I wrote about it here.
           | https://twitter.com/theshawwn/status/1392213804684038150
           | 
           | The doctor's appointment was _the_ pivotal change in my life.
           | Before doctor, unhappy life. After doctor, happy life.
           | 
           | The problem is, most doctors don't seem to really care deeply
           | about you. Or at least me. I lucked out big time by finding a
           | small sleep clinic with an elderly doc. As I say in the post,
           | she took to me like a mother hen, and she seemed genuinely
           | pained when I expressed the sorts of feelings you're saying
           | here.
           | 
           | Let me put it a different way. You're unhappy with your
           | current trajectory, and you don't see it changing any time
           | soon. I was unhappy with my trajectory, and the only thing
           | that changed it was getting my ass into a doctor's office
           | repeatedly until one of them cared about solving the
           | underlying problem.
           | 
           | In hindsight, there was one other important mental shift.
           | You're not broken. There's nothing "wrong" with you. That
           | would be like saying you're a broken person because you have
           | a broken leg. That makes no sense. And it makes no sense to
           | go through life without taking care of it, or feeling like a
           | crutch makes you less of a person. My crutch was Prozac.
           | Yours will be what works for you.
           | 
           | Good luck. DM me any time, 24/7. Happy to listen about
           | whatever you want to vent about.
        
             | [deleted]
        
         | guerrilla wrote:
         | This gives a whole new meaning to bar fly.
        
         | belter wrote:
         | But of course! All makes sense now:
         | 
         | https://restaurantguru.com/The-Drunken-Fly-Stratford-upon-Av...
        
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       (page generated 2021-08-20 23:00 UTC)