[HN Gopher] Why can't software engineers work from home most of ...
       ___________________________________________________________________
        
       Why can't software engineers work from home most of the time?
       (2016)
        
       Author : LaserDiscMan
       Score  : 74 points
       Date   : 2021-07-26 19:02 UTC (4 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (workplace.stackexchange.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (workplace.stackexchange.com)
        
       | dbrueck wrote:
       | I've been working from home almost completely since 2009 and
       | worked about half time from home since 2005. It's definitely not
       | for everyone, but the only way I'll ever go back to an office is
       | if it's literally the only option left. For me the biggest reason
       | is the staggering amount of wasted time associated with going
       | into the office generally, but specifically for software dev work
       | it's an environment that is stacked against you.
        
       | kube-system wrote:
       | I think all of this stuff is still valid, given the context, and
       | I say that as someone who has been working 100% remote years
       | before COVID.
       | 
       | Jobs are more than just a collection of people working
       | independently. You really need buy-in at all levels of the
       | organization to enable remote work to work optimally. Partially-
       | remote or half-baked remote policies (or rushed, during COVID)
       | often leads to organizational and cultural problems, unrelated to
       | the individual work performance of individuals.
       | 
       | I think if you ask anyone who already worked at a 100% remote
       | organization before COVID, they'll tell you: being already 100%
       | remote was a competitive advantage during COVID.
        
         | flyinglizard wrote:
         | Being a remote organization is an advantage no matter what: it
         | just means that things are more coherent, better documented and
         | more tools are deployed to make an organization that ticks.
         | 
         | Remote vs non remote is kind of like setting up a system from a
         | GUI vs setting it up from a script. One is easier, very ad hoc
         | and doesn't require planning other than intuition; the second
         | requires deliberation but makes for a consistent, flexible and
         | documented procedure.
        
           | kube-system wrote:
           | I think it is an advantage, at least, for businesses which do
           | a type of work which doesn't require physical presence, and
           | hires people who can function productively when remote. I
           | don't think it works well if your organization doesn't do
           | this, and I think it's very difficult to do a mix of remote
           | and in-person (which is what the OP is about)
        
       | G3rn0ti wrote:
       | I actually liked working in the office. But maybe I was lucky
       | having nice colleagues. During the COVID-19 home office year I
       | initially hated working from home. I kind of got used to it over
       | time and it is working better than expected.
       | 
       | However:
       | 
       | 1) I am definitely feel less productive and I find myself getting
       | stressed out easily when something unexpected happens at work
       | (live bugs for example).
       | 
       | 2) I hate teams meetings. I mean the whole microphone/camera not
       | working mess got much better. But I find these meetings less
       | focused and less communicative. Nobody feels obliged to bring a
       | meeting to a productive end (less than ordinarily).
       | 
       | 3) I definitely experience a lack of communication across teams.
       | I have no idea really what my colleagues are doing outside my
       | team. Four to five people quit during the year and, personally, I
       | have no idea what happened making them so dissatisfied.
       | 
       | 4) I gained some weight due to the lack of commute and decreased
       | mobility. During the warmer months I enjoyed my bicycle ride
       | to/fro the office.
       | 
       | 5) The commute also helped me to shut off my thoughts about work
       | issues. Now, I carry them with me all the time and sometimes I
       | return to work at night because I feel the need to finish
       | something. I try to add breaks during the day to distance myself
       | from working at home.
       | 
       | All in all, I don't see why techies are so eager to isolate
       | themselves at home. While my colleagues are certainly not good
       | friends (which I don't have much) but I always enjoyed lunch time
       | with them, chatting with them over a cup of coffee or enjoyed a
       | team event outside the office. Living with and loving my family
       | for many years it feels good from time to time to be a separate
       | person with a separate realm from home.
        
         | TeMPOraL wrote:
         | Interesting. Myself:
         | 
         | 1) I am definitely _more_ productive than in an office, almost
         | by an order of magnitude. That is in a large part because of my
         | specific personality idiosyncrasies (I get anxious in shared
         | working environmens), so it doesn 't generalize.
         | 
         | 2) Meetings I'm in are exactly the opposite - they're much more
         | focused and productive. Probably because everyone has more
         | interesting things to do than waste time on chit-chat over a
         | videocall, so there's this constant pressure to either do
         | something useful, or cancel the meeting.
         | 
         | 3) This one matches my experience too. With no ability to just
         | bump into people or notice they're there, I do feel as if my
         | team is the entire company.
         | 
         | 4) No change.
         | 
         | 5) Sort of the same, except I consider it to be a feature more
         | than a draw.
         | 
         | > _All in all, I don't see why techies are so eager to isolate
         | themselves at home._
         | 
         | To this, the answer is simple: _autonomy_. You get to choose
         | your own environment, your own pace; you can protect your
         | personal space. And, you reclaim the time you wasted on
         | commute, which you get to spend on what _you_ want. In my case,
         | I 'm getting 2 hours of my life back every day. Some people are
         | getting more.
        
         | PragmaticPulp wrote:
         | Your experience matches what I see in offline contexts. I think
         | comment sections online online have a disproportionately large
         | number of people who prefer to get their social activity
         | online. It's natural that people who spend a lot of time on
         | forums, HN, Twitter, and social media would want their
         | workplaces to also go remote.
         | 
         | I take a lot of the remote-work perspective on HN with a grain
         | of salt. It's easy to forget that HN is still a bubble online
         | that doesn't necessarily represent the norms in the real world.
        
       | aequitas wrote:
       | > And not every s/w engineer works in the way described, eg pair
       | programming is hard if one of you is at home.
       | 
       | For me the pair programming experience has only improved with
       | remote working. It's so much easier to share a screen in a remote
       | call than to awkwardly huddle together around a small desk and
       | look at a single 22" monitor or 15" laptop screen. Also it's
       | easier for teammates to chime in into a call or ignore all
       | together which is harder to do in an (open) office space without
       | requiring headphones. Even onboarding new team members went
       | better than I expected.
        
       | Macha wrote:
       | One question, two answers, top one with 7 votes and four
       | comments.
       | 
       | It would be interesting to see how predictions about work from
       | home from pre-pandemic played out, but this isn't a great sample.
        
         | CrazyPyroLinux wrote:
         | And closed as "opinion-based."
        
       | ChrisArchitect wrote:
       | 2016? Something new to add to this? Like maybe the thousand
       | articles written in the past 18 months
        
         | rossdavidh wrote:
         | I think maybe the fact that it was written in 2016, and thus
         | had pre-pandemic answers, is what made it interesting.
        
           | ChrisArchitect wrote:
           | fairplay perhaps, but there's lots of threads pre-pandemic
           | also regarding work from home tips/opinions/pros/cons
        
       | marto1 wrote:
       | There is definitely a lack of trust going on in a lot of places.
       | There is also the question of building relationships. Ask any
       | sales person if he/she thinks warming up a relationship is easier
       | face-to-face or from a distance.
       | 
       | Then there is the fact that not everyone is efficient with WFH.
       | 
       | Finally, if one manages to split his tasks in batches WFH/office
       | hybrid could definitely become an option for many, e.g. work with
       | team in office one week / work on long form client emails
       | remotely. But that's a very big IF.
        
       | timwaagh wrote:
       | Because we're the modern equivalent of a slave. Slaves are always
       | at their masters dwellings. They don't have 'home'. Obviously
       | modern slaves do the same for the most part.
       | 
       | We should count our lucky stars were not required to sleep at
       | work.
        
         | CrazyPyroLinux wrote:
         | This reminds me of "The Tale of the Slave" from "Anarchy,
         | State, and Utopia" https://fee.org/articles/the-tale-of-the-
         | slave/
        
         | black_13 wrote:
         | This is absolutely correct the one thing we own is our time and
         | having us in a contained space means control of the one piece
         | of intrinsic property.
        
         | deanCommie wrote:
         | Except you are extremely well compensated and can quit at any
         | time.
        
           | bialpio wrote:
           | Except sometimes just because you are able to quit doesn't
           | mean you can quit. Hopefully that's less prevalent in IT, but
           | does happen (e.g. people on work visas that cannot change
           | their abusive employer w/o having to GTFO the country).
        
             | TeMPOraL wrote:
             | It's simpler and more common than that.
             | 
             | - Most people don't have significant savings. Even in IT.
             | 
             | - Many people have dependents to support.
             | 
             | - Quitting a job and finding a new one is a big hassle.
             | 
             | - Your chances at finding a comparable job to your previous
             | one are strongly correlated with your performance at your
             | past jobs.
             | 
             | Combined, this means almost no one can _just quit_ ,
             | without putting themselves into immediate, moderate-to-high
             | threat to the lives of themselves and their families.
        
           | timwaagh wrote:
           | Except it's not that way. You can't quit your job except to
           | take another one. They have things like 'real estate market'
           | and 'taxes' to ensure that. You can't quit in the way most
           | people imagine quitting. We need this for the economy to
           | function. Just like the Romans needed slavery for theirs. You
           | are right about the compensation. That part has improved
           | considerably. Still the supposedly appalling thing about
           | slavery wasn't the lack of compensation but the lack of
           | freedom.
        
           | moate wrote:
           | Yea but other than that and your management's inability to
           | sell you to other companies, it's literally the exact same
           | thing /s.
        
         | AutumnCurtain wrote:
         | I worked at a large American healthcare tech giant with a
         | certain Wonka-esque private owner who famously said, when asked
         | why she didn't support adding 'nap rooms' for employees,
         | "That's what your desks are for."
        
         | anarticle wrote:
         | Maybe you should take a walk. No one is shackling you to a six
         | figure salary. Get some perspective.
        
       | motohagiography wrote:
       | A friend and I who have known each other for decades say we
       | manage to stay friends because we only see each other a couple of
       | times a year.
       | 
       | Why burden business relationships with forced several hours /week
       | physical presence and face time when nobody would impose that on
       | a customer or a vendor, and lockdowns have shown that even
       | (especially) marriages aren't designed for people to be stuck
       | together that long.
       | 
       | The only other situation you spend that amount of time with
       | someone is a cellmate in prison, and the inevitable and necessary
       | conseqeunce is micro-power struggles over the least significant
       | things because in spending that much time together, you literally
       | exhaust every other way to relate.
       | 
       | Show me someone who loves office life and being around people who
       | are forced to be together, and I will show you someone with a
       | perverse addiction to confict. When extroversion becomes
       | immoderate, they become masochists who crave attention and
       | interpersonal intensity. As a result, whenever someone tells me
       | they are a "people person," I give them a wide berth because I
       | remember the advice I was given as a young boy which was, "you
       | are what you eat."
       | 
       | I can't imagine re-adapting to something so insane as an office
       | ever again.
        
         | ignoramous wrote:
         | > _I can 't imagine re-adapting to something so insane as an
         | office ever again._
         | 
         | It might be safe to say that one group likes being in the same
         | physical space as their peers [0] and another doesn't, and that
         | both these groups are judging each other for their choice
         | (typical in-group / out-group bias).
         | 
         | > _Why burden business relationships with forced several hours
         | /week physical presence when nobody would impose that on a
         | customer or a vendor, and lockdowns have shown that even
         | (especially) marriages aren't designed for people to be stuck
         | together that long._
         | 
         | See also: Chesterton's fence when advocating for fundamental
         | changes in the way things work [1].
         | 
         | [0] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=7434444
         | 
         | [1] https://fs.blog/2020/03/chestertons-fence/
        
         | blastro wrote:
         | Beautifully expressed post, I just wanted to let you know I
         | appreciate your writing style and what you've written resonates
         | deeply with my experience as well.
        
         | turtlebits wrote:
         | I appreciate your opinion, but you use words like
         | "impose"/"force" and bring up prison.
         | 
         | You have the choice to choose your own employer and if you
         | don't like the terms, the choice to leave.
         | 
         | A lot of people were hired on the condition of going into the
         | office and I find it all the backlash from employees after
         | being asked to go back into the office a bit absurd.
        
           | gravypod wrote:
           | Some light game theory to add to this discussion....
           | 
           | > A lot of people were hired on the condition of going into
           | the office and I find it all the backlash from employees
           | after being asked to go back into the office a bit absurd.
           | 
           | For all of the negative stuff coming from people who do not
           | want to return to an office I find one thing in common: they
           | all usually really like their company and job.
           | 
           | While "If you don't like it, leave" is the reality of the
           | situation it doesn't change that this is somewhat irrational
           | behavior. It is the {CEO, Boss, Manager}'s decision as to who
           | gets to work remote obviously. That's the power dynamic at
           | hand. However, if you think of this in any other situation
           | you can see that there's something about remote work that
           | makes some managers loose their cool. Imagine employees
           | saying this:
           | 
           | 1. I have back pain and if I had an (ergonomic chair|standing
           | desk) I'd be able to work for longer without getting up and
           | walking around. This would make me more productive.
           | 
           | 2. The coffee machine makes bad coffee and everyone walks to
           | the coffee shop across the street 3 times a day. If we just
           | got good grinds and a machine in the office we'd all save
           | money and we'd save ~1hr/day/engineer on context switching
           | for coffee.
           | 
           | A {CEO, Boss, Manager) has _every_ right to say:  "If you
           | don't like your (coffee|desk|chair) then you can leave" but
           | they are obviously acting pretty childish here. If you look
           | at all of these situations logically you're looking for a
           | small input effort for a large continuous return on
           | investment.
           | 
           | If you add into the fact that myself, and many others, think
           | working from home makes us MUCH more productive you can
           | arrive at the following conclusions:
           | 
           | 1. We are not more productive, we just think we are. 2. We
           | _are_ more productive, and we commute less (save money +
           | sanity).
           | 
           | If we think out this decision matrix:                 -
           | Employee + !Productive, Boss + WFH: the employee is no more
           | productive - maybe even slightly less productive - and this
           | comes up in their performance reviews and they're asked to
           | come back to the office. The employee will probably see that
           | WFH does not work for them if this performance review is fair
           | (ex not "You called into the meeting but since you didn't
           | come in person you were obviously not listening as well").
           | - Employee + Productive, Boss + !WFH: The employee can quit
           | and find a WFH company. The employee may be willing to accept
           | *less* money and will produce *more* value for the new
           | employer. This new employer now has a major leg up (in most
           | industries) over the old employer.             - Employee +
           | !Productive, Boss + !WFH: The employee could still jump to
           | another company for less wages at a lower output if WFH means
           | a lot to them.            - Employee + Productive, Boss +
           | WFH: Company gains efficiency for no extra money. Employee is
           | happier.
           | 
           | In this chart we see in every situation except one the
           | employee wins out over the company. In the situations in
           | which the employer allows the employee to try WFH the
           | employer wins out massively: their employee is either happy
           | that they were given a chance or the company has found a way
           | to make someone much more productive.
        
             | turtlebits wrote:
             | The change is just returning to status quo, it's not giving
             | up some right that you already had.
             | 
             | Most companies are asking for partial return to office,
             | which IMO is already a concession, and people are up in
             | arms over it.
             | 
             | I'm not against remote work, I just think people are being
             | too entitled about it.
        
               | gravypod wrote:
               | > I'm not against remote work, I just think people are
               | being too entitled about it.
               | 
               | Does this not personify the relationship with the company
               | a bit here? This is a negotiation. Skilled laborers have
               | the ability to throw their weight around here a bit.
               | 
               | I personally don't think using bargaining power and
               | leverage to ask for more (perks, pay, etc) is
               | entitlement. The employer is allowed to say "no" and the
               | employee is allowed to look for some place else that will
               | say yes.
               | 
               | I think the mental framing that "people are up in arms
               | over it" might be playing a bit into how you envision
               | this working out. Most people I've spoken to have just
               | said something like "I really liked working from home and
               | if my boss asks me to come back I'll look for another
               | job".
        
           | kelnos wrote:
           | > _You have the choice to choose your own employer and if you
           | don 't like the terms, the choice to leave._
           | 
           | That assumes two things:
           | 
           | 1) That a company exists that will grant you your (let's
           | presume reasonable) terms, and
           | 
           | 2) That there are enough companies accepting those terms such
           | that there are enough jobs available for everyone who wants
           | those terms.
           | 
           | My ideal job would be a part-time gig where I get the
           | benefits of a full-time gig (health insurance, 401k, equity,
           | etc.), but can choose my hours (essentially 100% flexibly),
           | perhaps with some sort of weekly minimum, and get paid by the
           | number of hours worked. It would be fully remote, and I could
           | work from wherever I want. But there are very few companies
           | that will agree to terms like that (maybe even _no_
           | companies), even though I 'd be just as (probably more)
           | productive than their "standard" full-time employees.
           | 
           | > _A lot of people were hired on the condition of going into
           | the office and I find it all the backlash from employees
           | after being asked to go back into the office a bit absurd._
           | 
           | It's not absurd, it's people who have traditionally been on
           | the bad end of a power imbalance (employees) finally getting
           | the flexibility they've always wanted, proving that they can
           | be just as productive that way, and then being pissed off
           | that employers are requiring them to go back into the office
           | for little reason other than management's desire to control
           | their employees' lives.
           | 
           | And it's really funny that you find that absurd, because many
           | of them are doing _exactly_ what you claim they should do:
           | leave and find a different employer that will accept their
           | terms. Post-pandemic there are a lot more employers that will
           | accept flexible /remote work arrangements than there were
           | previously, and employers that are requiring employees to
           | come back to the office are going to lose some talent.
        
             | dbrueck wrote:
             | That ideal job can exist, though you may have to create the
             | company yourself (that's what I ended up doing). We were
             | very small (5-7 people) and thought it'd be fun to try out
             | different forms of compensation, so after some
             | experimentation we settled on:
             | 
             | - very healthy hourly rate - min commit of X hours per
             | month (I think it was 80), then work as few or as many as
             | you want beyond that (though for planning purposes we'd
             | often ask people to give us a rough idea of their plans for
             | the next few weeks) - various bonuses that would kick in
             | when the group reached different milestones each month
             | (this was a consulting company, so a lot of them revolved
             | around billable hours) - no additional paid benefits at all
             | 
             | That last one took the most time for people to get on board
             | with initially, but ultimately proved to be really popular.
             | I think it had to do with how entrenched the mindset is
             | around the norm, but concepts like getting paid even though
             | you're not working, or having your employer be involved
             | with your health insurance are pretty odd if you think
             | about it. Things like sick leave, paid time off, etc. are
             | also things that look nice on paper but IMO tend to be a
             | net loss for employees - they tend to be assigned inflated
             | values by the companies and are used as leverage against
             | employees.
        
           | lotsofpulp wrote:
           | That is what is happening. People talking about it with their
           | employers before bouncing is not that surprising, especially
           | in a situation that is in flux.
        
         | Salgat wrote:
         | I think part of it is also that some people create a dependence
         | on forced social interaction to address their own loneliness,
         | instead of developing healthy friendships outside the
         | workplace.
        
           | closeparen wrote:
           | A healthy friendship outside the workplace is maybe 25 hours
           | per month of contact, at the upper end. That's meeting
           | frequently for meals and spending 25-50% of weekends
           | together. If you manage to have 3 of those, that's 75 hours a
           | month of being around other people. Still quite far from the
           | 160 built into an office job.
           | 
           | I don't think friendship is a substitute for the
           | socialization an office provides. A roommate situation might
           | be, but that has other serious challenges.
        
           | iamstupidsimple wrote:
           | Easier said than done in today's world, unfortunately.
        
             | Salgat wrote:
             | While true, that's to blame on COVID, not WFH.
        
               | dublinben wrote:
               | The book Bowling Alone is about this trend of declining
               | social capital and connection in the US, and was
               | published in 2000. This is a modern phenomenon, which
               | transcends any intensification during the last 18 months.
               | 
               | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bowling_Alone
        
               | aksss wrote:
               | COVID makes it worse, but the erosion of participation in
               | structured social groups (fraternal organizations, sports
               | leagues, churches, etc.) has been on the decline for a
               | long, long time. Less participation means less funding
               | means less outreach means even less participation means
               | less groups in total, means less participation, etc.;
               | down and down it goes. Now even the paycheck-compelled
               | participation in the office environment is eroding.
               | 
               | For many people, making new friends as an adult gets
               | harder with age. Part of that is that we're not compelled
               | to join things like we were as children. Part of it is
               | that we have the cumulative time and means to create our
               | own favored environments - my house has some kick-ass
               | stuff in it and air conditioning, so why would I leave
               | it? :D I kid, but kinda not.
               | 
               | As I've gotten older, I've made a point to get more
               | involved in entirely voluntary organizations (collector's
               | groups, church, etc) and it takes work. It's rewarding on
               | the balance - good for my personal growth and good for
               | the group assuming they would agree that I bring a
               | modicum of value to the table - but it takes a dedication
               | that doesn't come easy. Kind of like exercise, right?
               | 
               | An antipattern here is expecting to replicate your
               | quality childhood friendships quickly. Friendships,
               | particularly intimate friendships, take a long time and
               | many shared experiences. 80% of the job is just showing
               | up, so nothing kills budding friendship opportunities
               | like flaking out one too many times. Show up!
        
           | recov wrote:
           | This is something that took me a bit to realize. I've made
           | some friends at work that do things outside of work, but
           | building relationships/friendships outside of work are
           | usually more meaningful and last longer.
        
         | londondev45 wrote:
         | Well said
        
         | OminousWeapons wrote:
         | > Show me someone who loves office life and being around people
         | who are forced to be together, and I will show you someone with
         | a perverse addiction to confict.
         | 
         | I see where you are coming from, but honestly the workplace is
         | one of the rare places someone can easily make friends after
         | 30, precisely because someone is forcing you to be together
         | with other people.
         | 
         | There are obviously other ways to do this (hobbies, etc) but
         | they typically aren't as simple and you're now setting up a
         | second thing you need to participate in. I don't think people
         | love being in the office; they love being with other people
         | instead of being stuck by themselves in their home or quietly
         | sitting by themselves in a coffee shop.
        
         | fossuser wrote:
         | I think good marriages work with the couple in close proximity
         | for extended periods of time.
         | 
         | Many people are in bad relationships. Many married people spend
         | little time together.
        
         | PragmaticPulp wrote:
         | > Show me someone who loves office life and being around people
         | who are forced to be together, and I will show you someone with
         | a perverse addiction to confict.
         | 
         | In my experience, being forced to be a Slack @tag or DM away
         | from coworkers who see you as a screen name rather than a face
         | is far worse for conflict.
         | 
         | Remote work doesn't mean employees get to withdraw from social
         | interaction and isolate themselves. It just moves the
         | interaction to a different medium.
         | 
         | I've managed in-person, mixed, and full-remote teams. Conflict
         | always gets more heated in the remote teams. When you're in the
         | office with someone and talking face to face, people are more
         | likely to treat each other like humans. When you're trying to
         | communicate through emotionless Slack text all day, some people
         | misinterpret harmless comments as being aggressive and struggle
         | to treat their coworkers differently than screen names in an
         | internet flame war.
        
         | BirdieNZ wrote:
         | > Show me someone who loves office life and being around people
         | who are forced to be together, and I will show you someone with
         | a perverse addiction to confict. When extroversion becomes
         | immoderate, they become masochists who crave attention and
         | interpersonal intensity. As a result, whenever someone tells me
         | they are a "people person," I give them a wide berth because I
         | remember the advice I was given as a young boy which was, "you
         | are what you eat."
         | 
         | I'm quite surprised that this is a large part of the top
         | comment. I'm not an extrovert but I love office life, despite
         | its flaws. The primary flaws of office life for me are:
         | 
         | 1. Commute. Currently not a problem but it will be in the
         | future for me. 2. Open plan offices are the norm and make
         | focusing more difficult. 3. Slight more difficulty in eating
         | home-cooked food as if you aren't organised, you end up buying
         | lunch rather than cooking at home.
         | 
         | I don't think I have a perverse addiction to conflict.
         | 
         | Major advantages of working in an office include:
         | 
         | 1. I work more productively usually. The environment helps me
         | focus, rather than goof off. 2. It is much easier to have
         | impromptu coffee and lunch conversations and interesting
         | discussions, both work related and otherwise. This increases
         | team social bonding and speeds up knowledge transfer. 3. The
         | people I work with in the office regularly are easier to relate
         | to and think well of than faces online.
        
         | masterof0 wrote:
         | I know your way of thinking is quite popular here, but I will
         | take my chances anyway. If your friend says that seriously,
         | then friendship is not what you guys have, at least in the
         | traditional sense, I see my friends often, I enjoy seeing them
         | and having conversations, playing, etc... Saying people who are
         | fine talking to other human beings face to face, are craving
         | attention is ridiculous, that's how we have been doing things
         | since the beginning. Also, no one is forced to be together, you
         | can always find a remote gig, or do freelance work or another
         | career altogether. Lots of people love to go to an office an
         | interact with another human beings, you don't need to be
         | extroverted. I do respect your perspective, and I think is
         | totally fine, but trying to associate social people with some
         | sort of masochism is ridiculous. I know , nowadays, being a
         | regular social human , is not as cool as being introverted , or
         | "in the spectrum" (in the spectrum myself), instead of lashing
         | on other people, maybe you can get yourself a more comfy setup
         | and a gig that allows you to not talk to others, and just code
         | your way to the moon.
        
           | Taylor_OD wrote:
           | I think it's equally ridiculous to say that because someone's
           | friendship is not like your, in person face to face
           | interaction, friendship then its not real.
        
             | 411111111111111 wrote:
             | That's why he added that caveat about traditional...
        
             | masterof0 wrote:
             | I didn't say it wasn't real, I said, that in the
             | traditional sense, friends like to meet? you know, be
             | friends? But nice try.
        
               | lsaferite wrote:
               | > then friendship is not what you guys have
               | 
               | That sounds a lot like you are claiming their friendship
               | isn't real to me.
        
         | MaxBarraclough wrote:
         | This reminds me of Penn & Teller's account of making it as a
         | team for decade after decade. They see each other socially only
         | 3 or 4 times a year.
         | 
         | Source: https://youtu.be/rv_Xkz9zepI?t=1259
        
         | feifan wrote:
         | I can't speak to your office environment, but in all the
         | offices I've worked in, I haven't been "forced" to interact
         | with coworkers more than I want to. Being at the office gives
         | me the option to engage in high-bandwidth IRL communication
         | when necessary, and to not interact/ignore other people when
         | I'm busy with something.
        
         | throwawayboise wrote:
         | I think it can be healty to maintain a strict "home is home"
         | and "work is work" separation. Home is then a place of
         | escape/relaxation/recharging where work does not interfere.
         | 
         | Some people can manage that separation with a home office.
         | Others prefer a physically separate workplace.
         | 
         | For me, I didn't think I would like WFH. When forced over the
         | last year, it was better than expected. Certainly not having a
         | commute was nice, not having to "dress up" for work was nice,
         | but both my productivity and the amount of direction on
         | tasks/priorities fell off a cliff. Interruptions were about the
         | same, but when they come from spouse/kids (especially spouse)
         | they are harder to deflect.
        
           | TeMPOraL wrote:
           | > _Home is then a place of escape /relaxation/recharging
           | where work does not interfere._
           | 
           | Or the other way around. That's the rarely stated but
           | arguably common case, particularly for middle-age people:
           | office is a place of escape/relaxation/recharging where your
           | spouse and your little children and/or your inlaws don't
           | interfere.
           | 
           | I love my WFH, I have it worked out with my wife and our
           | family, and I don't want to ever have to work in an office on
           | a regular basis - but I do understand this point. Parenting
           | is hard. Marriage is hard - and COVID in particular threw a
           | lot of people into uncharted territory. Despite all the
           | romantic ideals and the condescending opinions of some
           | people, modern marriage in western world is designed around
           | partners spending significant time apart. Our current
           | pandemic suddenly forced every couple to live a lifestyle
           | most don't experience until retirement. Few were ready for
           | this.
        
           | masterof0 wrote:
           | Exactly, some people can't afford to have a office room, and
           | just shut the doors closed until 5PM.
        
           | [deleted]
        
       | rossdavidh wrote:
       | I would be interested to hear the opinions of anyone who was at
       | Yahoo when they went to remote-friendly, and then went back again
       | (all pre-pandemic). The story heard on the outside was that
       | remote work was not working out, but I never heard the inside
       | story.
       | 
       | I am a contract programmer, and I have worked both in office,
       | remotely, and also hybrid (3/2). I have no strong opinion on the
       | matter. But, I always know I'm temporary, by choice, so the fact
       | that I'm not really making strong connections doesn't bother me,
       | and my loyalty to the company isn't an issue because I'm a "hired
       | gun". Yahoo apparently encountered something they found to be a
       | problem with too many people working remotely, and I'd like to
       | know how it all looked from "ground level".
        
         | 908B64B197 wrote:
         | > I would be interested to hear the opinions of anyone who was
         | at Yahoo when they went to remote-friendly, and then went back
         | again (all pre-pandemic). The story heard on the outside was
         | that remote work was not working out, but I never heard the
         | inside story.
         | 
         | I think Yahoo had much bigger issues to tackle at the time.
        
       | throwaway1777 wrote:
       | Coding by yourself can obviously done anywhere. Working with
       | other people is much faster and easier in person, and arguably
       | the more important part of the job for high level engineers. This
       | is why I think hybrid office/remote is a pretty solid approach.
        
         | flowerlad wrote:
         | > _Working with other people is much faster and easier in
         | person_
         | 
         | Does "in person" mean sitting next to each other? Or can they
         | be in different rooms?
         | 
         | I have seen developers collaborating over Slack even when they
         | are in the same floor in the same building. And if
         | collaborating over Slack works then it doesn't matter if you're
         | in the same building... or even in the same town.
        
         | flyinglizard wrote:
         | I find it much easier to collaborate over Zoom when I have all
         | my screen space and computer to myself. I prefer it so much
         | that I actually changed our company weeklies to be remote-
         | first.
        
           | Taylor_OD wrote:
           | 100%. I was used to only working with other engineers over
           | zoom. I started going into the office and I was shocked when
           | I realized I either had to sit with my laptop on my lap which
           | is inferior to my own set up or just follow along as someone
           | else used their computer which I couldnt see well.
        
       | WhompingWindows wrote:
       | Companies pay you for your output. The notion that they own your
       | attention from 9-5 is ludicrous, right? Even in the office, we
       | won't harass our employees if they close their eyes and meditate
       | or they practice pen-spinning or reciting digits of pi, provided
       | they're getting their job done.
       | 
       | And yet if they're at home, and they want to take breaks to
       | improve their quality of living, this is suddenly a massive trust
       | issue? In the past, commuting, we forced them to take two huge
       | anti-breaks just so we can stare at them and so they can chit-
       | chat with others? I just never agreed with the butts-in-the-
       | cubicle-chair and the value of water-cooler gab.
        
         | PragmaticPulp wrote:
         | > The notion that they own your attention from 9-5 is
         | ludicrous, right?
         | 
         | It's not necessarily about attention, but about availability.
         | Companies shouldn't care if employees take short breaks away
         | from the computer while working remote. However, unless the
         | business truly has perfectly isolated, asynchronous units of
         | work to give everyone, you do need some level of availability
         | to co-work with people and discuss things together.
         | 
         | Most remote companies end up with some core working hours where
         | everyone is expected to be online and available for
         | collaboration. Without this, it becomes a scheduling nightmare
         | to try to get people online to answer questions or collaborate.
        
       | Communitivity wrote:
       | I think there are two main reasons cited by companies. First,
       | protection of IP - they see it as easier to protect Intellectual
       | Property if work is done on site (this is 10x for government
       | contracts). Second, there is a fear that employees are goofing
       | off. I've found I generally work harder remote, to ensure I am
       | visibly being productive. The belief in many managers though is
       | that if you're not 'butt in seat' at the office then they can't
       | look over what you are doing.
       | 
       | I don't think either of these arguments hold water, for the
       | reasons below.
       | 
       | First, with a VPN and modern controls on means of exfiltration
       | you are able to maximize your protection against IP theft as well
       | as to monitor your developers (see second point below though).
       | That said, if a smart thief is going to steal your data, if they
       | have physical access, if they are willing to accept the risk
       | (this places doubt on smarts), and if they put the time and
       | effort in, then they will likely manage to steal something.
       | 
       | Next, trust your people, but verify. Hire the best you can, pay
       | them well so they are happy, and treat them like valued people.
       | When hiring use background investigations, etc. to vet. The more
       | you monitor, the more you say you don't trust them. The more they
       | don't feel trusted, the less happy they'll be. The less happy
       | they are, the more likely they are to leave or worse, commit the
       | theft.
       | 
       | Last, a riff off the previous point. If you get good people,
       | treat them well (incl. help when they have issues), and trust
       | them to do their jobs - most people will perform at their best in
       | a reliable and consistent manner.
        
         | 908B64B197 wrote:
         | > Second, there is a fear that employees are goofing off. I've
         | found I generally work harder remote, to ensure I am visibly
         | being productive. The belief in many managers though is that if
         | you're not 'butt in seat' at the office then they can't look
         | over what you are doing.
         | 
         | It's easy, just look at the pull requests!
         | 
         | If your manager can't look at a PR and figure out what's going
         | on, that's a red flag.
         | 
         | If goofing off is a big concern, you are hiring wrong.
        
         | kelnos wrote:
         | Also on the "trust but verify" bit: you don't have to hire
         | someone new and immediately give them the keys to the kingdom.
         | Gradually build trust, and don't give an employee access to
         | sensitive internal information until they've shown they can be
         | trusted with it.
        
       | chitowneats wrote:
       | "I've recently quit a job that required a 2 hour+ commute (4-5
       | hour total)."
       | 
       | The job did not require that. This individual chose to live in an
       | exurb.
        
         | chrisseaton wrote:
         | How do you know they live in an exurb? Maybe they just live in
         | a town two hours away? Why do they live in that town and work
         | in another? Maybe they have family or social responsibilities
         | that force it - I don't know and neither do you.
        
           | chitowneats wrote:
           | It's absolutely the most likely scenario. I'm making a point.
        
             | chrisseaton wrote:
             | > It's absolutely the most likely scenario.
             | 
             | I don't think so. I know many people who for example wanted
             | to keep their children in the same school so commute for a
             | new job. I don't know anyone who commutes through two hours
             | of suburbs? Where can you even do that? Los Angeles maybe?
             | 
             | > I'm making a point.
             | 
             | Well what is it?
        
         | kilbuz wrote:
         | Or San Francisco.
        
         | aksss wrote:
         | Maybe "I recently quite a job/quality of life balance that
         | necessitated a 2 hour+ commute".
         | 
         | Modifying one of those (ideally the job half) to eliminate that
         | commute is a great choice if available.
        
         | ecshafer wrote:
         | Some other more empathetic reasons:
         | 
         | 1. They live in one city, and received a job in another. 2
         | hours would be Philadelphia to DC or NYC for example. But they
         | can't get a more local job (those don't exist, they can't land
         | them, etc.)
         | 
         | 2. They can't move for some reason. Their partner can't get
         | another job. Their children are in a school and they don't want
         | to move them until they graduate. Their parents are family are
         | nearby and they must be near them, medical issues are possible,
         | elderly, etc.
         | 
         | 3. They just really love where they live
         | 
         | 4. They Can't afford to live.
        
           | deanCommie wrote:
           | 4. is likely not true - software positions at worst are
           | decently middle class.
           | 
           | 3. is an argument against empathy. they made their choice to
           | prioritize where they are living over commute. That's exactly
           | OP's point.
           | 
           | 1. again, if they choose not to relocate then the commute is
           | their responsibility not the job's fault.
           | 
           | 2. is the main point i now have a lot of sympathy for now
           | that I have kids. Kids benefit from continuity and uprooting
           | your whole life for one of the partner's jobs is somewhat
           | selfish.
           | 
           | But even in that situation, I feel like the onus is still on
           | the person - they are choosing their kids over their commute.
           | The commute isn't for the job. The commute is for the kids.
        
             | Jcowell wrote:
             | Hopefully this isn't from delusions but there ARE SE
             | positions with very bad pay especially when what class you
             | eligible for depends on where you live. Software positions
             | at worst can be lower class.
        
             | xjlin0 wrote:
             | 4. is actually true -- in certain SF bay area it probably
             | needs 2 dev salaries to get a house now.
        
               | chitowneats wrote:
               | I fail to see how this is at all relevant to whether or
               | not we should return to in person work. If the Bay Area
               | truly is unlivable, that strikes me as a local political
               | concern. A place with that much wealth surely could have
               | built more housing, infrastructure, etc, but the local
               | population chose not to. Either vote with your feet or
               | live with the consequences of the life you and your
               | neighbors chose.
        
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