[HN Gopher] Tony Hsieh bankrolled his followers, who enabled his...
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       Tony Hsieh bankrolled his followers, who enabled his risky
       lifestyle
        
       Author : stevenj
       Score  : 87 points
       Date   : 2021-03-26 17:02 UTC (6 hours ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (www.wsj.com)
 (TXT) w3m dump (www.wsj.com)
        
       | Drblessing wrote:
       | This is a tragedy and I sympathize with everyone involved. Also,
       | a lesson to not surround yourself with sycophants and drugs. It's
       | easy to blame the sycophants, but Mr. Hsieh would have replaced
       | anyone who tried to help. Imagine you're around and care about
       | him. Is it better to stick around and try to help, as they
       | attempted with the wellness center and doctor, or just leave him
       | to the wolves?
        
         | [deleted]
        
       | d3ntb3ev1l wrote:
       | Billionaire dies partying. Fucks given: zero
        
       | 29athrowaway wrote:
       | Most narcos do the same thing. Escobar was powerful, in part,
       | because he donated millions of dollars for the construction of
       | residential units in Colombia.
        
       | ericskiff wrote:
       | The excerpts from Jewel's letter to Tony are heartbreaking. It
       | seems that she saw where he was headed, the situation he had put
       | himself in, and what was likely to happen as a result.
       | 
       | https://www.forbes.com/sites/angelauyeung/2020/12/04/tony-hs...
        
       | neonate wrote:
       | https://archive.is/I4O0E
        
       | s5300 wrote:
       | The sticky notes of meaningless delusions/motivational words
       | younger grade schoolers may be urged to think and write about how
       | they feel of them seem oddly reminiscent of pictures surrounding
       | Kanye West in recent years. For quite some time, and still, I
       | believe he's going to end up at the center of the next cult
       | shootout we see in the US.
       | 
       | I was lucky to have met Tony twice, having a decent discussion
       | one time. What happened is really unfortunate, and I feel as if
       | we're going to see very similar situations unfold with many of
       | those who are new money making a fortune from tech. I imagine
       | it's got to be unfathomably hard to stay grounded and find
       | meaning after acquiring so much money. All the syncophants in the
       | world will come after you, and as it's been seen with Musk, many
       | others will attempt to bet against any future endeavors of yours
       | just to make a quick buck.
        
       | lookalike74 wrote:
       | When a random addict dies everyone knows whose fault it is. But
       | when a rich addict dies, everyone wants to know whose fault it
       | is. Sure.
        
         | stickfigure wrote:
         | That's unnecessarily cynical. Tony Hsieh was not just some
         | random rich guy, particularly not to this community.
        
       | datavirtue wrote:
       | Is there a non-paywall version anywhere?
        
         | veeti wrote:
         | https://archive.is/I4O0E
        
       | magneticnorth wrote:
       | I appreciate the more nuanced view of the way his entourage both
       | enabled and tried to help him. Earlier coverage (that I saw) just
       | focused on the fact that all his friends were on his payroll and
       | were forbidden from trying to get him to rehab or an
       | intervention. But it sounds like many were trying to help in ways
       | they could come up with that Tony would tolerate - hiring the
       | doctor, for example. And it sounds like his family had started
       | considering a conservatorship, as well.
       | 
       | I'm glad to have the impression that he wasn't surrounded only by
       | sycophants - it sounds like he was a fundamentally good person
       | trying to do good in the world, and it's a more positive thought
       | that many of his friends were trying to meet him where he was and
       | get him back on track, rather than only enabling his downward
       | spiral - though certainly it sounds like there was plenty of
       | that, too.
        
         | hangonhn wrote:
         | A teacher of mine once told us that "The road to hell is paved
         | with good intentions." I think that's one of the paradoxes of
         | life and we see this over and over again where a lot of good
         | people try to do the right thing but the collective effects of
         | their efforts end up being net negative. Rather than
         | conspiracies, I think this paradox can explain some of the
         | challenges we face today. Barbara Tuchman wrote a great book
         | called "The March of Folly" that basically documents some
         | famous cases of people unwittingly working against their own
         | best interest, even if the individual steps themselves might
         | have made sense.
        
       | prionassembly wrote:
       | I didn't know about this.
       | 
       | I can't open the link, but I read
       | https://www.nytimes.com/2021/01/26/technology/tony-hsieh-dea...
       | and the whole thing seems classic untreated bipolar disorder.
       | 
       | I wonder how much of SV shenanigans can be attributed to manic
       | breakdowns. There was already a "hypomanic advantage" meme going
       | around a while ago; and, of course, thinking you can slightly toe
       | the line towards a controled flirt with mania is classical
       | bipolar anosognosia.
       | 
       | PSA: For many years, I self-administered the Young's Mania
       | Ratings Scale everytime I felt the scales begin to tip. It's very
       | short and impressively insightful. You might not know what mania
       | is actually is, and if you live a high-intensity lifestyle you
       | owe it to yourself to take it just once:
       | 
       | https://psychology-tools.com/test/young-mania-rating-scale
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | rchaud wrote:
         | I wonder if this will be the new frontier of bio-hacking:
         | attempting to replicate the symptoms of mania to get a
         | "performance advantage".
        
           | redisman wrote:
           | Is mania a desired state though? It's very chaotic and we
           | already have adderall. I would guess it was more of a
           | facsimile of happiness than a productivity hack. I'm partying
           | all day, my mood is chemically elevated so surely this is
           | what happiness is right?
        
           | Jtsummers wrote:
           | This is one reason some people use some kinds of drugs
           | (particularly uppers of various sorts). They create a
           | temporary manic or hypomanic state, even if that's not the
           | term the users would choose to describe the produced state.
           | Of course, it doesn't always lead to positive or even neutral
           | outcomes especially as many are habit forming and the user
           | can develop a tolerance to it (necessitating more of the drug
           | in order to achieve a comparable effect as before, which
           | exacerbates issues stemming from the side effects and high-
           | dose/long-term use).
           | 
           | Look at college students and knowledge workers using various
           | ADD/ADHD medications, as an example.
        
         | sneak wrote:
         | > _and, of course, thinking you can slightly toe the line
         | towards a controled flirt with mania is classical bipolar
         | anosognosia._
         | 
         | This is one of those amazingly insightful things sort of hiding
         | in plain sight. There is some plain wisdom right here.
        
         | Elof wrote:
         | I've been in tech in the Bay Area for 15 years, mostly in
         | startups, and I can say that untreated mental health issues
         | (myself included for many years) are a very real thing.
        
       | mensetmanusman wrote:
       | US-centric views of love have evolved more towards 'if it feels
       | right, do it'
       | 
       | It feels odd to tell anyone 'no' because people think you are
       | judging them, so most just stay quiet.
       | 
       | In a different culture, Tony may have survived if people felt
       | comfortable questioning dangerous behavior.
        
         | pen2l wrote:
         | It's not contributing much to the discussion to just say "
         | _This._ " but man I really just want to say, indeed as someone
         | who isn't originally from an American culture but now resides
         | in America: the observation you make is profound and so
         | important, and I hope everyone considers this and thinks about
         | this.
         | 
         | Because I know exactly what you're talking about and I'm
         | struggling with this so much, about being supportive of our
         | friends on various decisions they make sometimes even when we
         | don't think deep down it's the right thing in some situations,
         | but we're afraid to say it for an increasing amount of reasons:
         | criticism from woke culture, being afraid of being seen as
         | bossy, party-pooper, disagreeable, puritan. But friends are
         | friends, give them honesty, show them the doubt you feel, tell
         | them your gut feeling. Yeah it'll take some work to make it
         | palatable, but do it, give the hard take that you really
         | should.
        
           | rxhernandez wrote:
           | I don't think this is true. In the circles I run in (which
           | are as nearly as "woke" as you can be), your family and
           | closest friends have carte blanche to tell you you're full of
           | shit.
           | 
           | I know I rely on my family and friends to do so. Conversely,
           | I know I'm able to do so with them and they love me just the
           | same.
           | 
           | I mean, it's a trope at this point in American media where
           | your loved one can slap your face hard to give you a reality
           | check. I've never personally had that happen but to say the
           | culture is a culture of enablers doesn't seem well supported.
        
         | haram_masala wrote:
         | There's a Russian saying, "Your friends are the ones who can
         | tell you 'no.'"
        
           | jfengel wrote:
           | There's an American joke that "Your friend is the one who
           | comes to bail you out of jail. Your best friend is the one
           | next to you in the cell going, "Duuuude, that was
           | AWESOME!!!!"
           | 
           | It's a joke, but the humor exists because it illustrates the
           | idea that the people really like their enablers. Not
           | everybody would find the joke funny, though I have no idea if
           | Americans in general find it funnier than people from other
           | cultures.
        
           | codezero wrote:
           | These truisms tend only to apply to people who are subject to
           | social pressure, a feature that goes away when you are
           | wealthy enough.
        
             | ProAm wrote:
             | People who do not listen to their friends are already dead.
        
         | [deleted]
        
         | goat_whisperer wrote:
         | I don't know if you read the article. But there were people
         | trying to intervene, namely his family, and people calling the
         | police to check in on him. However, the people who were on his
         | payroll made an effort to prevent this stuff, and Tony himself
         | saw any kind of intervention as a kind of betrayal.
         | 
         | So generalizing this example and applying it to US culture is
         | off base.
        
       | Leary wrote:
       | "Among the many friends the entrepreneur made over his life, some
       | said the cause of his death had spanned many months, in plain
       | sight to those who surrounded him. Last summer, his Park City
       | companions hired an on-call doctor. Unless Mr. Hsieh moderated
       | his drug and alcohol use, the doctor said, he would die within
       | six months."
       | 
       | It's one thing to overly indulge a billionaire friend, it's
       | another to endanger his physical/mental well being to the point
       | of death.
        
         | rchaud wrote:
         | You cannot forcibly make someone go to rehab. People are quick
         | to blame his 'friends', but it appears that they hired a
         | personal doctor, who gave doctorly advice. What more could they
         | do?
        
           | omginternets wrote:
           | I've often wondered about this, in the abstract.
           | 
           | What if the reason someone isn't motivated to get better is
           | precisely because of the acute drug dependency? In other
           | words, what if getting someone through the initial withdrawal
           | of, say, heroin stabilized them enough to feel motivated to
           | improve their lives?
           | 
           | After all, we use this reasoning to prescribe medication for
           | e.g. anxiety and depression. The reasoning is that drugs are
           | sometimes very good at providing people with just enough
           | stability to allow for long-term solutions like therapy.
           | 
           | If this is indeed the case, might there not be some
           | situations in which forcibly taking someone to rehab would be
           | helpful?
           | 
           | The "you cannot forcibly make someone go to rehab" seems like
           | policy more than actual truth. It may even be a good policy,
           | for all I know. But assuming I'm right, maybe we shouldn't
           | confuse the two.
        
           | caycep wrote:
           | In geriatric medicine, there is a somewhat defined, albeit
           | difficult, process of declaring someone medically incompetent
           | to manage their own affairs; they usually are committed to
           | specialized (memory care) facilities. In some cases, the
           | symptoms and rationale are clearly obvious. In others...these
           | patients can be vulnerable to less scrupulous individuals.
           | 
           | For a wealthy high functioning billionaire, but one who is
           | arguably affected by dopamine dysregulation that compromises
           | his faculties, I'd imagine it's a trickier path to walk...
        
             | rchaud wrote:
             | The press have already painted his friends as opportunistic
             | hangers-on. Imagine how it would have looked if they
             | actually started making moves to take on power of attorney.
        
               | caycep wrote:
               | yeah...that's what seems to make it especially tricky.
               | There would have to be a good lawyer involved, and I'm
               | not sure how they would find a trusted third party to be
               | the conservator...
        
           | nickelcitymario wrote:
           | I kinda agree. It's entirely possible that they were being
           | callous and greedy, but from what I've read, it sounds like
           | they made every effort short of getting fired. Now, maybe
           | they should have all worked together and risked him declaring
           | them all disloyal, but it's not like they didn't try.
           | 
           | Plus, if I had a close friend who was doing mushrooms and
           | nitrous oxide, I wouldn't necessarily think that was
           | particularly dangerous. I, perhaps ignorantly, would have
           | considered those to be relatively safe things to experiment
           | with.
           | 
           | It's so easy to say what should have been done after the
           | fact, but it can be incredibly difficult to know the right
           | thing in the moment.
        
             | Drblessing wrote:
             | +1, anyone that was telling him the truth gets removed, so
             | what are they supposed to do? Looks like they tried with
             | the wellness center and doctor. It's more grey than black
             | and white.
        
         | sneak wrote:
         | Our lives and bodies are our own, to use, build, and destroy as
         | we see fit.
         | 
         | It's one thing to help a friend avoid an accidental death, but
         | this speaks to a months long pattern of behavior that was
         | clearly a deliberate personal decision.
         | 
         | What's the point of wealth if not obtaining the basic freedom
         | to live (and die) how we choose?
        
           | omgwtfbbq wrote:
           | >a months long pattern of behavior that was clearly a
           | deliberate personal decision
           | 
           | Drug/Alcohol addiction is hardly a personal decision... This
           | is a dangerous point of view to take.
        
             | sneak wrote:
             | Whose decision is it, if not the person who opts to become
             | addicted and continue that addiction?
             | 
             | People like to personify addiction, as if there is some
             | outside force controlling the person, but this is to
             | discount and discard every single addict who decided to
             | clean themselves up. I know lots of addicts who chose to
             | continue, and I know lots of addicts who chose to stop.
             | 
             | Don't personify the addiction: the brain of an addict is
             | still _that person 's brain_, and their decisions are still
             | their own, even if they are de-legitimized in your own
             | opinion due to their addiction. There is literally no one
             | else who could possibly be responsible for the decisions of
             | that human's brain and actions than that human being.
             | 
             | What goes in to our own bodies when we are not coerced by
             | another person is our own decision, full stop.
        
         | onetimemanytime wrote:
         | Ultimately everyone makes his own decisions, especially someone
         | with essentially unlimited funds. We can go through the moves
         | and end at the same conclusion.
        
       | colmvp wrote:
       | Within minutes of his death breaking the news, someone in the
       | comment posted on HN about this enablement. I had skepticism but
       | it also felt way too specific and out of nowhere for me to think
       | they were lying. It was heartbreaking to eventually realize it
       | was indeed the truth.
        
         | neonate wrote:
         | Do you mean https://news.ycombinator.com/threads?id=exzappos?
        
           | colmvp wrote:
           | Yup, precisely.
        
         | reaperducer wrote:
         | It's what I call the Michael Jackson Effect.
         | 
         | Someone surrounds themselves with people who are financially
         | dependent on them, so they only tell them that they're great,
         | and whatever they do is the best thing that has ever happened.
         | The unchecked praise-money feedback loop eventually leads to
         | the host's destruction.
         | 
         | See also: Silicon Valley.
        
       | Animats wrote:
       | In the end, he's just another dead junkie. At least he didn't
       | take anyone else with him.
        
         | ksm1717 wrote:
         | Congrats! Pure evil take!
        
         | lenitabinol wrote:
         | What's the point in disparaging the dead.
        
           | Animats wrote:
           | To discourage adoration and emulation.
        
       | viklove wrote:
       | Whip-its? This guy had $840M and his drug of choice was whip-its?
       | That is strangely amusing...
        
         | ng12 wrote:
         | Whip-its have become pretty popular among the burning man
         | crowd. I remember seeing piles in East Palo Alto parking lots
         | and wondering if they were from bored kids or bored techies.
        
           | waterfowl wrote:
           | maybe the implication is that it is surprising he would be
           | cracking whipped cream chargers vs. using his billionaire
           | concierge connections to get a tank(crooked dentist,
           | whatever).
           | 
           | Would look classier than 10000 little chargers in piles --
           | nitrous addicts can consume a staggering quantity of little
           | pods, basically back to back constantly every 15 seconds for
           | hours. It is reportedly very 'moreish', as the brits would
           | say.
        
             | AlanYx wrote:
             | Previous articles about his death mentioned that he also
             | had portable nitrous tanks that he'd use on walks outdoors
             | in Park City and in other situations where he couldn't go
             | through individual whip-its. His being tethered to the tank
             | was one of the things that motivated Jewel to write the
             | letter.
        
       | throwaway5752 wrote:
       | With all due respect (and not saying these groups have overlap)
       | there is a notable presence of people on Hacker News that
       | minimize the danger of or encourage drug experimentation, if not
       | regular drug use.
       | 
       | Tony Hsieh is ultimately responsible for his choices that led to
       | his tragic and early death. But it leaves a bad taste to see
       | people calling out his entourage here and then other people
       | advocating similar behavior in other submissions.
        
         | sneak wrote:
         | > _With all due respect (and not saying these groups have
         | overlap) there is a notable presence of people on Hacker News
         | that minimize the danger of or encourage drug experimentation,
         | if not regular drug use._
         | 
         | I think a better way of describing it is a continuum of belief
         | around drugs. Most people aren't talking about caffeine or
         | alcohol when they say "drug use" but those are indeed
         | psychoactive drugs as well.
         | 
         | "All drugs are wrong, but some are useful." is perhaps a useful
         | model for thinking about it? (Not that I think drugs are wrong,
         | just that nothing, and I mean nothing, in life is without cost
         | in a cost/benefit analysis.)
         | 
         | All substances we ingest, from distilled water, to table salt,
         | to a cup of coffee, broccoli, a beer, a cheeseburger, morphine,
         | or methamphetamine have various effects, long term and short,
         | on our bodies, and we should understand those effects as best
         | we can before we ingest any of them.
         | 
         | I've seen ketamine save people's lives, and I've seen it
         | destroy people's lives. Same with firearms. Sharp tools are a
         | good thing, on balance, in my opinion, but should be wielded
         | with knowledge and understanding in order to be safe.
        
       | jamesgreenleaf wrote:
       | One simple and obvious lesson to point out here is that you
       | better make peace with yourself before coming into possession of
       | any large sum.
       | 
       | Money can destroy you just as easily as it can empower you. Look
       | at what happens to a significant percentage of lottery winners.
       | 
       | It's an amplifier, and it can amplify your problems and self-
       | destructive tendencies along with your desire to do good.
        
         | Barrin92 wrote:
         | Young athletes seems to be another really big case of this.
         | Lots of people with short careers but huge earnings who either
         | cannot handle the money or hand their finances over to people
         | who try to take advantage of them.
        
       | recursivedoubts wrote:
       | "In a sort of ghastly simplicity we remove the organ and demand
       | the function. We make men without chests and expect of them
       | virtue and enterprise. We laugh at honour and are shocked to find
       | traitors in our midst. We castrate and bid the geldings be
       | fruitful."
        
         | airhead969 wrote:
         | C.S. Lewis, Abolition of Man.
         | 
         | It's the epitome of unreasonable expectations: a self-
         | fulfilling prophecy by setup. "Yes men" are terrible,
         | especially if they're there to mooch rather than question or be
         | more than good weather "friends."
        
       | jzellis wrote:
       | I worked for one of the startups Tony funded in Vegas and was
       | around for most of the Downtown Project stuff, and was also one
       | of the most vocal critics of what happened there. This story
       | covers just the tip of the iceberg.
       | 
       | I'm really sorry he died, even though I was horrified by the
       | externalities of what he did in my town and, frankly, didn't much
       | like the cat personally. But this idea that all of this started
       | when he went to Park City is just not true. The culture of heavy
       | boozing and drugs was very much always a big factor in the Vegas
       | downtown tech scene. I don't think that statement would be
       | considered controversial by anyone who was around for the real
       | surge of it, from about 2010 - 2014 or so. And look, I'm not a
       | Puritan or an abstainer, but it's hard to take people seriously
       | when most of the meetings seem to be done whole day drinking at
       | the casino or by the pool in the Ogden condo.
       | 
       | Whatever. It's all over with now. I didn't even know Tony had
       | left town - he'd stopped really making the scene outside his
       | trailer park long before that. I wish he'd had people who could
       | help him, but he spent a long time being told that he was an
       | instinctual visionary whose every act was an act of genius. That
       | isn't very good for honest self-evaluation.
       | 
       | I wish everything had happened differently, but it didn't. It's a
       | shame.
        
         | sadgrip wrote:
         | Hey I'm from Vegas as well and I have a friend getting his MFA
         | working on a story on the Downtown Project and it seems like
         | he's coming to a lot of the conclusions you've come to. If it's
         | possible I'd love to get you in touch with him to talk about
         | your experience a bit.
        
       | ethanbond wrote:
       | > Ms. Baleson helped spearhead plans for a wellness center at the
       | Ranch, hoping to pull Mr. Hsieh out of his spiral. The plans were
       | canceled in September after a disagreement in the group over who
       | should get a commission for the project.
       | 
       | Sheesh... this really sums it up. Tragic.
        
       | goat_whisperer wrote:
       | Anyone else get a sense that something similar is happening with
       | Elon Musk? Guy seems to be unraveling
        
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       (page generated 2021-03-26 23:03 UTC)