[HN Gopher] Elements of Dance Etiquette (2005)
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       Elements of Dance Etiquette (2005)
        
       Author : Tomte
       Score  : 43 points
       Date   : 2021-03-11 13:22 UTC (1 days ago)
        
 (HTM) web link (www.utdallas.edu)
 (TXT) w3m dump (www.utdallas.edu)
        
       | bruiseralmighty wrote:
       | Pretty good write-up. I did a lot of social dancing in my last
       | two years of college and for several after that.
       | 
       | This document sets up a pretty good standard baseline that would
       | only be tweaked going from scene to scene.
        
       | benjwrdill wrote:
       | In the lindy hop community, there has been a very strong pushback
       | on the "don't say no to a dance" sentiment that was inherited
       | from ballroom communities and is advocated in the featured
       | article.
       | 
       | There's some tension there between making the scene inclusive and
       | keeping people comfortable. I do think it's important to
       | encourage people to dance with newcomers, but there's also the
       | fact that it is -work- to dance with a newbie. I'm still forming
       | my thoughts on the matter but currently I encourage all the
       | leaders of my (admittedly small) scene to dance with newcomers
       | when they have the energy to do so.
        
         | potatochup wrote:
         | Yup! The West Coast Swing community went though the same thing
         | fairly recently. E.g. "No is a complete sentence". The social
         | dance scene has traditionally been a place where unsavory
         | behavior can go undetected/unchallenged, due to the social
         | pressure of not being rude.
         | 
         | Even if you don't have unsavory characters, many people
         | unintentionally tie their self-validation to getting accepted
         | for dances on the dance floor, which can create a lot of angst.
         | Managing expectations is a huge part of introducing people to
         | social dance, since it's so different to the outside world.
        
         | Bluestein wrote:
         | Would never have looked at it that way, but, indeed, it is work
         | ...
        
         | at_a_remove wrote:
         | The best dancer I have laid eyes on in my entire life was at a
         | goth club. This guy was so good he actually made his partners
         | look like they knew what they were doing, flawlessly adapting
         | to their little mistakes. It was astonishing. You would see
         | them with someone else and they were a mess, but this guy just
         | ... blended everything without a seam. It took effort not to
         | gawp at this guy because you rarely get to see someone who is a
         | complete master at something in the wild. I've been to ballet
         | and he made most of the performers I have seen on stage look
         | like palsied bears by comparison. How much work and energy does
         | it take to get to _that_ level?
         | 
         | It's a bit like how impressive the dance scene is in _Ex
         | Machina_ (from a Watsonian, not Doylist, perspective): you
         | realize that this gynoid is capable of watching this guy out of
         | the corner of its eye and matching his every doubtlessly
         | unplanned mildly inebriated move, as Nathan is probably a guy
         | who leads when he dances, not follows.
        
         | Tomte wrote:
         | Years ago I read a blog post that I found good: it recommended
         | that advanced dancers ask new dancers (especially one who are
         | there for the first time) within the first hour of the dance.
         | 
         | After that they can focus on partners on their own level.
         | 
         | (Obviously you can't make that mandatory - it's a voluntary
         | thing you decide for yourself)
         | 
         | The newbies are less hesitant when they don't know yet that
         | their dance partner is very good. They have a good time. And
         | when they see their dance partner from earlier do really cool
         | and advanced moves they feel that the scene is welcoming ("such
         | a good dancer actually asked me to dance").
        
           | benjwrdill wrote:
           | I agree! It's important for advanced dancers to ask newcomers
           | to dance for all of these reasons. I also acknowledge that
           | dancing with a beginner can be difficult and at times
           | dangerous if they are overenthusiastic or have unsafe
           | technique, and not all advanced dancers have the energy to
           | meet that in a safe way.
        
       | ThrustVectoring wrote:
       | > Gentlemen: if you have no place to leave your keys and loose
       | change, carry them in the _left_ pocket of your trousers. This
       | makes it less likely to bruise your partner.
       | 
       | For those with less context into social dancing, this is because
       | the typical default "stance" is offset to avoid stepping on each
       | other's feet - each partner's _right_ foot is roughly aligned
       | with their partner 's midline.
        
         | virtualritz wrote:
         | > For those with less context into social dancing, this is
         | because the typical default "stance" is offset to avoid
         | stepping on each other's feet - each partner's right foot is
         | roughly aligned with their partner's midline.
         | 
         | I presume that is in ballroom.
         | 
         | For Latin, Tango and Swing which are all mentioned: Simply not
         | true. Your hips are so far apart that it doesn't matter.
         | 
         | That being said: you ideally have a key/change pocket in your
         | pants. Or even better, a beltline interior pocket. The latter
         | is where I keep my keys when dancing tango. On the right side
         | btw. You can't tell from the outside.
         | 
         | These pockets are sadly not available in off-the-shelf clothing
         | any more since maybe around the 1940's.
         | 
         | The reason is twofold: you won't feel your keys/change as much
         | and from the outside you wont have anything ruining your leg's
         | silhouette. Left or right. :-P
        
           | ThrustVectoring wrote:
           | Yeah the offset is used for "closed position" in ballroom,
           | though my personal exposure is through vernacular social
           | dances that borrow dance vocabulary from proper ballroom
           | dances.
        
           | balfirevic wrote:
           | > For Latin, Tango and Swing which are all mentioned: Simply
           | not true.
           | 
           | It absolutely can be true for Argentine Tango, depending on
           | the style of embrace.
        
           | _nothing wrote:
           | I'm not sure which Latin dances you're thinking of but I can
           | think of a bunch of instances in salsa where objects in my
           | right pocket would get in the way. _Definitely_ in bachata,
           | and kizomba if one considers that a Latin dance.
           | 
           | Also depends on what "Swing" you're referring to, but even in
           | Lindy Hop I would say I my right hip is close to my partner
           | frequently enough that this would be an issue, in partnered
           | Charleston and various Shags there is regular side-by-side
           | connection (connected on the right side for the lead), and
           | Balboa is danced in an offset close embrace position where
           | your hips, while not necessarily in direct contact, will
           | often brush against each other simply due to proximity.
        
           | torarnv wrote:
           | > For Latin, Tango and Swing which are all mentioned: Simply
           | not true. Your hips are so far apart that it doesn't matter.
           | 
           | Offset stance, and closed position, is used in many swing
           | dances, for example Lindy Hop and Balboa, so your statement
           | is simply not true ;)
        
           | Tomte wrote:
           | > For Latin, Tango and Swing which are all mentioned: Simply
           | not true. Your hips are so far apart that it doesn't matter.
           | 
           | Many Swing dances (and including the most popular one, Lindy
           | Hop) have a closed position.
           | 
           | In Balboa you're generally so close that there is contact at
           | least from the side of the hips to the side of the chest, in
           | more advanced levels often extended up to the cheeks.
        
       | mellosouls wrote:
       | Nice article, though mostly aimed at partner dancing.
       | 
       | For solo dancing (e.g. in some clubs where a dance-targeted event
       | is happening) there is at times a frustrating lack of awareness
       | as the boozers wander round aimlessly, "dancing" ironically and
       | obliviously spilling drinks and banging into people who are there
       | to actually, you know, _dance_.
       | 
       | I'm not talking about nights where its a bog-standard drunken
       | meat-market and obviously its up to the event organisers to set
       | the parameters for the night, but part of the reason for the
       | decline of dance culture in some parts of the world (e.g. the UK)
       | is a contempt for dancers, and priority given to packing them in.
       | 
       | Those non-partner-dance events where dance culture and etiquette
       | is still respected are incredibly rare.
        
       | Bluestein wrote:
       | > Exercising common sense and social skills is always a good
       | idea. If someone is sitting closely with their significant other,
       | whispering sweet nothings to each other, then it is probably not
       | a good time to ask either of them for a dance. Now a different
       | scenario: your intended partner is cornered by a bore and being
       | lectured on weather patterns in lower Namibia. You can advance
       | and stand close. Once your intended partner makes eye contact
       | with you, smile and say: ``Dance?'' Usually, that is enough to do
       | the job. If not, it is better to leave him/her to learn about
       | weather patterns in lower Namibia.
       | 
       | I love this :)                 (And by "this", I also mean the
       | whole article. It is great ...)
        
       | virtualritz wrote:
       | > Milongas: (Argentine Tango) For both ladies and gentlemen,
       | black or dark themes are preferred.
       | 
       | As someone who has been dancing tango for a decade, around the
       | globe, including lots in Argentina, I can only say that this pure
       | and utter BS.
       | 
       | EDIT: After reading the rest of this: it seems to be written from
       | the perspective of a ballroom dancer.
       | 
       | Just for example, in tango you never walk up to a person and
       | verbally ask for a dance. It's an absolute no-no. Contract is
       | negotiated by eye contact/face only. Only exceptions are people
       | that you know to like dancing with you already and who stand
       | right next to you.
       | 
       | Same with declining. A no is a no. No weird requirement to offer
       | a different dance later; to 'compensate'.
        
         | Sharlin wrote:
         | Not sure about ballroom culture, but the article is 100% spot
         | on for swing dances at the very least.
        
       | [deleted]
        
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