https://kleinbottle.com/#AMAZON%20BRAND%20HIJACKING Glass Klein Bottles for sale - inquire within / ras4 +--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------+ |Need a zero-volume bottle? | | | | | |Searching for a one-sided surface? | | | |Klein Bottle | |Want the ultimate in non-orientability? | | | | | | Get an ACME KLEIN BOTTLE!| | +--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------+ .Seven Klein Bottles in a Row! At last, Acme Klein Bottle has conquered topological and engineering frontiers to manufacture genuine glass Klein bottles. These are the finest closed, non-orientable, boundary-free manifolds sold anywhere in our three spatial dimensions. These elegant bottles make splendid gifts, outstanding classroom displays, and inferior mouse-traps. With its circle of singularities, an Acme Klein bottle can be said to exist inside of itself -- especially handy during time-reversals. A mathematician's delight, handcrafted in glass ... from your Zero Volume Klein bottle distributor -- Wednesday morning 30 June. Thank you to all my friends from Hacker News -- serious thanks! Amazon may have taken notice; at least they have removed my Amazon listing (and all 200 positive reviews). This may (or may not) be a good thing. Meanwhile, I'm swamped with a tsunami of over two dozen orders. I'll try to send them all out today, but I suspect that I won't be able to send out tomorrow. Again: THANK YOU. -Cliff CORONA VIRUS: I've ordered everyone at Acme Klein Bottle to work from home. Of course, I'm Acme's only employee, and this is my home business. Which is to say: Yes, I will send out your Klein bottle within 24 hours. Usually within two hours. As I pack your Klein bottle, I squirt the glassware with 95% ethyl alcohol, which oughta zap any lurking Covids (as well as my fingerprints). -Cliff * Acme's Klein bottles (same day shipping) + Classical Glass Klein bottles o Baby $43 o Medium /out/ o Big /out/ + Tiny Klein bottles $28 (free shipping) + Klein bottle Earrings $50 (free shipping) + Klein Stein $93 + Klein bottle Hat & Mobius Scarf $50 (free shipping) + Wine bottle Klein bottle - $117 +----------------------------------+ + Spirals - Helix Kleinbots $155 |[hatbackviewlittle] | + Sliced bottles -see the inner Mobius Loops |----------------------------------| + Double & Triple Klein bottle $250 / $350 |Stylish Klein Bottle Hat & Mobuis | + Very Big Klein bottles $600 to $6000 |Scarf! | + GIANT Klein Bottles $18,000 +----------------------------------+ * Acme's bargain basement bottles: +---------------------------------+ + Cutting Edge Jigsaw Puzzles |Drinking Mug Klein Bottle | * Exclusive features of your Acme Manifold |---------------------------------| * Calibrations? You bet! |Quench your thirst from a Klein | * OK, so what's a Klein Bottle? |Stein | * Cartoons, limericks, poems, haiku +---------------------------------+ * What's in stock, Specs, & Warnings +------------------------------------+ * Acme Klein Bottle's Unconditional Guarantee |[IMG_8008] | * How to order - PayPal or Credit card |------------------------------------| * A baker's dozen one-sided Bottles? |Wine Bottle - Klein Bottle | * Several ways to display your Acme Manifold +------------------------------------+ * Meet us at these Conferences * Portraits of Gauss $45 (a few left) * Acme's FAQ (boring) * How to fill, dry, and clean your Klein Bottle * My Klein Bottle Advertisment? * Jobs open at Acme * Let us PROVE what we can do for you * See Felix Klein's Original Klein Bottle! * How we make a glass Klein bottle > > > Shopping Cart Checkout Special -- I will write a custom message on your glass Klein bottle using a Sharpie pen (or, if you wish, sign my name on it). No charge for this -- just mention it at checkout. I'm running low on glass Klein bottles: There's a shortage of borosilicate glass tubing, resulting in depleted stock. If you see a Klein bottle on my website, then I have at least five on my shelf, and you can order it. If it says "out of stock" then please wait until late summer. I hope that everything will be back in stock by September (I hope!). Thanks for your patience. At last - I've made the Acme Wine Bottle Klein Bottle - it's now in stock! Self-siphoning Cup of Tantalus and a Topless Teapot Polyhedron Posters! Plenty of Polyhedra NEW -- IMPROVED! EVERY ACME KLEIN BOTTLE NOW COMES PRE-EQUIPPED WITH A GENUINE RIEMANNIAN METRIC! GUARANTEED! *CERTIFIED BY A REAL UNDERGRADUATE MATH MAJOR* An Acme Klein bottle is a perfect gift for a mathematician, computer scientist, or troglodyte. In Germany, it's called a Kleinsche Flasche. A Klein Bottle makes a great math gift and an ideal present for a mathematician! Origami Klein Bottles? Yep! Also, check out my Klein Bottle Slicing Machine We made the world's largest glass Klein bottle for the Kingbridge Centre! Cliff Stoll with giant Klein Bottle Answer to my most commonly asked questions: 1) Yes, I am Cliff Stoll, and I make and sell Klein bottles. My business is named Acme Klein Bottle. 2) Yes, I regularly send these to countries around the world. (As of 2021 mid-February several countries are unreachable by post: South Africa, Philipines, India and all of South America) 3) Yes, you can safely order from this website, and I will send your Klein bottle within 24 hours. 4) Yes, I pack each one very securely to survive the post; I guarantee safe, speedy delivery. 5) If you are unhappy with your Klein bottle, I will refund your money. 6) If this is a gift, I'll print "Happy Birthday" (or whatever you want) on the packing slip or the outside of the package. If you wish, I'll write your message on the bottle with a Sharpie pen. 7) No, I no longer do the hot glass work - I contract this out to professional glassblowing shops. I do everything else myself - from design to packing to writing the html on this website, with occasional help from my son Danny, my daughter Zoe, and my wife Pat. 8) Yes, you are welcome to visit if you are traveling to Northern California (San Francisco/Oakland/Berkeley) Call first - 510 654 3958 9) No, I cannot engrave these glass Klein bottles. The borosilicate glass laughs at laser beams and the compound curves defy X-Y tables.. 10) Yes, there are many math jokes on this website, but despite that, I really do sell Klein bottles 11) Yes, my son Danny and I designed each of these bottles ourselves. Our designs are copyright (c) by Cliff Stoll 12) My website looks old-fashioned because it loads faster this way and (mainly) I'm too lazy to rewrite it. I last updated this page June 26th, 2021 13) Yes, that's me in the [ video / book / talk / college / bowling alley ] -Cliff Stoll in Oakland (two blocks from Berkeley, 10 km east of San Francisco, and epsilon away from some boundary) ARE YOU A STUDENT, AGE 12 TO 17? Do you like the kind of math humor that's on this website? Then consider one of the terrific summer math camps! Several that come to mind: the Hampshire Summer Studies in Math (in Amherst, Massachusetts during July & August... learn why the Yellow Pig endorses 17 varieties of Acme Klein bottles -- hcssim.org ). Also, the MathILy program at Bryn Mawr (five weeks of maximum mathematical marvelousness) (www.mathily.org). I've also heard great things about Epsilon Camp in Utah (well, one of the Epsilon camp counselors visited, and she really impressed me!) There are dozens more camps-- see a list of these camps at www.ams.org/programs/ students/emp-mathcamps ... feel free to ask me for opinions or comments about these various math camps. Also -- Math Circles are springing up around the world ... find out if there's one in your neighborhood: www.mathcircles.org/ Wiki_ExistingMathCirclePrograms_view COMMITTED TO TRANSPARENCY! International and transgalactic organizations require transparency and openness-- Acme is proud to offer FULLY TRANSPARENT Klein bottles that are OPEN and VISIBLE. We certify that NOTHING IS HIDDEN INSIDE YOUR ACME KLEIN BOTTLE! In response to almost two requests, I've uploaded my IMPERFECTO RULER Our "M&M's in a Klein bottle Contest" is closed When you order from this website, your should immediately receive an automated confirmation from my system. When I actually pack your Klein bottle, I will compose a non-automated email, with the return address of kleinbottle [email protected] kleinbottle ddoatatdot com. That second email will have a tracking number in it, as well as a link to photos of the package that I'm sending to you. If you don't see that second email within a day of ordering, please check your spam/junk mail folder. And if you still don't see that email from me, please send me a note and I'll figure out what's worng. My email troubles: I receive huge amounts of spam. I never send out any spam. If you write to me, I may not see your email unless you include the phrase "klein bottle" in the subject. My replies to your may end up in your spam folder, so please include my address in your list of Permitted Senders. HOW TO GET EMAIL TO CLIFF: Send me email - KLEINBOTTLE aa ttt KLEINBOTTLE (ddoott] COM Important: to get through layers of my spam filters, please include the two words "Klein Bottle" in the subject of your email and also in the body of your text. Please use plain text without html. Email with subjects like "Hello Cliff"or "Do you ship to Nigeria?"or "Good Day" or "HI"will be delayed until I look at my spam folder. HOW TO RECEIVE EMAIL FROM CLIFF: Iif you purchase anything from me, or write to me, please add kleinbottle aa ttt kleinbottle (ddooott) com to your Permitted Senders. This is especially important if you use gmail, hotmail, yahoo, or AOL. Much of my email to these mailboxes gets blocked as spam, which annoys me greatly, especially when I spend half an hour composing an email and it winds up in the gutter. Acme Klein Bottle -- by Cliff Stoll, (and Pat, Zoey, & Danny Stoll) 6270 Colby St., Oakland, California, 94618 USA phone +1 510 654 3958 We are a family business, operating from our home. You're welcome to stop by for coffee & chat - please call ahead if you plan to visit. ** * * UPCOMING TRAVEL: * * ** When I'm home, I send out Klein bottles as I receive orders - within 24 hours, and often within the hour. When I'm away, I send out all Klein bottles when I return. Here's my travel schedule: 2020 May 6 to 11th -- Along with glassblower Lucas Clarke, I'll be at the Cornell Topology Festival Come see hot glass turn into a Klein bottle! <- Meeting cancelled because the continuum hypothesis cannot be proven within Z-F set theory. Acme Klein Bottle - where yesterday's future is here today! AMAZON BRAND HIJACKING: 2021-June-22 -- A foreign seller has hijacked my Amazon Klein bottle listing to advertise their cheezy "black head remover". Please order *only* from this website, www.kleinbottle.com. If you have doubts, call me on the phone: 510 654 3958. This website, and only this website, is run by me, Cliff Stoll. It's bizarre - Amazon rebranded my Amazon listing as "Amvoom". Worse, I'm unable to remove the listing from Amazon! It's called "Brand Hijacking". Short summary: A sleezy company hijacked my Amazon listing to move my positive reviews over to their product. Details: First, although I've sold Klein bottles for 25 years, I have never trademarked my business name, "Acme Klein Bottle". It's called a "common-law trademark". For the past 5 years, I've had a listing on Amazon, where I sold only large Klein bottles, This listing received 199 five-star reviews and 2 four-star reviews. No bad reviews at all. (I'm honored, of course). My Amazon customers are mainly parents who buy Klein bottles for their kids around the holidays. Well, sometime in May, Amazon seller "Amvoom", from Shenzen China, trademarked the word "Amvoom". On June 22nd, they used Amazon's Brand Registry to re-brand my listing on Amazon (replacing my brand, "Acme Klein Bottle" with "Amvoom") They could do this because Amazon's Brand Registry only respects issued trademarks. In essence, they told Amazon the they owned the Klein bottle listing. In turn, they are now in charge of that Klein bottle listing on Amazon. So instead of "Handmade Klein Bottle", Amazon now lists "AMVOOM Handmade Klein Bottle". Amvoom does not sell Klein bottles. Likely, they don't know what one is. Instead, they redirected my 199 reviews to their product (a black-head remover). They did so by adding a second "color option" for their black-head remover, which was just a pointer to my Amazon Klein bottle listing. In turn, all my reviews show up on their black-head remover. The ordinary color of their item costs $12. The oddball color shows a photo of a Klein bottle and costs $75. All the reviews are combined on their black-head remover listing, so both "colors" have five-star reviews. Their main listing shows fiver-star reviews. But if you read their reviews, you'll see the black-head device has lots of reviews talking about Klein bottles and mathematics. To make their blackhead remover listing look legit, Amvoom then submitted several hundred orders over Amazon, and immediately cancelled each order. These depleted my Klein bottle inventory on Amazon - even though nothing was paid for, and nothing was shipped. In turn, this removed the "second color option" for their blackhead-remover, since Amazon felt that the Klein bottles were out of stock. Result: their black-head remover listing got 199 positive reviews, and the Klein bottle did not show up as a "color choice" in the Amvoom black-head listing. After 2 days, the "Amazon Prime Days" sale ended, and Amvoom stopped linking to their product. However, they still "own" my listing. Most likely Amvoom sells (or rents) my reviews to some other Amazon seller. These are professionals who manipulate Amazon reviews -- they sell their services (and my reviews) to disreputable Amazon sellers. For example the Amazon seller who listed the Amvoom black-head remover is "TaroRee", located in Fujian China. As a byproduct of Amvoom's shenanagans, I am unable to edit my Amazon listing or to sell my Klein bottles on Amazon. There is no way to appeal this to Amazon - the Amazon Brand Registry does not accept email (only a website pull-down menu which advertises how wonderful they are, and how to apply for the benefits of Brand Registry). My complaints to Amazon seller support have been ignored. If you know someone who works at Amazon Brand Registry, please tell me. Or better yet, please tell them of the headaches this has caused. Thanks for your understanding! -Cliff Stoll Saturday morning June 26, in Oakland, California. And yes, I am now trademarking Acme Klein Bottle. --- note added Saturday afternoon, June 26: right now the Amvoom black head remover, sold by TaroRee, has lots of positive reviews, many talking about a wonderful "Cooker Grill Heating Element". Hmmm - I wonder why? // further notes, added Tuesday evening 29 June (um, almost Wednesdasy morning // // quicklky written by Cliff and not yet edited, in response to questions on Hacker News... // More about this trademark: A trademark is specific to a product or group of products. For example, the word "United" is trademarked for United Airlines, but there's also United Concrete and United Sodas. Shenzhen Hangteng Information Technology Co in Shenzhen, China, has trademarked the word "Amvoom" for specific goods of " Sphygmomanometers; Abdominal corsets; Acupressure pillows; Breast pumps; Cervical collars; Commode chairs; Corsets for therapeutic use; Ear thermometers; Finger splints; Heart rate monitoring apparatus; Heart rate monitors; Human face protectors, namely, transparent face shields for use in the medical and dental fields; Lasers for the cosmetic treatment of the face, skin, hair follicles; Massage apparatus; Massage apparatus for eyes; Massaging apparatus for personal use; Medical devices, namely, pulse oximeters; Medical isolation gowns; Protective face masks for medical use; Respiratory masks for medical purposes; Sanitary masks for medical wellness purposes; UV lamps for medical applications" Notice that Amvoom's trademark does not cover goods such as Klein bottles or mathematical shapes. Indeed, they do not have a valid trademark for "Blackhead remover" Yet Amazon recognizes their trademark. Amazon, through its "Brand Registry" allows anyone with an issued trademark to take over any brand, whether or not the brand is covered by the specific goods that the trademark was issued for. Brand Name Hijacking takes advantage of several bugs in Amazon's seller business model: 1) Amazon Brand Name Registry allows the owner of a USPTO trademark to take over listings of non-trademarked brands. 2) Amazon Brand Name Registry fails to limit a registered Amazon brand from over-reaching beyond the regulated goods and services associated with that trademark. 3) Amazon combines reviews of different item variations and colors, even though they are from completely different listings and manufacturers. 4) Amazon debits inventory even when an order is cancelled, allowing a denial of service attack to exhaust inventory in a seller's listing, at no cost to the attacker. Effects of Brand Hijacking: 1) Shoddy or unproven products receive five-star reviews, apparently dating across several years. 2) Consumers, relying on Amazon star ratings, are grossly misled by the summary reviews. 3) Disreputable sellers are rewarded (at the cost of honest sellers) by large volume sales caused by high ratings. 4) Unscrupulous sellers of reviews receive money from Amazon sellers in return for inflated reviews. 5) Independent sellers on Amazon -- specifically those who deliver high customer satisfaction over many years -- are locked out of their listings and pushed out of their business. Seeking a topological solution to the global financial crisis? Help the world economy by purchasing an Acme Klein bottle! Custom Topological Manifolds. Industrial and post-industrial consulting. Free Range Kleinbots Mathematical gifts ... a Perfect Gift for a Mathematician ... Klein's Bottle in Glass ... DESIGNS SO EXCLUSIVE THAT THEY ARE NOT TO BE FOUND EVEN IN FAMOUS MUSEUMS! Now with a LIFETIME GUARANTEE - we guarantee that you will live your entire life OR YOUR MONEY BACK!. This page, the entire website, and the bottle designs are Copyright (c) 1995 to 2021 by Cliff Stoll TOP OF PAGE