There was also another Inconvenience resulting from long Life. Those who had unhappily lost their Estate or Fortunes, those who were maim’d in their Limbs, or were fallen into incurable Diseases, made the most piercing Complaints, and knowing no End to their Miseries, often laid violent Hands on themselves. The Shortness of Life, therefore, is to the Wretched the best of Remedies. Both these Countries afforded me Matter of much Admiration, and upon my Departure fill’d me with very philosophical Reflexions.

I pursued my Journey thro’ certain desert and rocky Places, which lead to Spalank, or the Country of Innocence. This Place is so call’d from the Innocence and peaceful Humour of the Natives. These are all Beeches, and esteem’d the happiest of the whole Creation. They are subject to no Passions and Affections, and consequently free from all Vices.

Upon my Arrival, I found all I had heard was true, and that actually they were govern’d not by Laws, but by their own innate Virtue and Disposition. Envy, Anger, Hatred, Pride, Vain-Glory, Discord, and all which among Mankind bears the Name of Vice, is here proscrib’d and banish’d. But with the Vices there were also many Things wanting, which adorn the human Species, and seem to distinguish them from Brutes. Except Divinity, Natural Philosophy and Astronomy, all the Arts and Sciences were wholly unknown. They had not the least Idea of Law, Politicks, History, Ethicks, and Eloquence, the very Names of which were never heard of. As there was not the least Spark of Envy, so there was no Emulation to excite and animate the Soul to worthy Deeds. There were no splendid Edifices, no Palace, no Senate-House, no Forum, no Magistrate, no Riches, and consequently no Desire of them, or Contention about them. In two Words, if they had no Vices, they had no Politeness, Art, or Elegance; nor any of those Things, which, tho’ in Reality no Virtues, are yet extremely like Virtues, and render Men civiliz’d and social. To say the Truth, I seem’d here to be rather in a Forest of real Trees, than in a rational Society. I stood a long Time in doubt what Judgment to form of these People, and whether such a State were in Reality desirable. At length reflecting, that an uncultivated Creature was however better than a vicious Creature, and that tho’ they had no Arts, they had also no Thefts, Murders, and other atrocious Crimes, which destroy both Body and Soul, I could not help pronouncing them happy. Walking carelesly along one Day, while I was among them, I struck my left Leg against a Stone. It swell’d violently, and gave me excessive Pain. An honest Countryman seeing this Accident, presently ran to me, and with a certain Herb he held in his Hand and apply’d to the Wound, the Anguish forthwith abated, and the Swelling decreas’d. These People, thought I, must have extraordinary Skill in the Art of Healing. Nor was my Conjecture wrong. For since their Studies were confin’d within so narrow a Compass, they were not contented with the outward Rind of Knowledge, like our modern Connoiseurs, but went to the Bottom of Things. When I thank’d my Benefactor for his Services, and told him that God would be his Reward, he answer’d me in so solid, so learned, and so devout a Manner, tho’ in Terms perfectly simple and rural, that I had really some Apprehensions it was an Angel in the Shape of a Tree. It appears hence, with what little Reason we dislike that calm Philosophy of some Men, who neither wish nor grieve, are neither angry, nor pleas’d, who divest themselves of all the impetuous Passions of the Soul, and whom we therefore accuse of leading a Life of Indolence and Softness. It appears also how much mistaken they are, who are Advocates for the Necessity of Vices among Men; who stile Anger the Whetstone of Courage, Emulation the Spur of Industry, and Distrust the Parent of Discretion. For who does not know, that from ill Eggs ill Birds are hatch’d, and that many Virtues which Mortals pride themselves in, and which are celebrated in Verse, are rather the Disgrace than Ornament of Humanity, if beheld with a philosophical Eye.

I left this Place, and arriv’d at Kiliac, where the Inhabitants are born with certain Marks impress’d upon their Forehead, signifying the exact Number of Years they have to live. These surely I thought must be the most fortunate People under the Sun, since an unexpected Death could surprize none of them in a sinful Action. But then, as their last Day of Life was known to every one, they deferr’d their Repentance to the last; insomuch that if you found one among them sincerely devout and honest, it was one whom the Marks upon his Forehead directed to think of his Quietus. Some I observ’d who walk’d with their Heads hanging down; they had almost liv’d out their Time, and were counting the Remainder of their Days and Hours upon their Fingers, expecting with Horror their last approaching Moment. This gave me to see the general Wisdom of the Creator in concealing from Mortals the Time of their Death.

Having travell’d over this Country, I came to a Streight, the Water of which was black; and being ferry’d over, I landed upon the Province of Askarac. Here new Monsters met my Eyes. As Cabac produces Animals without a Head, some among these People are born with seven Heads. To these, as being possess’d of an amazing Knowledge, the Citizens formerly paid almost divine Honours; and out of their Tribes alone, Commanders, Consuls, Senators, and other great Officers were elected. But, alas! as many Heads as they had, so many different Geniuses they had. They confidently and readily undertook to discharge various Employments at one and the same Time; and left nothing unattempted while they held the Reins of Power: But from that Multiplicity of Business, and from their various Ideas interfering and jostling with each other, they made wretched Work of it; and in Process of Time so great was the Confusion, that it requir’d the Labour of an Age to recover from the Disorder these omniscient Magistrates had thrown Things into. Hence a Law was enacted, to exclude for ever these seven-headed Trees from all publick Offices of Importance, and that the Government should hereafter be intrusted to simple Heads, that is to say, those who have only one Head. Ever since, those very People, who had been rever’d as Gods, have been sinking into the same Contempt as the headless Inhabitants of Cabac. For as they, who had no Head at all, could do nothing; so these with many Heads did every Thing perversely. But tho’ they are for ever remov’d from all State-Trusts, yet they serve as an Ornament to the Kingdom. They are carry’d about like publick Spectacles, to shew the World how liberal Nature has been in their Formation. Tho’ to say the Truth, had she been less lavish of her Favours, she had been in Reality much kinder. Of all this Race, there were only three in my Time in Employment, to which, however, they were not admitted, till they had consented to an Amputation of six of their Heads. After this, the confus’d Ideas they labour’d under vanish’d, and they were brought to common Sense. Thus Men prune Trees of their superfluous Branches, to derive more Health and Vigour to the rest. Very few undergo this Operation, upon Account of the extreme Pain and Danger. From hence I drew this useful Maxim, That all Excess is hurtful, and that Simplicity is true Wisdom.

From hence I pass’d to the Principality of Bostanki, a People, as to their outward Make, little different from the Potuans; but as to the inward, they have this Singularity, that their Heart is situated in their Thigh; so that it may be truly said of them, that they carry their Heart in their Breeches. Hence, among all the Inhabitants of this Globe, these are accounted the most fearful and pusillanimous. Upon my Arrival, I enter’d into an Inn near the Gate, and as the Fatigue of Travelling had made me something weary and fretful, I rattled my Host for being slow in his Attendance. But he, falling on his Knees, implor’d for Mercy, and extending his Thigh for me to feel the great Palpitation of Heart he was in, from storming I fell to laughing, and bid him dry his Tears, and cast away all Fear: He rose, and in a Transport kiss’d my Hand, and set about Supper immediately. In a Minute or two the whole Kitchen resounded with Cries and Lamentations. I ran thither, and to my vast Astonishment, there did I behold my very fearful Host beating and whipping his Wife and the Maids about. Seeing me, he took to his Heels, and run away. I turn’d to the weeping Family, and begg’d to know what Crime they had committed, to provoke so meek a Man to so great Rage. They, on the other Hand, stood mute, with their Eyes fasten’d to the Ground, not daring to tell the Cause of their Affliction. But upon my persisting to enquire, and adding Threats to my Intreaty, the Mistress spoke to me in this Manner: “You seem, Sir, to be a great Stranger to the Manners of the World. The Natives of this Principality can’t bear the Sight of an armed Enemy, and out of their own Houses tremble at the least Noise; yet they all domineer in the Kitchen, they exert their Bravery on their defenceless Family, and are only then valiant, when no Resistance can be made. On this Account they are the Jest, as well as the Prey, of the neighbouring States. But in the bordering Kingdom, to which we are Tributaries, the Case is otherwise. There they never fight but against an arm’d Enemy. There the Males command abroad, and serve at home.” I admir’d the Wisdom of the Hostess, whom I look’d upon as worthy of a better Condition. And, indeed, upon a closer Inspection into the Nature and Disposition of People, this Matron, it must be own’d, was extremely in the right, since from innumerable Examples it is clear, that Hercules is not the only one who has yielded to a Distaff, but that it is the common Fate of brave and warlike Men to submit, with all due Patience, to the Female Yoke: And that, on the other Hand, the veriest Cowards in all Nature, who like the Bostankians, carry their Hearts in their Breeches, are yet Heroes in the Kitchen. This People live under the Protection of a neighbouring Kingdom, to whom they pay Tribute for it.

From hence I pass’d by Water to Mikolac. Coming out of the Boat I miss’d my Cloak-Bag. I presently charg’d the Boat-Man with the Theft, who stifly deny’d it. Upon this I went and complain’d to the Magistrate, telling him, that if I had not the Liberty of bringing an Action against the Boat-Man for Breach of Trust or Theft, I hop’d he would at least compel him to make simple Restitution. But my Adversary not only persisted in denying the Fact, but threaten’d me with an Action of Slander. In a Case so doubtful the Court call’d for Witnesses. But as I could bring none, I desir’d my Antagonist might purge himself by Oath. At this the Judge smil’d, and spoke as follows. “My Friend, says he, in this Province we are bound by no Religion, nor have we any other Gods beside the Laws of our Country. Accusations here must be made good by legal Methods, such as proving the Delivery, estimating the Value, exhibiting Receipts, and producing Witnesses. Whoever is destitute of these, not only loses his Cause, but is liable to be sued for Calumny. Make the Case plain by proper Evidence, and what you have lost shall be restor’d to you.” Thus losing my Cause for want of Witnesses, I not only lamented my own Misfortune, but that of the Republick itself. For from hence it appear’d, what a weak unsettled Society that must be which depends for its Security upon human Laws alone, and how frail are all political Edifices unless cemented together by Religion. I staid three Days here in continual Fears. For tho’ the Laws of the Country are in Reality very good, and tho’ Crimes are punish’d with the utmost Severity, yet no Safety can be reasonably expected in a Country too atheistical to have the least Sense of religious Obligation, and where they scruple the Commission of no Crimes, provided they can but conceal them.

From this Land of Atheists, I travell’d on over a steep Mountain to the City of Bracmat, which was situated in the Plain at the Foot of the Mountain. The Inhabitants are Junipers. The first Person I met, came directly rushing at me, and threw me backwards. I did not well understand this, and asking the Reason of it, the Juniper begg’d my Pardon a thousand Times. Presently after, another with a Staff he had in his Hand, gave me a Blow upon the Reins that almost took away my Senses: But in the same Moment he made a long Harangue to me in Excuse of his Imprudence. Suspecting, therefore, this People to be either totally blind, or very weak-sighted, I took Care to avoid every one I met. In fact, all this arose from the exquisite Sense of Sight which some are here endued with. They can clearly discern remote Objects, which are impenetrable to vulgar Eyes; but then they do not see what is nearer and almost at hand. These are call’d Makatti; and they devote themselves principally to the Studies of Metaphysicks and Astronomy. They are of very little Service in the World, by reason of their too delicate Vision. They make very pretty minute Philosophers; but in solid Matters and Things of daily Use, they commit innumerable Blunders. However, the Government makes some Use of them, and sends them to the Mines for the Discovery of Metals. For tho’ they see scarce any Thing upon the Surface of the Earth, their Sight exerts itself upon any Thing beneath it. I concluded from hence, that there are some who are blind from too great a Delicacy in the Organs of Vision, and that they would see better if their Eyes were worse.

Having gain’d the Top of another very steep and rocky Mountain, I now enter’d the Province of Mutak, the Capital of which look’d like a Grove of Willows, the Inhabitants being all of that Species. Proceeding to the Market, I there found a robust, healthy young Man, sitting in a Place of Ease (of which there are many round the Market-Place) and imploring the Mercy of the Senate. I enquir’d the Meaning of this, and was informed, that the said Person was a Criminal, to whom they were going to give the fifteenth Dose. Surpriz’d at the Answer, I step’d aside, and desir’d my Host to explain this Riddle. He reply’d thus: “Most Nations punish Crimes by whipping, branding, hanging and the like: But nothing of that Kind obtains in this Country. For we study not so much to punish Crimes, as to mend the Criminal. The Culprit upon the Seat is a wretched Author, who for his violent Itch of Writing, which neither Law nor Advice could restrain, has been condemn’d by the Senate to the publick Punishment. This is left to the Censors of the City, who are all Doctors of Physick, and who are now going to macerate and bring him low by frequent Purgings, till they have conquer’d and extinguish’d the Lust of Scribbling.” He ended his Discourse with desiring me to go to the Shop of a publick Apothecary. I went with him accordingly, and to my vast Amazement beheld Phials and Gallipots all properly arrang’d, with such Inscriptions as these: Powder of Avarice. Pills for Lust. Tincture against Cruelty. Lenitive of Ambition. Cortex against Pleasure, &c. Words cannot express the strange Confusion of Mind this odd Spectacle threw me into. But a perfect Ecstasy of Surprize ensued, when I observed a Parcel of Manuscripts with these Titles: Sermons of Master Pisagus, a Morning’s Perusal of which gives six Stools. Meditations of Dr. Jukes, a Specific in the Coma Vigil, or Want of Sleep, &c. I thought the People out of their Senses, and to examine more accurately the Virtue of their Medicines, I open’d the first of these Books. It was such insipid Stuff, that at the first Chapter I began to make Faces; and reading on, I found my Bowels rumble, and soon after had a Tenesmus. But as I knew I had no Occasion for Purging, I threw the Book down, and run away. I then observ’d, that nothing in the whole World was without its Use, and that the most pitiful Performances were serviceable for something. I found also, that this People were no Fools, however absurd I at first took them to be. My Host averr’d to me, that he was cur’d of lying awake from only perusing Doctor Juke’s Book, the Virtue of which was so profound and potent, that Vigilance itself must snore at it. These Things occasion’d in me a tumultuous Variety of Thought. And lest they should break in upon that Chain of philosophical Reflexions I had heretofore made, I resolv’d soon to leave the Country. And happily enough, the strange Things I soon saw in other Provinces, jostled out almost all Thoughts of this Place. But notwithstanding, after I had finish’d my Tour round this Globe, and was reflecting upon the Mutakian Philosophy, their Manner of curing Disorders was not altogether so absurd. For I am convinc’d, that in our Europe there are some Books that would purge the most costive, or give Sleep to the most wakeful. As to the Disorders of the Mind, I own I could not subscribe to the Mutakian Principles in this Point, tho’ it must be confess’d, there are some Infirmities of Body, which we confound with the Disorders of the Mind; as a witty Poet of our World has observ’d in the following Epigram.

I departed from Mutak, and crossing over a Lake of a yellow Hue, I arriv’d at Mikrok, and proceeding to the capital City, I found the Gate shut. I was oblig’d to wait till the drowsy Centinel was pleas’d to open it, which was some considerable Time, it being secur’d with a Multitude of Locks, Bolts, and Bars. Entring, I observ’d a deep Silence reign throughout the whole City, except that my Ears were now and then assaulted by a Noise as of People snoring. I could not help fancying I was got into the Region of Sleep, as the Poets talk. Would to God, says I to myself, that several of the Magistrates, Senators, and a few other honest Countrymen of mine, who are dear Lovers of Peace, had had the Luck to be born in this blessed City! How sweetly and quietly would they live! And yet from the Signs in the Streets, and Inscriptions on the Houses, it was evident, that Arts and Sciences were not unknown here, and that Laws were exercis’d. Led by these Signs, I found out an Inn. No Entrance to be had. The Doors were all fast. And tho’ it was Noon with the rest of the World, it should seem it was Night to the Inhabitants of this City. At last, after having knock’d and bounc’d a long while, I was let in. Time is here divided into twenty-three Hours; nineteen of them are sacred to Sleep, the other four to Business. Suspecting, therefore, these People to be monstrously negligent both in their publick and private Affairs, I desir’d something to be brought me to eat, which they had ready in the House, fearing, if I had order’d any Thing to be dress’d, the Cook should fall asleep while it was about. But all Things are here done in the concisest and most compendious Manner; every Thing superfluous is omitted; and therefore this diminutive Day of theirs is long enough for all Sorts of Business. After Dinner, which was brought upon Table with a surprizing Expedition, my Host waited on me round the City. We went into a Temple, where we heard a Discourse, short indeed, with respect to the Time, but long enough considering its Importance. The Preacher went directly to his Subject. He us’d no Flourishes, no Tautologies, nor said one superfluous Thing. So that when I compare this Discourse with the long nauseous ones of Master Petre, the former is in Reality more copious than the latter. With the same Brevity Proceedings in Law are dispatch’d: The Advocates say all in few Words, and then produce their Witnesses. I remember to have seen a Copy of a Treaty of Alliance between this and a neighbouring Kingdom. It was couch’d in these Terms: Let there be perpetual Friendship between the Mikrekians and Splendikanians. Let the Limits of the two Kingdoms be the River Klimac, and the Top of Mount Zabor. Sign’d, &c. Thus in three Lines they express, what with us would require a Volume. Hence I am persuaded one may come to the Point with less Noise and less Loss of Time, if Superfluities were to be retrench’d; as a Traveller would find his Journey half as short again, were he always to go directly strait. The Natives here are Cypresses, and are distinguish’d from other Trees by Wens in their Forehead, which Wens have a stated Increase and Decrease. When they increase, a certain Humour distils from them, which falling upon the Eyes brings on a Drowsiness, and is an Indication of the approaching Night.

From hence to Makrok is one Day’s Journey. Here the Inhabitants never sleep. Entring into the City, I stopp’d a Person, tho’ he seem’d to be in Haste, and begg’d he would be pleas’d to direct me to a good Inn. He reply’d he was very busy, and made the best of his Way forward. So great was the general Hurry of this Place, that they seem’d not to walk thro’ the Streets, but to run or fly, as if they were afraid of being too late. The least I could think was, that some Part of the City was on Fire, or that some other sudden and unlook’d for Disaster had frighted the Citizens out of their Senses. At last I cast my Eyes upon a Sign before a House, which signify’d it was an Inn. Here some were entring, others departing, others stumbling for Haste, insomuch that I was a Quarter of an Hour bustling in the Yard before I could gain Admittance. In a Moment I was ask’d a Multitude of impertinent Questions. One said, Where do you come from? Where are you going to? How long do you stay here? Another said, Will you dine alone, or with Company? If the latter, what Room will you dine in, the red, the green, the white, or the black Room? Or will you dine above Stairs, or below? with a thousand Impertinences of this Kind. My Host, who was a Clerk of one of the inferior Courts of Justice here, went away to Dinner, but soon return’d, and then gave me a long tedious Account of a Law-Suit that had been depending these ten Years, the Hearing of which was now coming on before the fourteenth Court. He told me, he hop’d it would be ended within two Years, since there were but two Courts remaining, beyond which there was no Appeal. He left me in great Astonishment, and convinc’d me, that this Nation was extremely busy in doing nothing. When my Landlord was gone, I walk’d about the House, and by Chance dropt upon a Library. It was large and well stock’d, with respect to the Number of Books, but a very indifferent one with respect to the Contents. Among those Books, which to Appearance were in best Condition, I observ’d the following,

My Landlord, at his Return to me, entertain’d me with a Description of the State of the City; and from what he said, I concluded that more Business was transacted by the sleepy Mikrokians, than by the waking Makrokians; that these play’d with the Shell, while the other eat the Kernel. The People here too are all Cypresses, and as to the outward Make of their Bodies, differ very little from the Mikrokians, excepting the Wens upon their Foreheads. They have not the same Blood or Juice in their Bodies which other Trees of this Globe have, but instead of Blood, they have a thicker Juice in their Veins, which is of a mercurial Quality and Appearance. Nay some think it is Quicksilver itself, inasmuch as in a Barometer it is found to have the same Effect.

At the Distance of about two Days Journey from hence lies the Republick of Siklok, which is divided into two Societies, in Alliance with each other, but govern’d by different and opposite Laws. The first is call’d Miho, founded by Mihac, a famous Lawgiver of old, and the Lycurgus of the Subterraneans. In order to render his Republick stronger and more lasting, he made sumptuary Laws, which forbid all Luxury on the severest Penalties. And accordingly this Society, for its great Continence and Parsimony, may be justly call’d another Sparta. One Thing I wonder’d at, and that was, that in a Government so well constituted, and which piqu’d itself upon the Excellence of its Laws, there should be so many Beggars. For wherever I turn’d my Eyes, there was a Tree begging an Alms, which is a very troublesome Thing to Travellers. Upon a nice Inspection into the State of the Republick, I was convinc’d, that these Miseries flow’d from the too great Œconomy of the People. For all Luxury being proscrib’d, and the Rich baulking their Genius, and giving into no Indulgences, the common People of course must lead an indolent, idle, and beggarly Life, for want of Matter to make a proper Gain of. I concluded from hence, that rigid Parsimony in a State produces the same Inconveniences as an Obstruction of the Blood in a human Body. In the other Province, that of Liho, they live splendidly and jovially, and spare no Expence. Here Arts and Professions flourish; the People are encourag’d to Industry, and every Citizen has an Opportunity to raise a Fortune. Whoever is poor among them may fairly impute it to his own Negligence. Thus the Profusion of the Rich gives Life to the Body politick, as the Circulation of the Blood in the human Body gives Strength and Vigour to the Limbs.

The Territory of Lama borders upon this. Here is the celebrated School of Physicians. With so much Ardour is the Study of Physick here pursued, that none are look’d upon as genuine Doctors, unless they come from the illustrious School of Lama. And hence this City is crouded with so many Doctors, that you see more of them than of all other Sorts of People put together. Whole Streets are fill’d with Shops of Apothecaries, and anatomical Instrument-Makers. Loitering about the City, I met a Tree offering to Sale the Bills of Mortality for the Year last past. I bought one of them, and to my great Surprize found the Births and Burials stand thus: Born fifty; buried six hundred. I could not conceive that in a Place, where Apollo himself seem’d to have fix’d his Residence, there should be such a yearly Havock among the Citizens. I ask’d the Tree what unusual Plague or Pestilence had rag’d in the City the last Year. He reply’d, that two Years ago the Number of the Deceas’d was greater, that this was the common Proportion between the Births and Burials, and that the Inhabitants of Lama were perpetually afflicted with Distempers, which hasten’d their Deaths; insomuch that in a short Time the City would be empty, if it were not supplied and recruited from the neighbouring Provinces. Upon this I hurry’d out of the City, not thinking it prudent to stay longer here, especially as the Name of a Physician, and the Sight of the anatomical Instruments, after what I had suffer’d in the Country of Philosophers, could not be very agreeable. Therefore leaving this Place, I never stopt, till I came to a Town four Miles distant, where the People live without Physicians, and without Diseases. In the Space of two Days, I arriv’d at the Land of Liberty. The People here are accountable to no Authority. They consist of separate Families, without being subject to any Laws or Power whatsoever. Yet an Appearance of Society is preserv’d, and in publick Matters they consult the Seniors, who perpetually exhort them to Peace and Unanimity, and admonish them never to depart from that primary Precept of Nature, of doing to others, as you would be done by. On all the Gates of the Cities and Villages a Statue of Liberty is erected trampling upon Chains and Fetters, with this Inscription over the Head, GOLDEN LIBERTY. In the first City I enter’d, all was quiet enough; yet I observ’d some of the Citizens distinguish’d themselves by certain Ribbands which they wore, and which, as I afterward understood, were Marks and Symbols of two Factions which then divided the People. The Avenues and Court-Yards of the Houses of the Great were lin’d with arm’d Soldiers, who always held themselves in Readiness, because the Truce being about two Days ago expir’d, the War was upon breaking out afresh. I fled away trembling as fast as I could, nor thought myself free, till I had convey’d myself out of Sight of this Land of Liberty.

The next Province is Jochtan, of which I had heard a short Description, which very much alarm’d me, and led me to think it must be the Seat of Disorder, Confusion, and Insecurity. For this Country was the Sink and Receptacle of all Religions. All the several Principles and Doctrines which prevail in any Part of this Globe, retire here as to their Center, and are taught publickly. Recollecting, therefore, what Troubles had been excited in Europe by religious Differences, I was almost afraid to approach the capital City, the several Streets and Portions of which have all Churches and Temples for different and opposite Sects. But my Fears soon vanish’d, when I observ’d a profound Agreement and Concord reign in every Part. With respect to their Politicks, there was the same Face, the same Sentiments, the same Tranquillity, and the same Care in all. For as the Laws made it capital for one Member of the State to disturb another in his Way of Worship, or to molest him upon Account of any religious Difference, hence whatever Dissensions they had were without the least Appearance of Hostility, their Disputes were without Bitterness or Invectives, and they had no Aversions, because they had no Persecutions. There was a perpetual, but very honest and worthy Emulation among the several Sects, every one of which endeavour’d to demonstrate the Excellence of their Religion by the Purity of their Life and Morals. Thus by the Wisdom of the Magistrate, all these different Sentiments excited no more Troubles in the State, than did the different Shops of the Artists and Merchants in the Forum, where the Buyers are invited by the sole Goodness of the Commodity, and where they use neither Fraud, Force, or Disparagement. By these Means, the least Seed of Discord is stifled in the Birth, and that Sort of Emulation only encourag’d, which is honourable in itself, and advantageous to the State. This convinc’d me, that the religious Troubles which reign in many Places arise not from the Variety of Religions, but from Persecution alone. A sensible and learned Jochtanian explain’d to me more at large the Genius of this Government, and the Causes of its Tranquillity. I heard him with Rapture, and his Observations I shall keep engrav’d on the Table of my Heart. I did indeed, for some Time, make Replies and Objections to him, but was at last forc’d to own myself vanquish’d, since he irresistibly prov’d all his Points by Arguments drawn from Experience. Asham’d, therefore, to contradict my Senses, and give the Lie to positive Matter of Fact, I was forc’d to own, that Liberty of Belief was the true Fountain of this Tranquillity and Concord. However, once more I attack’d my Adversary with an Argument different from all I had us’d. I told him it was the Duty of a Lawgiver, in erecting a Government, to regard the future, rather than the present Happiness of Mortals, and that he should conform his Scheme not so much to their Palate as to the Laws of God. To this he reply’d in this Manner: “My good Friend, says he, you are greatly deceiv’d, if you imagine that God, the Fountain of Truth, can be pleas’d with dissembled Worship. In other Nations, where all are oblig’d by publick Authority to one certain Rule of Faith, what a Door is open’d for Ignorance and Hypocrisy! Few, or none, have the Will or the Courage to discover their true Sentiments, and so they profess one Thing, and believe another. This makes the Study of Divinity a cold, lifeless Thing, and begets a Negligence in the Discovery of Truth. This also makes profane Learning more cultivated: For the Priests themselves, lest they should be branded with the Title of Hereticks, relinquish the Pursuit of sacred Things, and divert their Studies to other Subjects, where their Minds may range without Danger, and where their Liberty is not fetter’d. The Vulgar will still condemn all who depart from the reigning Doctrines. But Hypocrites and Dissemblers must be hateful to God, to whom a sincere, tho’ erroneous Belief, must be infinitely less displeasing than an orthodox, but pretended Faith.” Hearing this, I kept Silence, unable to dispute the Point any longer with so wise a People.

I had now been almost two Months out upon my Travels, when at last I arriv’d at Tumbac, a Territory contiguous to the Potuan Dominions. I thought myself now at home, my wearisome Journey being almost finish’d. The Inhabitants of this Region are chiefly Wild Olives, extremely devout, and extremely censorious. In the first Inn I enter’d, I waited two Hours for my Breakfast, knocking and calling for it almost all that Time in vain. The Reason of this Delay, was the unseasonable Devotion of my Host, who would not, for the World, put his Hand to the least Thing, till he had finish’d his Morning Prayers.

However, that Breakfast was one of the dearest in all my Travels, and I protest I never met with a Landlord more devout, or more unmerciful. Well! thought I to myself, this Landlord had better have pray’d less, and been more honest. But I dissembled my Resentment, well knowing how dangerous it is to provoke a Saint. The Citizens here were all Cato’s, all Censors of Manners. They walk’d up and down the Streets with pensive Looks and folded Arms, declaiming against the Vanity of the Times, and condemning every innocent Pleasure. Not a Gesture, not a Smile escap’d their Observation. And thus by their perpetual Censures, and envenom’d Zeal, they pass’d for Persons of eminent Sanctity. For my Part, as I was spent and exhausted with Fatigues, I made no Scruple of indulging in several innocent Diversions. But I got a bad Name by so doing, insomuch that every House I enter’d was like a Court of Justice, where I was sure to be arraign’d. Some, when they saw I was not at all mov’d by their Rebukes and Admonitions, shunn’d me like a Plague or a Contagion. I forbear to say more upon the Moroseness of this People: However, one Circumstance I must not omit, because it gives you their exact Character; and from this Sample you may judge of the rest. A certain Tumbacian, with whom I had been acquainted at Potu, being at an Inn, and seeing me go by, stept out to me, and press’d me to go in. I waited on him. As he had heard that I was far from being an Enemy to Pleasure, he gave me such a Lecture, and upbraided me with my Life and Morals in such Terms, that my Hair stood on End, and every Joint of me shook. But while our Cato was discharging thus the Artillery of his Censures, the Glass had pass’d very insensibly, but very briskly, from one to the other, till in short we both fell fairly fuddled on the Floor, and were carried off half dead. Having slept off this Debauch, and recover’d my Reason, I set myself to examine into the Nature of these People’s Religion; and I made a fair Discovery, that their Zeal flow’d rather from some vicious Humours, or a Predominancy of the bilious Juices, than from true Piety. But I never communicated this to any one, and left them without saying a Word.

At last, after two compleat Months, I arriv’d at Potu, so extremely weary with such incessant Exercise, that my Legs had scarce Strength to support my Body. It was on the tenth Day of the Month of Beeches that I enter’d this Capital. I went forthwith to his Serene Highness, and offer’d him my little Historical Collection, which he immediately order’d to be printed. (For it must be noted, that the Art of Printing, of which the Europeans and Chinese boast themselves to be Inventors, was of far greater Antiquity among the Potuans.) The People in general were so pleas’d with this Account of my Travels, that they were never weary of reading it. All Day long they were running about the Streets selling my Journal, and crying, as loud as they could, A Journey round the World, by Scabba, the King’s Messenger. Elated with this Success, I gave a Loose to my Ambition, and aspir’d to some Employment of greater Weight and Dignity. But seeing my Hopes not quickly answer’d, I preferr’d a new Petition to the Prince, wherein extolling my late Labours, I earnestly implor’d his Highness to vouchsafe me a proper Recompence. The Prince, who was Humanity in the Abstract, was sensibly touch’d with my Case, and graciously promis’d that he would have a due Regard to me. He was as good as his Word: But his whole Favour terminated in the Enlargement of my annual Salary. I thought I had Reason to expect a far better Recompence, and therefore I could not rest contented with this. But as I would not trouble his Highness any further, I open’d my Grief to the Chancellor. He heard me with his usual Humanity, and promis’d me all the good Offices in his Power; but at the same Time admonish’d me to desist from so wild a Petition, and begg’d me to consider the Measure of my Abilities, and the Weakness of my Judgment. “Nature, says he, has been but a Step-Mother to you, and has deny’d you those Powers of the Mind, which are requisite for the more arduous Offices of the State; and therefore you should not aim at what it is not possible for you to procure. Nay, the Prince himself, were he to comply with this weak Request of yours, must suffer in his Fame, as a Violator of the Laws. Rest contented therefore with your Condition, and renounce a Hope, which Nature has made unreasonable.” In Conclusion, he own’d I had some Merit, and particularly extoll’d my late Performance. But it is not, says he, Merit of this Kind that paves the Way to State-Preferment. ’Tis true, you have drawn a very pretty Picture of the World; but if for a Performance of this Kind we were to gratify you with the most honourable Employments, why might not a Painter for drawing a great Likeness, or a Sculptor for exhibiting a Statue in just Proportion, with as much Reason expect to be made a Senator? Merit should doubtless meet with a Recompence, and Rewards should be assign’d to the Deserving; but then they should be Rewards of such a Nature, as that the Commonwealth receive no Detriment, and suffer no Ridicule.

These Admonitions silenc’d me for a While. But as I could not bear to think of growing old in this vile Employ, I resum’d that desperate Resolution, which had laid dormant a long Time, of attempting a Reformation in the State, by which Project I might, at one and the same Time, help forward the publick Good, and my own too.

A little before I set out upon my late Travels, I had closely study’d the Nature of this Government, to see if I could discover any Defects, and at the same Time what Remedies were proper for them. Since that, in the Province of Cockleku, I had observ’d that the Government there was in a tottering Condition, by reason of the Admission of Women to the Management of publick Affairs, that Sex being naturally ambitious, still aiming to extend their Power, nor ever resting till they have acquir’d a full and absolute Authority. Hereupon I determin’d to bring in a Bill to exclude that Sex from the Administration of publick Affairs. I flatter’d myself I should find Multitudes to abet and espouse this Point, since it was an easy Matter to make it very clear, and to shew beyond Contradiction the Misfortunes that flow from this Defect in the State, and the Danger the Male Sex was in, unless the Wings of such an unnatural Power were timely clipt. And if it should so happen, that the Abolition of this ancient Custom should appear to some to be too hazardous an Attempt, in such Case I humbly offer’d, that the Female Power should be at least restrain’d and abridg’d.

This Scheme of mine had three Ends in view. First, to remove an Inconvenience the State labour’d under. Secondly, by producing a Specimen of my Sagacity and Judgment, I had Hopes to mend my Condition. And, thirdly, I thought by these Means to revenge certain Taunts and Affronts I had receiv’d from many of the Females of this Country. I frankly confess, that my own private Interest, and a Desire of Revenge, were the primum Mobile of this Project. But then I artfully conceal’d these Views, lest under a Pretence of publick Good, I should seem only to pursue my own, and so tread in the Steps of other Innovators, whose Schemes breathe nothing but the publick Good, when it is evident to the dullest Observer, that their private Interest is the Spring that moves the whole Machine.

And now, having drest my Project out to the best Advantage, and strengthen’d it by the most powerful Reasons I could invent, I waited upon the Prince, and humbly offer’d it to him. His Highness, who had always testify’d a great Regard to me, was thunderstruck at the Boldness and Folly of my Undertaking, which he foreboded must end in my irreparable Ruin. Wherefore he endeavour’d to dissuade me from this mad Attempt by the strongest Intreaties:

——Precibusque minas regaliter addit.

I, for my Part, relying as well upon the Utility of my Project, as upon the Favour of the Male Sex (who I was in Hopes would not desert the common Cause) remain’d immovable to all his Highness said, nor could his repeated Admonitions vanquish my Obstinacy. In fine, according to the Custom of the Country, I was brought to the Forum, and there, with my Neck in a Halter, I stood waiting the Judgment of the Senate. That venerable Body debated the Matter, and soon came to a Resolution; which Resolution was sent up to the Prince for his Confirmation; and being return’d by him, was read aloud by a publick Officer. It run thus:

“After due Examination, we are of Opinion as follows: That the Project of Scabba, the King’s Messenger, to exclude the Female Sex from publick Business, cannot take Effect without the highest Detriment to the Commonwealth, since no less than Half of the Nation, which consists of the said Sex, must look upon this Innovation as a very great Hardship, and their Resentment may occasion infinite Disorders. Moreover we are of Opinion, that it is absurd and unjust, intirely to exclude Trees of the finest Talents from publick Honours, especially as Nature, who does nothing in vain, can never be suppos’d to have given them all those noble Advantages to no Purpose. We are persuaded, that for the Welfare of the State, Regard ought to be had not to the Name, but the Abilities of a Person. And as a Country may often labour under a Want of able Persons, we think it a great Folly, by one Act of Senate, to render one intire Half of the Nation incapable and unworthy of Employment, solely upon Account of their Birth. For these and divers other good Reasons we are of Opinion, that the said Scabba, for this foolish and rash Attempt, ought to be punish’d according to the Custom of our Ancestors.”

The Prince was extremely concern’d for my Misfortune, but as he never rescinded the Decree of the Senate, he sign’d it with his own Hand, and affix’d the Royal Seal to it, and commanded it to be made publick, inserting however this mollifying Clause, That as I was a Foreigner, a Native of a new and unknown World, where forward Geniuses are in great Esteem, I should be exempted from capital Punishment. But lest by a total Remission of the Sentence the Laws should suffer an Infringement, it was therefore thought fit to detain me in Prison till the Beginning of the Month of Birches, and that then, with other Violators of the Law, I should be banish’d to the Firmament.

This Sentence being publish’d, I was clapt into Prison. Some of my Friends persuaded me to protest against this Sentence, since among my Judges there were so many Matrons and Virgins, all Judges in their own Cause. Some advis’d me, as the safer Way, to make a fair Acknowledgment of my Crime, and lay the Blame upon my own native human Weakness. But this last Advice I rejected with great Constancy, out of Respect to Mankind, upon whose Character such a Confession would leave an indelible Blemish.

I heard soon after, that his Highness had determin’d to give me an absolute Pardon, if I would but only prostrate myself at his Feet, confess my Fault, and implore his Favour, although Rahagna the Treasurer oppos’d that Motion with Might and Main. But, to speak the Truth, I was not displeas’d with the Sentence. For Death was not half so terrible to me as that Employment they pick’d out for me; and I was weary of conversing longer with these Trees, who had so high an Opinion of their Wisdom. I hop’d also to meet with better Treatment in the Firmament, where I had heard, that all Strangers, without Distinction, were kindly receiv’d.