My name is Captain Wooden-head;
Of nothing I’m afraid;
To many a gallant fight I’ve led
The Nursery Brigade.
One day amidst the din and strife
(My post was always there)
I nearly lost my precious life—
A ball whizzed through the air!
It put me out of action quite,
And—hero though I be—
No longer do I wish to fight,
A peaceful life for me!