"The Evening Song of the Tyrolese Peasants" by Mrs. Hemans, must close our extracts from the present volume:—

Come to the Sun-set Tree!

The day is past and gone;

The woodman's axe lies free,

And the reaper's work is done.

The twilight-star to Heaven,

And the summer-dew to flowers,

And rest to us is given

By the cool soft evening hours.

Sweet is the hour of rest!

Pleasant the wind's low sigh,

And the gleaming of the west,

And the turf whereon we lie.

When the burden and the heat

Of labour's task are o'er,

And kindly voices greet

The tired one at his door.

Come to the Sun-set Tree!

The day is past and gone;

The woodman's axe lies free,

And the reaper's work is done.

Yes: tuneful is the sound

That dwells in whispering boughs:

Welcome the freshness round,

And the gale that fans our brows.

But rest more sweet and still

Than ever night-fall gave,

Our longing hearts shall fill,

In the world beyond the grave.

There shall no tempest blow,

No scorching noon-tide heat;

There shall be no more snow,

No weary wandering feet.

And we lift our trusting eyes,

From the hills our fathers trod.

To the quiet of the skies,

To the sabbath of our God.

Come to the Sun-set Tree!

The day is past and gone:

The woodman's axe lies free,

And the reaper's work is done.

We have only room to particularize the Boroom Slave, by Mrs. Bowditch; the Magician's Visiter, by Neele; and Scenes in the Life of a Favourite; all which possess very powerful interest. Mr. Hood, too, has two oddities—Death in the Kitchen, after Sterne, and the Logicians, accompanied by engravings. Indeed, the literary variety of the present Forget Me Not is highly creditable to the editor, Mr. Shoberl.


FRIENDSHIP'S OFFERING.

To begin with the exterior, which is somewhat novel in taste, the proprietors seem to have united the utile cum dulci, by substituting for the usual paper covering, an elegantly embossed leather binding. This is altogether an improvement on the original plan, since the slight coverings of silk or paper is scarcely safe out of the drawing-room or boudoir, and some of the contributions to the "annuals" entitle them to a higher stand. The presentation plate of the present Offering is a chaste and classical specimen of a kind of gold enamel engraving; The Sylph, engraved by Humphreys, is a pleasing picture; Virginia Water, from a picture by Daniell, is a delightful scene of rural repose; a Sculpture Group, by Fry; a View of Bombay; and the Captive Slave, by Finden; among the embellishments, are entitled to our commendatory notice.

The present editor is Mr. Charles Knight, who, according to his preface, succeeded "at an advanced period of the year to the duties which had previously been performed by a gentleman of acknowledged taste and ability." This may account for the imperfect state of some of the engravings; but the apology is not so requisite for the execution of the literary portion of the present volume. Our extracts must be short, for we have other claimants to our attention. The Housekeepers, a Shandean extract, is from one of the best prose contributors:—

There were two heavy, middle-aged merchants; they were either Dutch or German, I know not which, but their name was Vanderclump. Most decided old bachelors they were, with large, leathern, hanging cheeks, sleepy grey eyes, and round shoulders. They were men not given to much speech, but great feeders; and, when waited upon, would point clumsily to what they wanted, and make a sort of low growl, rather than be at the trouble to speak. These Messrs. Vanderclump were served by two tall, smooth-faced dawdles; I never could discover which held the superior station in the ménage. Each has been seen trotting home from market with a basket on her arm; each might be observed to shake a duster out of the upper windows; each would, occasionally, carry a huge bunch of keys, or wait at table during dinner; and, in the summer evenings, when it was not post-day, both of them would appear, dressed alike, sitting at work at the lower counting-house window, with the blinds thrown wide open. Both, I suppose, were housekeepers.

It happened, one cold, foggy spring, that the younger brother, Mr. Peter Vanderclump, left London to transact some business of importance with a correspondent at Hamburgh, leaving his brother Anthony to the loneliness of their gloomy house in St. Mary Axe. Week after week passed away, and Mr. Peter was still detained at Hamburgh. Who would have supposed that his society could have been missed? that the parlour could have seemed more dismally dull by the absence of one of those from whom it chiefly derived its character of dulness? Mr. Anthony took up his largest meerchaum, and enveloped himself in its smoke by the hour; but the volumes of smoke cleared away, and no Peter Vanderclump appeared emerging from the mist. Mr. Anthony brought some of his heavy folios from below; and, in their pages of interest, (no common, but often compound, interest,) lost, for awhile, the dreary sense of loneliness. But, a question was to be asked! Peter's solemn "yah" or "nien" was waited for in vain. Forgetful, and almost impatient, Anthony looked up—the chair was unoccupied which his brother had constantly filled.

Mr. Anthony began to sigh—he got into a habit of sighing. Betty and Molly (they were soft-hearted baggages) felt for their master—pitied their poor master! Betty was placing the supper on the table one evening, when her master sighed very heavily. Betty sighed also, and the corners of her mouth fell—their eyes met—something like a blush crimsoned Betty's sleek, shining cheek, when, on raising her eyes again, her master was still staring at her. Betty simpered, and, in her very soft, very demure voice ventured to say, "Was there any thing she could do?" Mr. Vanderclump rose up from his chair. Betty, for the first time, felt awed by his approach. "Batee!" he said, "my poor Batee! Hah! you are a goot girl!" He chucked her under the chin with his large hand. Betty looked meek, and blushed, and simpered again. There was a pause—Mr. Vanderclump was the first to disturb it. "Hah! hah!" he exclaimed, gruffly, as if suddenly recollecting himself; and, thrusting both hands into his capacious breeches-pockets, he sat down to supper, and took no further notice of Betty that night.

The next morning, the sun seemed to have made a successful struggle with the dense London atmosphere, and shone full in Mr. Vanderclump's face while he was at breakfast, and set a piping bullfinch singing a tune, which his master loved rather for the sake of old associations, than from any delight in music. Then Lloyd's List was full of arrivals, and the Price Current had that morning some unusual charm about it, which I cannot even guess at. Mr. Vanderclump looked upon the bright and blazing fire; his eye rested, with a calm and musing satisfaction, on the light volumes of steam rising from the spout of the tea-kettle, as it stood, rather murmuring drowsily, than hissing, upon the hob. There was, he might have felt, a sympathy between them. They were both placidly puffing out the warm and wreathing smoke.

He laid down his pipe, and took half a well-buttered muffin into his capacious mouth at a bite; he washed the mouthful down, with a large dish of tea, and he felt in better spirits. That morning he entered the counting-house rubbing his hands.

Within an hour a crowd of huge, dusky clouds shut out the merry sunshine, and the Hamburgh mail brought no tidings whatever of Mr. Peter. Mr. Anthony worked himself up into a thorough ill-humour again, and swore at his clerks, because they asked him questions. When he entered his apartment that evening he felt more desolate than ever. Betty placed a barrel of oysters on the table—he heeded her not;—a large German sausage—his eyes were fixed on the ground;—a piece of Hamburgh beef —Mr. Vanderclump looked up for an instant, and, Europa-like, his thoughts crossed the sea, upon that beef, to Hamburgh. Gradually, however, a genial warmth spread throughout the room, for Betty stirred up the fire, and let down the curtains, and snuffed the dim candles; while Molly loaded the table with bottles of divers shapes and sizes, a basin of snow-white sugar, and a little basket of limes, of well-known and exquisite flavour; placing, at the same time, a very small kettle of boiling water on the fire.—"Why, Mollee! my goot girl!" said Mr. Vanderclump, in a low and somewhat melancholy tone, (his eyes had mechanically followed these latter proceedings,) "Mollee! that is ponch!" —"La, sir! and why not?" replied the damsel, almost playfully. "Why not be comfortable and cheery? I am sure"—and here she meant to look encouraging, her usual simper spreading to a smile—"I am sure Betty and I would do our best to make you so."

"Goot girls, goot girls!" said Mr. Vanderclump, his eyes fixed all the while upon the supper-table—he sat down to it. "My goot girls!" said he, soon after, "you may go down; I do not want you; you need not wait." The two timid, gentle creatures instantly obeyed. More than an hour elapsed, and then Mr. Vanderclump's bell rang. The two matronly maidens were very busily employed in making a new cap. Betty rose at once; but suddenly recollecting that she had been trying on her new and unfinished cap, and had then only a small brown cotton skull-cap on her head, she raised both her hands to her head to be certain of this, and then said, "Do, Molly, there's a dear! answer the bell; for such a figure as I am, I could not go before master, no how. See, I have unpicked this old cap for a little bit of French edging at the back." Molly looked a little peevish; but her cap was on her head, and up stairs she went. Mr. Vanderclump was sitting before the fire, puffing lustily from his eternal pipe. "Take away," he said abruptly, "and put the leetle table here." He pointed and growled, and the sagacious Molly understood. She placed the table beside him, and upon it the punch, which he had been drinking. "Batee, my poor Batee!" said Mr. Vanderclump, who had not yet noticed that Betty was absent. "It is not Betty, but Molly, sir!" replied the latter damsel, in a voice of childlike simplicity. "Hah!" said he, apparently considering for a moment, "Hah! Batee, Mollee, all the same! Mollee, my poor Mollee, you are a goot girl! Get up to-morrow morning, my poor Mollee, and put on your best gown, and I will marry you!" Molly, was, as she afterwards declared, struck all of a heap. She gaped, and gasped with astonishment; and then a power of words were rushing and racing up her throat to her tongue's end: a glance at her master stopped their explosion. His hands were in his pockets, his face towards the fire, his pipe in his mouth. "Yes, sir," she replied, humbly and distinctly. A few tears trickled down her cheeks, as she curtseyed low at the door, and disappeared. She knew his ways, she thought within herself, as she walked very slowly down the stairs, and she congratulated herself that she had not risked another word in reply. "And now, Betty," she said, as she entered the kitchen, "I'll put the finishing stitch to my cap, and go to bed, for master will want nothing more to-night." She sat down quietly to work, and conversed quietly with Betty, not disclosing a word of her new prospects, Betty, however, observed that she took off the trimming with which her new cap had been already half-adorned. "Why, bless me, Molly!" she cried, "you are not going to put on that handsome white satin bow, are you?"—"Why, yes! I think I shall," replied Molly, "for now I look at your cap, with that there yellow riband upon it, mine seems to me quite old-maidish."

The next morning, Molly got up before her sister, and put on her best gown and her new cap. The morning was dark and dull, and Betty was sleepy, and Molly kept the window-curtain and the bed-curtains closely drawn. Unsuspected, she slipped out of the chamber, her shawl and her bonnet in her hand.

As the clock struck eight, Molly was standing beside her master before the rails of the marriage-altar; and, not long after, she burst upon the astonished eyes of her sister, as Mrs. Vanderclump.


La Villegiatura is a pleasant article; but we do not think there is much of the "love of pastoral associations" left in the English character, and we are sorry for it. The Rustic Wreath, by Miss Mitford, is very sweet; the Cacadore, a story of the peninsular war, is a soul-stirring narrative; there is much pleasantry in Mrs. Hofland's Comforts of Conceitedness; Virginia Water, by the editor, could hardly be written by his fireside—it has too much local inspiration in every line; Auguste de Valcour, by the author of Gilbert Earle, is in his usual felicitous vein of philosophic melancholy; Miss Roberts has a glittering Tale of Normandy; the Orphans, by the editor, is simple and pathetic; Palinodia we subjoin:—

There was a time when I could feel

All passion's hopes and fears,

And tell what tongues can ne'er reveal,

By smiles, and sighs, and tears.

The days are gone! no more, no more,

The cruel fates allow;

And, though I'm hardly twenty-four,

I'm not a lover now.

Lady, the mist is on my sight,

The chill is on my brow;

My day is night, my bloom is blight—

I'm not a lover now!

I never talk about the clouds,

I laugh at girls and boys,

I'm growing rather fond of crowds,

And very fond of noise;

I never wander forth alone

Upon the mountain's brow;

I weighed, last winter, sixteen stone,—

I'm not a lover now!

I never wish to raise a veil,

I never raise a sigh;

I never tell a tender tale,

I never tell a lie;

I cannot kneel as once I did;

I've quite forgot my bow;

I never do as I am bid,—

I'm not a lover now!

I make strange blunders every day,

If I would be gallant,

Take smiles for wrinkles, black for grey.

And nieces for their aunt;

I fly from folly, though it flows

From lips of loveliest glow;

I don't object to length of nose,—

I'm not a lover now!

The muse's steed is very fleet—

I'd rather ride my mare;

The poet hunts a quaint conceit—

I'd rather hunt a hare;

I've learnt to utter yours and you

Instead of thine and thou;

And oh! I can't endure a Blue!—

I'm not a lover now!

I find my Ovid dry,

My Petrarch quite a pill,

Cut Fancy for Philosophy,

Tom Moore for Mr. Mill;

And belles may read, and beaux may write,

I care not who or how;

I burnt my album Sunday night,—

I'm not a lover now!

I don't encourage idle dreams

Of poison or of ropes,

I cannot dine on airy schemes,

I cannot sup on hopes:

New milk, I own is very fine,

Just foaming from the cow;

But yet I want my pint of wine,—

I'm not a lover now!

When Laura sings young hearts away,

I'm deafer than the deep;

When Leonora goes to play,

I sometimes go to sleep;

When Mary draws her white gloves out,

I never dance, I vow:

"Too hot to kick one's heels about!"—

I'm not a lover now!

I'm busy now with state affairs,

I prate of Pitt and Fox;

I ask the price of rail-road shares,

I watch the turns of stocks:

And this is life! no verdure blooms

Upon the withered bough.

I save a fortune in perfumes,—

I'm not a lover now!

I may be yet what others are,

A boudoir's babbling fool;

The flattered star of bench or har,

A party's chief or tool:

Come shower or sunshine, hope or fear,

The palace or the plough—

My heart and lute are broken here,—

I'm not a lover now!

Lady, the mist is on my sight,

The chill is on my brow;

My day is night, my bloom is blight,—

I'm not a lover now!

The First Ball, by L.E.L. is rife and gay; which, with Mr. Croker's Three Advices, are all we can spare room to point out to our readers.


The Amulet.

Of this volume we have already availed ourselves. Some of the engravings are in a vigorous and first-rate style of excellence; the binding, too, is somewhat gay for so grave a title—being crimson silk. Our favourites are a Voyage Round the World, by Montgomery, one of the best poems of the year; Faustus, with a Visit to Goethe; Angel Visits, by Mrs. Hemans; The Departed, by L.E.L.; and some pieces by the editor, Mr. Hall. Our present extract is

THE LAST VOYAGE. A TRUE STORY.

By Mrs. Opie.

We cannot fail to observe, as we advance in life, how vividly our earliest recollections recur to us, and this consciousness is accompanied by a melancholy pleasure, when we are deprived of those who are most tenderly associated with such remembrances, because they bring the beloved dead "before our mind's eye;" and beguile the loneliness of the present hour, by visions of the past. In such visions I now often love to indulge, and in one of them, a journey to Y—— was recently brought before me, in which my ever-indulgent father permitted me to accompany him, when I was yet but a child.

As we drove through C——r, a village within three miles of Y——, he directed my attention to a remarkable rising, or conical mound of earth, on the top of the tower of C——r church. He then kindly explained the cause of this singular, and distinguishing appearance, and told me the traditionary anecdote connected with it; which now, in my own words, I am going to communicate to my readers.

It is generally supposed, that great grief makes the heart so selfishly absorbed in its own sufferings, as to render it regardless of the sufferings of others; but the conduct of her, who is the heroine of the following tale, will prove to this general rule an honourable exception.

I know nothing of her birth, and parentage, nor am I acquainted even with her name—but I shall call her Birtha—the story goes, that she lived at C——r, a village three miles from Y—— in N——, and was betrothed to the mate of a trading vessel, with the expectation of marrying him, when he had gained money sufficient, by repeated voyages, to make their union consistent with prudence.

In the meanwhile, there is reason to believe that Birtha was not idle, but contrived to earn money herself, in order to expedite the hour of her marriage; and at length, her lover (whom I shall call William) thought that there was no reason for him to continue his sea-faring life, but at the end of one voyage more, he should be able to marry the woman of his choice, and engage in some less dangerous employment, in his native village.

Accordingly, the next time that he bade farewell to Birtha, the sorrow of their parting hour was soothed by William's declaring, that, as the next voyage would be his last, he should expect, when he returned, to find every thing ready for their marriage.

This was a pleasant expectation, and Birtha eagerly prepared to fulfil it.

By the time that Birtha was beginning to believe that William was on his voyage home, her neighbours would often help her to count the days which would probably elapse before the ship could arrive; but when they were not in her presence, some of the experienced amongst the men used to express a hope, the result of fear, that William would return time enough to avoid certain winds, which made one part of the navigation on that coast particularly dangerous.

Birtha herself, had, no doubt, her fears, as well as her hopes; but there are some fears which the lip of affection dares not utter, and this was one of them.

Birtha dreaded to have her inquiries respecting that dangerous passage, answered by "Yes, we know that it is a difficult navigation;" she also dreaded to be told by some kind, but ill-judging friends, to "trust in Providence;" as, by such advice, the reality of the danger would be still more powerfully confirmed to her. This recommendation would to her have been needless, as well as alarming; for she had, doubtless, always relied on Him who is alone able to save, and she knew that the same "Almighty arm was underneath" her lover still, which had hitherto preserved him in the time of need.

Well—time went on, and we will imagine the little garden before the door of the house which Birtha had hired, new gravelled, fresh flowers sown and planted there; the curtains ready to be put up; the shelves bright with polished utensils; table linen, white as the driven snow, enclosed in the newly-purchased chest of drawers; and the neat, well chosen wedding-clothes, ready for the approaching occasion: we will also picture to ourselves, the trembling joy of Birtha, when her eager and sympathizing neighbours rushed into her cottage, disturbing her early breakfast, with the glad tidings, that William's ship had been seen approaching the dangerous passage with a fair wind, and that there was no doubt but that he would get over it safe, and in day-light! How sweet is it to be the messenger and the bearer of good news, but it is still sweeter to know that one has friends who have pleasure in communicating pleasure to us!

But Birtha's joy was still mingled with anxiety, and she probably passed that day in alternate restlessness and prayer.

Towards night the wind rose high, blowing from a quarter unfavourable to the safety of the ship, and it still continued to blow in this direction when night and darkness had closed on all around.

Darkness at that moment seemed to close also upon the prospects of Birtha! for she knew that there was no beacon, no landmark to warn the vessel of its danger, and inform the pilot what coast they were approaching, and what perils they were to avoid; and, it is probable, that the almost despairing girl was, with her anxious friends, that livelong night a restless wanderer on the nearest shore.

With the return of morning came the awful confirmation of their worst fears!

There was no remaining vestige of William's vessel, save the top of the mast, which shewed where it had sunk beneath the waves, and proved that the hearts which in the morning had throbbed high with tender hopes and joyful expectations were then cold and still "beneath the mighty waters!" How different now was the scene in Birtha's cottage, to that which it exhibited during the preceding morning.

That changed dwelling was not indeed deserted, for sympathizing neighbours came to it as before; but though many may be admitted with readiness when it is a time for congratulation, it is only the few who can be welcome in a season of sorrow; and Birtha's sorrow, though quiet, was deep—while neither her nearest relative, nor dearest friend, could do any thing to assist her, save, by removing from her sight the new furniture, or the new dresses, which had been prepared for those happy hours that now could never be hers.

At length, however, Birtha, who had always appeared calm and resigned, seemed cheerful also! still she remained pale, as in the first moments of her trial, save when a feverish flush occasionally increased the brightness of her eyes; but she grew thinner and thinner, and her impeded breath made her affectionate friends suspect that she was going into a rapid decline.

Medical aid was immediately called in, and Birtha's pleased conviction that her end was near, was soon, though reluctantly confirmed to her, at her own request.

It is afflicting to see an invalid rejoice in knowing that the hour of death is certainly approaching; because it proves the depth and poignancy of the previous sufferings: but then the sight is comforting and edifying also. It is comforting, because it proves that the dying person is supported by the only "help that faileth not;" and it is edifying, because it invites those who behold it to endeavour to believe, that they also may live and die like the departing Christian.

But it was not alone the wish "to die and be with Christ," nor the sweet expectation of being united in another world to him whom she had lost, that was the cause of Birtha's increasing cheerfulness, as the hour of her dissolution drew nigh. No—

Her generous heart was rejoicing in a project which she had conceived, and which would, if realized, be the source of benefit to numbers yet unborn. She knew from authority which she could not doubt, that had there been a proper landmark on the shore, her lover and his ship would not, in all human probability, have perished.

"Then," said Birtha, "henceforth there shall be a land-mark on this coast! and I will furnish it! Here at least, no fond and faithful girl shall again have to lament over her blighted prospects, and pine, and suffer as I have done."

She sent immediately for the clergyman of the parish, made her will, and had a clause inserted to the following effect: "I desire that I may be buried on the top of the tower of C——r church! and that my grave may be made very high, and pointed, in order to render it a perpetual land-mark to all ships approaching that dangerous navigation where he whom I loved was wrecked. I am assured, that, had there been a land-mark on the tower of C—— church, his ship might have escaped; and I humbly trust, that my grave will always be kept up, according to my will, to prevent affectionate hearts, in future, from being afflicted as mine has been; and I leave a portion of my little property in the hands of trustees, for ever, to pay for the preservation of the above-mentioned grave, in all its usefulness!"

Before she died, the judicious and benevolent sufferer had the satisfaction of being assured, that her intentions would be carried into effect.

Her last moments were therefore cheered by the belief, that she would be graciously permitted to be, even after death, a benefit to others, and that her grave might be the means of preserving some of her fellow-creatures from shipwreck and affliction.

Nor was her belief a delusive one—-The conical grave in question gives so remarkable an appearance to the tower of C——r church, when it is seen at sea, even at a distance, that if once observed it can never be forgotten, even by those to whom the anecdote connected with it is unknown —therefore, as soon as it appears in sight, pilots know that they are approaching a dangerous coast, and take measures to avoid its perils.

But if the navigation on that coast is no longer as perilous as it was, when the heroine of this story was buried, and the tower of C——r church is no longer a necessary land-mark, still her grave remains a pleasing memorial of one, whose active benevolence rose superior to the selfishness both of sorrow and of sickness; and enabled her, even on the bed of death, to contrive and will for the benefit of posterity.

It is strange, but true, that the name of this humble, but privileged being, is not on record; but many whose names are forgotten on earth, have been, I doubt not, received and rewarded in heaven.


The Bijou

Is a new adventurer in the "annual" field, and deserves a foremost rank as a work of art. Thus, the Child with Flowers, by Humphreys, after Sir Thomas Laurence, is really fit company for the president's beautiful picture; the Boy and Dog, by the same painter and engraver, is also very fine; but the selection of both of the pictures for one volume is hardly judicious. With Haddon Hall our readers are already familiar. Sans Souci, after Stothard, is a delightful scene. In the literature, almost the only very striking composition is Sir Walter Scott's illustration of Wilkie's painting of the baronet's own family, which, having been copied into every newspaper, we do not reprint. For our part, we do not admire the painting; there is too much rank and file for a family group. Mr. Hood has a Lament of Chivalry, in his best style; and a few Verses for an Album, by Charles Lamb, are to our taste.

A LAMENT FOR THE DECLINE OF CHIVALRY.

BY THOMAS HOOD, ESQ.

Well hast thou cried, departed Burke,

All chivalrous romantic work,

Is ended now and past!—

That iron age—which some have thought

Of metal rather overwrought—

Is now all over-cast!

Ay,—where are those heroic knights

Of old—those armadillo wights

Who wore the plated vest,—

Great Charlemagne, and all his peers

Are cold—enjoying with their spears

An everlasting rest!—

The bold King Arthur sleepeth sound,

So sleep his knights who gave that Round

Old Table such eclat!

Oh Time has pluck'd the plumy brow!

And none engage at turneys now

But those who go to law!

Grim John o' Gaunt is quite gone by,

And Guy is nothing but a Guy,

Orlando lies forlorn!—

Bold Sidney, and his kidney—nay,

Those "early champions"—what are they

But Knights without a morn!

No Percy branch now perseveres

Like those of old in breaking spears—

The name is now a lie!—

Surgeons, alone, by any chance,

Are all that ever couch a lance

To couch a body's eye!

Alas! for Lion-Hearted Dick,

That cut the Moslem to the quick,

His weapon lies in peace,—

Oh, it would warm them in a trice,

If they could only have a spice

Of his old mace in Greece!

The fam'd Rinaldo lies a-cold,

And Tancred too, and Godfrey bold,

That scal'd the holy wall!

No Saracen meets Paladin,

We hear of no great Saladin,

But only grow the small!

Our Cressys too have dwindled since

To penny things—at our Black Prince

Historic pens would scoff—

The only one we moderns had

Was nothing but a Sandwich lad,

And measles took him off:—

Where are those old and feudal clans,

Their pikes, and bills, and partizans!

Their hauberks—jerkins—buffs?

A battle was a battle then,

A breathing piece of work—but men

Fight now with powder puffs!

The curtal-axe is out of date!

The good old cross-bow bends to Fate,

'Tis gone—the archer's craft!

No tough arm bends the springing yew.

And jolly draymen ride, in lieu

Of Death, upon the shaft.—

The spear—the gallant tilter's pride

The rusty spear is laid aside,

Oh spits now domineer!—

The coat of mail is left alone,—

And where is all chain armour gone?

Go ask at Brighton Pier.

We fight in ropes and not in lists,

Bestowing hand-cuffs with our fists,

A low and vulgar art!—

No mounted man is overthrown—

A tilt!—It is a thing unknown—

Except upon a cart.

Methinks I see the bounding barb,

Clad like his Chief in steely garb,

For warding steel's appliance!—

Methinks I hear the trumpet stir!

'Tis but the guard to Exeter,

That bugles the "Defiance!"

In cavils when will cavaliers

Set ringing helmets by the ears,

And scatter plumes about?

Or blood—if they are in the vein?

That tap will never run again—

Alas the Casque is out!

No iron-crackling now is scor'd

By dint of battle-axe or sword,

To find a vital place—

Though certain Doctors still pretend

Awhile, before they kill a friend,

To labour through his case.

Farewell, then, ancient men of might!

Crusader! errant squire, and knight!

Our coats and customs soften,—

To rise would only make ye weep—

Sleep on, in rusty iron sleep,

As in a safety-coffin!


VERSES FOR AN ALBUM.

Fresh clad from Heaven in robes of white

A young probationer of light.

Thou wert, my soul, an Album bright.

A spotless leaf but thought, and care—

And friends, and foes, in foul or fair,

Have "written strange defeature" there.

And Time, with heaviest hand of all,

Like that fierce writing on the wall,

Hath stamp'd sad dates—he can't recall.

And error gilding worst designs—

Like speckled snake that strays and shines—

Betrays his path by crooked lines.

And vice hath left his ugly blot—

And good resolves, a moment hot,

Fairly began—but finish'd not.

And fruitless late remorse doth trace—

Like Hebrew lore, a backward pace—

Her irrecoverable race.

Disjointed numbers—sense unknit—

Huge reams of folly—shreds of wit—

Compose the mingled mass of it.

My scalded eyes no longer brook,

Upon this ink-blurr'd thing to look,

Go—shut the leaves—and clasp the book!—


THE LITERARY POCKET-BOOK.

Is this year resumed, but we think it is not so successful as, were its previous fasciculi. The "literary" is a good epithet for its sale among would-be authors, like the "Gentleman's" Magazine among a certain class of worthies. But of what use are such articles as the following to literary men:—The Seasons, by a Man of Taste, (like the carte of a restaurateur;) Sayings of a Man about Town; Remonstrance with J.F. Newton; Lines on Crockford's &c.—all amusing enough in their way, but, in a literary pocket-book, out of place, and not in good taste. The "lists," too, the only useful portion of the volume, are, in many instances, very incorrect. Apropos, how long has Morris Birbeck been dead? Our Illinois friend might be alive when the editor published his last pocket-book; but if he stands still, time does not. There is, too, an affectation of fashion about the work which does not suit our sober taste; but as a seasonable Christmas extract, we are induced to quote Winter from the Seasons:—

Now is the high season of beef; beef, which Prometheus killed for us at first, ere he filched the fire from heaven, with which to constitute it a beef-steak—that foundation of the most delightful of clubs, and origin of the most delightful of all memoirs of them. Nor be the sirloin, boast of Englishmen, forgot! nor its vaunted origin; which proves that the age of chivalry, despite of Burke, is not yet gone! Stewed beef too, and ample round, and filet de boeuf saute dans sa glace, and stewed rump-steaks, and ox-tail soup.

"Spirits of beef, where are ye? are ye all fled?"

Henry the Eighth.

No—when beef flies the English shores, then you may, as the immortal bard exquisitely expresses it, "make a silken purse out of a sow's ear." But mutton, too, invites my Muse. It is calculated that fifteen hundred thousand sheep are annually sacrificed in London to the carnivorous taste of John Bull. "Of roast mutton (as Dr. Johnson says) what remains for me to say? It will be found sometimes succous, and sometimes defective of moisture; but what palate has ever failed to be pleased with a haunch which has been duly suspended? what appetite has not been awakened by the fermentation that glitters on its surface, when it has been reposing for the requisite number of hours before a fire equal in its fervency?"

We quite agree with Dr. Johnson; but a boiled leg of mutton, its whiteness transparent through the verdant capers that decorate its candour, is not to be despised; nor is a hash, whether celebrated as an Irish stew, or a hachis de mouton, most relishing of rifacciamenti! Chops and garlic à la Francaise are exquisite; and the saddle, cut learnedly, is the Elysium of a gourmand.

Now also is the time of house-lamb and of doe-venison. Now is the time of Christmas come, and the voice of the turkey is heard in our land! This is the period of their annual massacre—a new slaughter of the innocents! The Norwich coaches are now laden with mortals; that, while alive, shared with their equally intelligent townsmen, fruges consumere nati, the riches of their agricultural county.

Let others talk as they will about the Greek and the Ottoman!—in cookery, I abhor Greece, and love Turkey. And yet how inconsistent I am in my politics! for I sometimes regard the partition of Turkey as a thing well purchased by the sacrifice of every Ottoman in the world—would they were all under my feet!—especially when I have the gout. I confess, the dismemberment of Poland did not affect me much. A man who is much accustomed to dismember fowls, will not care much about that of kingdoms.

Nor be the cod (a blessing on his head—and shoulders!) forgotten. Beautifully candid, his laminae separate readily before the tranchant silver, and each flake, covered with a creamy curd, lies ready to receive the affusion of molten (not oiled) butter, which, with its floating oyster-islands, seems in impatient agitation for the moment of overflowing the alluring "white creature," as a modern poet styles it.


TIMES TELESCOPE.

Having transported the public for the term of fourteen years, our readers need not be told that the present is the fifteenth volume. We should say more in its praise had it said less in our own. In richness and variety it is quite equal to any of its predecessors; and we promise our readers an occasional sip of its original sweets.


The Keepsake and the Christmas-Box (the latter a juvenile annual) must stand over for an early number.


Footnote 1: (return)

We hope this epithet will not be considered ungallant—for, to say the truth, the ladies have contributed the best poetical portion of the feast. This display of female talent has increased in brilliancy year after year: and the Lords should look to it.


Printed and published by J. LIMBIRD, 143, Strand, (near Somerset House,) and sold by all Newsmen and Booksellers.