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   NEWSLETTER: "CELEBRATING 'FREEDOM DAY' BY STAYING INSIDE AND ONLINE AS
   USUAL"
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 "Celebrating 'Freedom Day' by staying inside and online as usual"
 This Week:
 * IMAGES: Books with titles that match artwork
 * QUIZ - recognise the film from the AI image
 * CHALLENGE: 'Animal Holidays'
 -------------------------------------------------
 ________  ____ __  ___
 ____/  _)|_  // /_/ _ |     "We're shaving
 ___/  _ |/_ </ __/ __ |     the web coz it's
 __/____/____/\__/_/ |_|    hairy ...together"
 B3ta electro-e-email 779 - 16th July 2021
 Mumble this issue into your mask made of wank socks:
 http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue779
 -------------------------------------------------
 : WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS WEEK
   Other than naming their toes after Blazin' Squad
   * IF OLD BOOKS HAD THE TITLES THAT MATCHED
   THEIR ARTWORK - Dutch art genius Klaas
   Leussink writes, "I've started doing it again,
   after a creative hiatus of more than a year
   (except for the occasional repost). I can't be
   sure how long this run will be, but I've got
   some corkers coming up." Fuck it, this can go
   in lads.
 https://www.instagram.com/vintage_covers/
   * SONG AGAINST NORMALISING THINGS - Michael M
   Physics writes, "I wrote a quick song about
   the sort of people who insist on telling you
   to normalise things that just justify and
   reveal their creepily sociopathic tendencies."
   This is great and Michael is a special genius
   with an LP of other anxiety based tunes out
   soon.
 https://twitter.com/michaelmphysics/status/1415636...
   * CENTURIES OF SOUND 1937 - Zuowan writes,
   "Need to escape from 2021 for a few hours?
   Think that's a yes? Here's another mix of
   music and sounds from a single year - this one
   featuring Bing Crosby and the Hindenburg
   Disaster." Why not give it a listen to build
   up to live reenactment of World War 2 in the
   mentions of GB News?
 https://centuriesofsound.com/2021/07/12/1937/
 -------------------------------------------------
 : HEBTRO SPONSORSHIP
   Buy some lovely jeans you sexy people
   Many of our readers have very cold legs, and
   help is at hand as our sponsors Hebtroco have
   invented this technology called "trousers"
   which can cover your lower-limbs and keep them
   toasty warm and prevent you from getting
   arrested by the Old Bill for having your hairy
   knackers exposed in McDonalds. Genius.
 https://hebtro.co/
 -------------------------------------------------
 : FESSHOLE
   Your confessions fessed up for cheapo lols
   Each week we ask you to piss in a bucket and
   we serve up the best as shareable content
   soup:
   * SEXY - 'I once accidentally texted "I'm
   upstairs, I'm naked and I'm horny" to a man
   interested in buying a lawnmower I had
   advertised.'
   * IRISH - "I'm an Irish speaker in a very
   loyalist part of Norn Iron. Back in uni I used
   to write to my local council anonymously and
   request government documents be translated to
   Irish which they had to do. As the only Irish
   speaker in the area they came to me. Basically
   paid for my Uni."
   * PLAYSTATION - "The publisher of the PS2 game
   I was working on threatened to pull funding if
   the game didn't maintain a steady 30fps. It
   ran at 20 at best. We couldn't optimise it any
   more so eventually just wrote some code that
   added 10 to the FPS counter. They were happy,
   game shipped on time."
   Join the 157,000 people who should know
   better. Honestly that's a frightening amount
   of people, for a project we only started on a
   whim. Please stop following and writing such
   great entries. Thank you.
 https://twitter.com/fesshole
 -------------------------------------------------
 : SITES IN BRIEF
   Content from some other cunts on the internet
   * THIS IS FUN ACTUALLY - Can you tell the
   movie from the poster designed by a neural
   network? It's no Saul-Bass-O-Matic, instead
   churning out your typical AI mush, but it does
   make you realise just how little information
   you actually need to recognise an image.
 https://canyouguess.art
   * THE SEEDS OF DOOM - The truth about the
   mystery seed deliveries last year, jaw
   dropping that the obvious question wasn't
   asked. TL;DR: people had ordered the seeds but
   had forgotten. Much like all those dildos you
   ordered in 1978.
 https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2021/0...
   * BLINK AT YOUR WEBCAM - Look at this website
   with your webcam on, and it changes slightly
   every time you blink. It's quite a
   disconcerting effect, and inspires quite a few
   thoughts for potential uses, the least
   tasteful being a Mavis Beacon / Diving Bell
   and the Butterfly mash-up.
 https://realless.glitch.me
   * ECOMMERCE FOR KIDS - if you've ever wondered
   why loads of online businesses are
   fly-by-night and a bit shit it's because of
   'drop shipping' - and now the tech is
   available to kids. Your toddler can become an
   entrepreneur and start selling tat to his
   social network of creche peers in just two
   clicks. Honestly, whether this is a joke or
   not makes no difference these days.
 https://mighty.business/
   * MAKE YOUR IPAD SHIT - install Billy Gate's
   Windows 3.1 on an iPad to relive your youth
   via a terrible operating system.
 https://www.howtogeek.com/739100/how-to-install-wi...
   * LENIN & MCCARTHY - This is quite a long read
   about McCartney meeting Lennon for the first
   time with some serious detective work and a
   little reading of the runes. Has anyone's
   lives had such fevered speculation outside of
   religion?
 https://beatlesliverpoollocations.blogspot.com/201...
 -------------------------------------------------
 : FRIDAY GAME
   Airplane meal simulator
   Flight simulators are all well and good, but
   they miss one important aspect of flight -
   horrible airline meals.  Can you throw food
   down your cake hole during turbulence? BTW:
   It's not the most intuitive controls - you
   have to keep the left mouse button held down
   to grab an item, and then move it with
   W/A/S/D.
 https://sheepandram.itch.io/pfs2021
 -------------------------------------------------
 : IMAGE CHALLENGE
   Celebs in space
   Here's the best images from last week:
   * SOOTY IN SPACE - from S4RK
 https://b3ta.com/board/11347198
   * MATT HANCOCK IN SPACE - from Q4Nobody
 https://b3ta.com/board/11347562
   * JUNE WHITFIELD IN SPACE - from Ninj
 https://b3ta.com/board/11347406
   * See all the other images from the 'Celebs in
   space' challenge:
 http://b3ta.com/challenge/celebsinspace/popular
   >> This week: Animal Holidays <<
   Pack your trunks and hoof it to the beach,
   we're sending animals on holiday.
 http://b3ta.com/challenge/animalholidays/popular
 -------------------------------------------------
 : STAR IN NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE
   Free ideas to start you off, prof
   * RATIO'D - The only podcast anyone needs and
   it would do emergency broadcasts to explain
   what everyone was shouting about on Twitter.
   We would almost do this ourselves, other than
   staring into the abyss every day might destroy
   what's left of our sanity. You do it, ok?
   * PETITION - to make the Sports Direct logo
   officially part of the English flag.
   * WEBSITE FEATURE IDEA - show, in real time,
   which bits of text other visitors are
   absent-mindedly highlighting (idea nicked from
   Twitter user @v21)
   Stick your shite in our letterbox:
 https://b3ta.com/mailus/
 -------------------------------------------------
 : PATREON THANKS
   We love all these people. Almost romantically.
   *HEBTROCO* *JAMES O'BRIEN* *KATE* *MARK
  MCCREADIE* *MR PHIL DONNELLY* *SHOWRAT* *SIMON
  JAMES* *STOOBERT*
   24-7 DEATH, ALAN CHARLTON, ALISTAIR, BRIAN
   EELES, CHRIS BLAKENEY, CHRIS CARLINE, CHRIS
   LOCKE, CRISS MORENO, IAN SHEEN, JAIMIE
   VANDENBERGH, MARK ADAMSON, RICHARD BARCLAY,
   SPAZZCAPTAIN, WENDY GOODE, NAT KING COLESLAW,
   ALBERT MARSHMALLOW, DANIEL MUDFORD, CARL DENCH
   Ed Zitron, Eugenie vT, Tom Dolan, Tom Wright,
   lee burnett, Richard Matthias, @mattdawhit,
   Adam Atack, Adam Cooney, Adam Lloyd, Adrian
   Woodfield, Al Davidson, Albion Gray, Andy
   Storrar, Andy Tillett, Andy Webber, Anna,
   Anne-Marie Scott, Ben Watson, Bertram Wooster,
   blossomshed, Carl Morgan, Catherine
   McAllister, Chris Evans, Chris Shaw, Craig
   Tonks, Damien Smith, Dan Stott, Daniel Brown,
   Dave Nattriss, Dave Tickle, David Ault, David
   Catley, David Gardiner, David King, David
   Mills, Derek Law, Dominic Haigh, Emma Lay,
   Eric von Borstel, Faith H. Martin, Fiona
   James, Fraser Lewry, Gaynor Clarkson, Gia
   Milinovich, Greg Neilson, Gus Nicol, Iain,
   Iain Brassington, Iain Fuller, Iain Ruxton,
   Ian Beveridge, Ivan Kelly, James Donnelly,
   James Kerry-Barnard, Jane Baker, Jason
   Stewart, Jerry Quartley, Jim Dabell, Jim
   Frayling, Jim MacArthur, Jim Woodward, Joe
   McNally, Joe Simmonds, John Faragher, John
   Foster, John Hammersley, John Matthews, Jude
   Evans, Jm McNven, Kate Devlin, Kev Adams,
   Konrad Petrusewicz, Martin Beer, Martin
   Holloway, Martin Peache, matsimpsk, Matt
   Buchanan, Matt Drewry, Matthew Collinge,
   Matthew Forman, Matthew Morris, Matthew
   Wilkes, midnightrambler, mil jamieson, Neil de
   Carteret, Nick Ross, OBiW4N SHiNOBi, oliver
   bewes, Paul Cherry, Paul Smith, Paul
   Westerman, Peter Ashtray, Peter Coombe, peter
   wouda, Philip Kinchington, pookong, Rich Pope,
   Richard Beckett, Rob Mahon, Rob Vincent,
   Robbie Lesiuk, Ross Carter, RossOverThere,
   Saleem Ahmad, Scott S. Kramer, sean casely,
   Simon Cowan, Simon Holmes, Simon McDougall,
   Simon waterfall, Stephen Waller, Steve
   Anglesey, Steven Smith, Stuart Ashen, Tim
   Jokl, Tim Mouncer, Tim Weaver, Tom Crick, Tom
   Rees-Williams, Tom Ryan, TownsendsPublisher,
   Wil Hadden, Will Goulden, AuntieSash
   Hazlewood, Byron Geoffrey Farrow, Chef Twat,
   Chris Gough, Chris Whitworth, Craig Turner,
   Daniel Chote, Fergus McKay, fourstar, Geoff
   Tidey, Geoffrey Balme, Graham Licence, James
   Macinnes, John Higgs, Jonty Wareing, Mick
   Curtis, Rhys Wynne, Rob Affleck, Chris
   Saunders, George Preston, James O'Malley,
   Martin Davies, Mike Middleton, Bex Cook,
   Hannah Chubb, Ben Ward, James Pearson, Shane
   McHugh, Stevey Garland, Ciarn R, Craig
   Liddell, Helen Gaskell, Christopher Orr, Will
   Moody, Nick Morgan, Ben Brice, David Green,
   Justin Brett, Louise Allen, Robin, Gavin
   Tommey, Stuart Richards, Tobie Fysh, Pete,
   Carl Mesner Lyons, Chris Johnson, Emma Sykes,
   Jan Spielhoff, Mike Congreve, Sean Flanagan,
   Tom Freke, Sam Anderson, Jess Baker, Adam
   Beardwood, David Stark, Julie Brumlik,
   Alastair Dodd, Alexandre Strube, Andrew
   Robinson, Andy Candler, Connor Parslow, Craig
   Naples, Daniel Moeller, Duncan STrickland,
   Harry, Irene Semanchuk, Joseph Mulvaney,
   Michael Kitt, Nicky Hewgill, Paul Topping,
   peter royal, Richard Speed, Sentient Meatbag,
   Tim Beachy, Dominic Le Garsmeur, Mark Benson,
   Danny Kodicek, Deny Coughlan, Nick Kent, Russ
   Anderson, Adam Kaczmarek, Andrea Vail, Andy
   Shirling, Ben Chapman, ben cowell-thomas, Ben
   Groom, Ben Sugden, Cat Conner, Centuries of
   Sound, Claire Allen, Claire Zolkwer, Darren
   John Harris, Dave The Hammer Parry, David
   Bond, David Ellinor, Daz Wright, Emily Payne,
   Emma Nicol, FuzzyFreaks, Gary Sharp, Gwyn
   Fisher, Hugh Noble, Iain M Barker, Ilya
   olak-Anti, Jennifer Moquin, Jim Lucking, John
   M, Jon Bounds, Lee Ball, Louis E, Lyra Jay,
   Marc Lindberg, mark madgwick, Matt Carr,
   Michael Bryan, Mr Flibble, Neil Ives, Nick,
   Nigel Ford, Oli, Paul Bayfield, Paul Slade,
   Peter Wood, Phil Barns, Rachel Tougas, Richard
   Abraham, Richard Midwinter, Robert Purkis,
   Robert Simpson, Rohan, Sam Brown, Seirian
   Hanner, Sham Courtney, Simon Lumb, Stephen
   McAuley, Stewart C. Russell, Stphane,
   Swedemason, Ted Bowyer, Thepfy, Tim Polglase,
   Tom Clark, Tony East, wigglywigglyworm, Adam
   Tickner, Al Napp, Andrew Harris, Bobod, Chris
   Ward, Jace Otting, James Meers, John
   Griffiths, Paul Mancini, Rob Potter, Tanya
   Kant, Victoria Wood, Graham Freeman, Caroline
   Kahn, Matt.
   EDITORIAL THANKS: Monkeon & Matt Round
   additional links; HappyToast for image
   challenge help; and Dr Dunno for extra
   support. Proofing by Kat E.
   And thank you to newish Patreons Ben Rout, Tim
   Clarke, Simon Balch, Clemence Saussez, Derek
   Colley. Martin Pritchard, Stephanie Wissinger,
   Dion Ashton and Paul Blanchard. Thanks to EVEN
   NEWER ONES: Fadgebadger, Mark (Mavis), Joshua
   Rackstraw, Mike Stringer, Eliot Beer, Harri
   Bionic, Chris Lindley, Stuart B, Jon Morris
   Smith, Daniel Malbon, James Heaver and Phil
   Lovell. And further thanks to newer ones: Ben
   Oliver, James Wise, Claire Turner, Omnipiss,
   Lindsay Mclaughlin, Mellyfish, Simon Edwards,
   Dave Wong & Stafford Lawrence. NEWEST -
   special love to NEW PATREON Phillip Spowart.
   NEW NEWSEST - extra love love love to si
   Jobling & Daniel Calvin. And bonus new love to
   Douglas Pennant, Roy Santos & Will Thompson.
   We love you.
   And do please donate as you get occasional
   "bonus" content. Maybe.
 https://www.patreon.com/b3ta

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