we love the web email us go to messageboard newsletter archive home NEWSLETTER: "NEWSLETTER 664?! WE DEMAND A RECOUNT!" next issue » « previous issue "NEWSLETTER 664?! WE DEMAND A RECOUNT!" This Week: * SNOPES - B3ta's special mention! Yay! * BOOK - How I Created Katie Hopkins by Adolf Hitler * FRIDAY GAME - it returns! ------------------------------------------------- ________ ____ __ ___ ____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | "We're shaving the yak, ___/ _ |/_ > P.C. hipsta << Did you catch the #HipsterCop thing on Twitter - essential a policeman with a very fashionable beard was photographed at an anti-austerity protest. Driverchris was quick-thinking enough to turn the whole thing into a fantastic tumblr cartoon: this is the fuzz that doesn't want to harsh your buzz. http://pchipsta.tumblr.com/ >> How I Created Katie Hopkins by Adolf Hitler << An extraordinary short book has been written by Barry Sausages and for three days he's given you an exclusive offer. You can download it for free (on Sat or Sun) on Amazon for your Kindle app. Worth looking at for the superb cover alone. http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00XLR2Z1... >> Nile Rodgers & Stephen Hawkings Collaborate << Giveover7 writes, "Stephen Hawking at Glastonbury Festival? Leaked photos of him and Nile Rodgers in the studio? You guessed it! The two legends of music and brainy stuff have teamed up to make the sure-fire album of the year. Here is the never-before-seen TV advert for the upcoming Nile & Steve duets album, released summer 2015." https://youtu.be/EjL2MF_nKg8 >> Sir Ian Bowler on the election << The wonderful and very sexy @natt doing his take on the election. http://www.b3ta.com/links/Sir_Ian_Bowler_on_the_el... ------------------------------------------------ : BLAST FROM THE PAST Old b3ta image has made it onto Snopes Loving this detailed and oh-so-serious debunking of 2009 image from our site, and what's more, it really shows the work that goes into some of the B3ta photoshops. It's a tribute to us all. http://www.snopes.com/disney/films/mickeycheese.as... ------------------------------------------------ : B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE Results from the 'Bad Advice' challenge Last week we asked to see examples of terrible advice, be it movie nonsense or rubbish your parents told you. Your favourites included: * Glass: Vent frustration here. (HappyToast) http://b3ta.com/board/11149211 * Gardening: terrible advice from the strangely familiar old man. (monkeon) http://b3ta.com/board/11150155 * Assembly: ill conceived get together. (inexpressible) http://b3ta.com/board/11149205 All these images, and a load more can be found here: http://b3ta.com/challenge/badadvice/ >> New challenge: Fingers << We really want to see those fingers. Show us your digits, your chocolate fingers, fish fingers and sponge lady fingers, craft plasticine models with your own hands or send us your finger paintings. http://b3ta.com/challenge/fingers/ ------------------------------------------------- FRIEND B3TA ON FACEBOOK We're net survivalists bunkering down for the webpocalpse where the only thing with traffic power is Facebook. Might happen, might not, but FB is the 1,000 pound gollira in the room eating everyone's lunch of mixed mataphors. 'Instant Articles' are the latest thing to make the publishing industry panic, but if we're honest, we'd love a play producing them but only a handful of high profile partners have been selected to have a go. BOO! Interesting times we live in, interesting times. But in the meantime make sure you friend us as that's where we generally stick breaking news so you'll get things earlier than the newsletter. And the odd suspicious looking sausage. http://facebook.com/b3tan ------------------------------------------------- : SITES IN BRIEF Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates * TYPING DRUM MACHINE - This sound toy is awesome and innovative. Type a word and it turns it into a 'sick beat'. 50p says that you end up typing swears into the thing. You naughty sausages, you! http://typedrummer.com/ * THIS STORY WILL MAKE YOU CRY - an interview with Big Bird that make us well-up the sentimental tears of the truly hard-hearted. http://bit.ly/sobby-sobby-tears-tears/ * SATIRE! A complete list of all scientists who have become creationists after studying the evidence. http://bit.ly/richard-dawkins-says-megalolz * SEX AND PROPAGANDA - a fascinting collection of WW2 propaganda. You will click. You will enjoy, comrade. http://www.psywarrior.com/sexandprop2.html * MASSIVE RESOURCE OF FUTURE PREDICTIONS - always good fun this stuff. http://paleofuture.com/ ------------------------------------------------- : GOODBYE USVSTH3M *SOB* Our sister project is no more Lots we could write about this but now is not the time, but your B3ta editor is pleased that the final bit of editorial work he did was to encourage his colleagues to add a wig to the 'Slap Michael Gove' toy after a barrister got in touch with that very request. So together, let's slap Michael Gove, for one last time! (Current count: about 45 Million slaps - we're proud of you Britain.) http://games.usvsth3m.com/slap-michael-gove/ ------------------------------------------------- JOIN B3TA ON TWITTER You know the score. This is the bit of the newsletter where we tell you to follow B3ta on Twitter. For your click you'll get front paged images, the odd link and a reminder once a week to read a newsletter. GOD THAT SOUNDS DULL. It's not! It's fucking fantastic. https://twitter.com/b3ta ------------------------------------------------- : VIDEO SCHMIDEO Insert 'animated gif with sound' joke here * BBC CUNTY LOLS - did a BBC reporter just accidentally call Nigel Farage and the UK Independence Party (UKIP) a "c**t" live on air? HELL YES! It's about 25 seconds in. http://bit.ly/worth-paying-license-fee-twice-for * GAMESHOW - watch two women blow into a tube with a cockroach in it. What a time we live in that you can watch this on your computer. http://gfycat.com/FinishedScratchyFoxhound * DAVID CAMERON DOES A SPIDEY STRUT - artifus writes, "Having just claimed a majority government and after recently seeing Spider-Man 3, David Cameron decides he has only one thing left to do... Strut!" http://www.b3ta.com/links/David_Cameron_does_the_S... * SHIT FLOWS DOWN, MAAN - This just about sums up everything about life. http://bit.ly/official-b3ta-management-techniques * LEROY JENKINS IS TEN - remember this classic meme? OLD MEMES! WE'RE ALL OLD NOW! http://www.b3ta.com/links/Leroy_Jenkins_is_10 ------------------------------------------------- : FRIDAY GAME Don't click this link if you value work Cute numbers game that's a bit like the time-sucking hit 2048. The link goes to a web version but there is also a mobile app available. Kept us clicking for a good twenty minutes then we remembered we had a newsletter to write. (Also like 2048, we wonder if it could be remade with gif uploads.) http://twenty.frenchguys.net/ ------------------------------------------------- : FUNNY NAME CORNER Rude Toy Story card * Iowaseven says, "I live out in the colonies, and found this card for sale. It's an official Hallmark/Pixar product, and I don't think it's for sale in the UK..." http://i.imgur.com/r9S7IgI.jpg * Naming a road after a local historian doesn't sound controversial but... http://bit.ly/yeah-not-the-best-local-council-idea ------------------------------------------------- : WHAT HAPPENED NEXT? Follow-ups on previous stories * CAR CRASH VIDEO - samgrimmett writes, "A few years ago you featured my mate's video in the newsletter. It was about seatbelt safety and ended up going viral and winning "YouTube Ad of the Year" as well as a Bronze Lion at Cannes. First of all - thank you for helping with that! It was so great that the vid hit such a nerve and (hopefully) changed some habits. Second of all, he's made a new thing. This time it's about car seats (but with a similar emotive twist) and I know many of us B3tans are of the age now (or past it, cough cough...) where we might be interested in such a thing." https://www.youtube.com/watch * PISS STORIES - CapnChkn helpfully informs us, "Urine is an excellent fertilizer. I can tell you from personal experience it will burn your plants, as it's chemically rich in Nitrogen. Sterile directly from a healthy bladder, it needs to be diluted 10:1 with water, and is perfectly acceptable to use directly in your garden!" Thanks dude! Happy piss-time! ------------------------------------------------- : GOATS Yep, it's a bonus image challeneg. Huzzah! Last week we had an extra image challenge to celebrate the wonder that is the goat. Why? because we can. You can see the goats in all their glory here: http://b3ta.com/challenge/goats/ ------------------------------------------------- Friends: [email protected] Bastards: [email protected] ------------------------------------------------- THANKS: This issue was written by Rob Manuel with David Stevenson. Stuff sent in by colmcq2 Fluffster, tits, monkeyboyalpha, notoolsovernight, Chicken rhythm, Fluffster & zacherynuk. Image challenge by Happy Toast. ------------------------------------------------- 'Frenemy' b3ta on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/b3tan ------------------------------------------------- TOP TIP: Lose weight by eating less and exercising next issue » « previous issue Newsletter We run a free weekly B3TA email reporting on the coolest stuff on the net. _____________________ [ go ] -------------------- THIS WEEKS HEADLINES -------------------- * TYPE-IN MAGAZINE - LAUNCHED FOR YOUR FINGERS * AI SLOP - GET READY TO OINK FOR IT, PIGGIES * GET WELL SOON - WISHING WELL TO DAVE BAGPUSS READ LATEST ISSUE archive