we love the web email us go to messageboard newsletter archive home NEWSLETTER: TERRY PRATCHETT RIP. SO LONG AND THANKS FOR ALL THE FISH :( next issue » « previous issue This Week: * EUROVISION - meets waffles * QUESTION OF THE WEEK - it's back! * EXPLOSIONS - 'Unnecessary' explosions! ------------------------------------------------- ________ ____ __ ___ ____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | "We're saving the web ___/ _ |/_ > This week: Housemates From Hell III << McChinaman writes, "I once had a flatmate who was so lazy he had a fungus growing in a cup in his bedroom - it was white and whispy so he nicknamed it "Albert". Tell us your tale of living with the disturbed, the odd, the fragile and the downright filthy." Contribute NOW: http://www.b3ta.com/questions/housematesIII/ ------------------------------------------------- : NEW ICONS Yep, pixels for your messageboard profiles You asked for new icons and you've GOT them - Forklift by Bloop, Kim Jong-un by Monkeon, Shamrock & Skull by Q4nobody. If you'd like them on your account then donate now. http://b3ta.com/features/appeal/ ------------------------------------------------- : SITES IN BRIEF Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates * LUKE HAINES RAGS ON NOEL GALLAGHER - Genius, "Wonderwall is so dad-rock that Fathers for Justice should use it as an anthem." It's a brit-pop war! http://goo.gl/vASNXL * "I GHOSTWROTE JULIAN ASSANGE'S AUTOBIOGRAPHY" A long, compelling, fascinating portrait of a flawed man. If you've got Pocket or some reader like that, pop it on that, as it'll take an hour or two. http://www.lrb.co.uk/v36/n05/andrew-ohagan/ghostin... * WHEN ROCK 'N' ROLL LOOMED LARGE OVER THE SUNSET STRIP - a forgotten artform that we barely knew about - gone. http://goo.gl/q2HNwL * KINDLE COVER DISASTERS - just because you CAN self-publish doesn't mean you SHOULD. http://kindlecoverdisasters.tumblr.com/ * UNNECESSARY EXPLOSIONS - quite why we've never done this as an image challenge is because we're idiots. http://imgur.com/gallery/DyT20 * CHUCK JONES' RULES FOR WRITING ROAD RUNNER CARTOONS - this style guide is ALL style. http://goo.gl/CdLJwB ------------------------------------------------- : VIDEO SCHMIDEO Photos that move with audio accompaniment * FATHER HEARING SILENCE FOR THE FIRST TIME - hey we're all old bastards reading this yeah? You'll understand. http://www.b3ta.com/links/1282955 * EARLY CGI ON TOMORROW'S WORLD - fascinating and reminds us we should go on a Tomorrow's World binge on the BBC Archive, once the kids are in bed tonight. http://www.b3ta.com/links/Early_CGI_Tomorrows_Worl... * GORDON RAMSEY'S CRISPY PANCAKES - some neat editing makes this the funniest thing you'll watch on YouTube today. http://www.b3ta.com/links/Gordon_Ramsays_Crispy_Pa... * INTERVIEW WITH APPLE'S TOP ENGINEERS - gripping behind-the-scenes footages of people who've worked with Ive and Cook. http://www.b3ta.com/links/interview_with_one_of_th... * HOW TO CONVERT A DOG INTO A POLICE DOG - with this one simple trick that the cops don't want you to know. http://www.b3ta.com/links/1284864 ------------------------------------------------- : FUNNY NAME CORNER Loads of this fucking shit this week * B.J. HARDICK - he's a chiropractor and deals with er... bones. (Thanks clivepenfold) http://www.hardickchiropractic.com/index.php/about... * UPDATED LIST OF REAL PEOPLE WITH FUNNY NAMES OF LINKEDIN - thanks to mikeyb77 for this frankly amazing research. Jayant Shitole Tamara Wanker Ufuk Tuna Fanny De Cock Gaye Kunt Long Wang Garth Brownsword Wide Flange Truman Hardon * AND FINALLY ONE WE'LL MAKE YOU CLICK THROUGH FOR - thanks to T-Bag for this. http://www.nuffieldhealth.com/consultants/busch-c ------------------------------------------------- : FEATURING THE RETURN OF THE PHALLIC LOGO AWARDS! Special digital government edition MysteriousFinger writes, "I spotted a phallic logo you might like to feature." You are not wrong. http://goo.gl/J6lxCh ------------------------------------------------- : B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE Results from the 'Combine classic art' challenge Last week we raided the art galleries and mashed up the Old Masters. Your favourites included: * Odd Job: Magritte’s hidden love of Bond . (just Dubya not so rubbery) http://b3ta.com/board/11138584 * Last Supper: Rowdy crowd at Hopper’s Diner (VicBrown) http://b3ta.com/board/11138397 * Poke: God checks out his creation. (Ya What?) http://b3ta.com/board/11138375 All these images, and a load more can be found here: http://b3ta.com/challenge/combineoldart/ >> New challenge: Cats in Film << We're doing cats in films this week. Recast classic movies with our feline friends and rewrite award-winning screenplays from a cat's perspective. Bonus points for filming your own cat and winning an Oscar.. http://b3ta.com/challenge/catfilms/ ------------------------------------------------- : WHAT HAPPENED NEXT? Follow-ups on previous stories. * WE GOT AN ANGRY EMAIL ABOUT DRUM MACHINES - Rodney writes, "your bit on the drum machine you punted for was a piece of shit. Truthfully it wasn't the bit but the existence of those fucking machines that pisses me off. "There is no fucking machine ever built that can reproduce the sounds a live drummer makes and that is for starters. If you think a bit you'll come up with a gazillion other reasons why they should be banned & sold only in Moscow or Iraq." Er... drum machines were invented in 1959, so we suspect that ship has sailed. * B3TA GETS MENTIONED IN A BOOK - Charles Seife writes, "I've been reading b3ta on and off since the late 90s... since before Rickrolling replaced goatse-ing, and before badgers were associated in any way with mushrooms. "I'm writing because I've got a book out this week that makes a mention or two of b3ta in it, and the b3tards might be interested. You can check it out here: http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/067002608... ------------------------------------------------- Hello: [email protected] Unhello: [email protected] ------------------------------------------------- Follow @b3ta on Twitter and win a leopard: https://twitter.com/b3ta ------------------------------------------------- THANKS: This issue was written by Rob Manuel with David Stevenson. Stuff sent in by artifus, robneymcplum, HappyToast, Dawn Of The Bread, Mehitabel_Itrang, fred zeppelin, terror_onion, smaggers. Subjlolz via HappyToast. Image challenge by HappyToast. The new three is team QOTW. Subjlols via mr-lizard. Hello to KKKKkat, who suggested we bring the QOTW back. ------------------------------------------------- TOP TIP: Politics students: Feel like a REAL politician whilst at university by claiming for another student loan on a second hall of residence. next issue » « previous issue Newsletter We run a free weekly B3TA email reporting on the coolest stuff on the net. _____________________ [ go ] -------------------- THIS WEEKS HEADLINES -------------------- * TYPE-IN MAGAZINE - LAUNCHED FOR YOUR FINGERS * AI SLOP - GET READY TO OINK FOR IT, PIGGIES * GET WELL SOON - WISHING WELL TO DAVE BAGPUSS READ LATEST ISSUE archive