we love the web email us go to messageboard newsletter archive home NEWSLETTER: DISAPPOINTING TIM BERNERS-LEE SINCE 2001 next issue » « previous issue This Week: * CREEPY - On Facebook how to be * COCA COLA - Doesn't love Hitler * ROBOTS - 93 years of robo-film ------------------------------------------------- ________ ____ __ ___ ____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | "It's not a newsletter ___/ _ |/_ > Sponsor B3ta << Want this space? Then talk to us. http://b3ta.com/mailus/ ------------------------------------------------- : WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS WEEK Making is not an euphemism >> Seagull Skytrails << "I used After Effects on some footage of a couple of seagulls," claims poochngeez. But we know the truth: Oceanic birds are tracing sinister sky-runes above our slumbering seaside towns. And somewhere a deep bell is tolling. http://www.b3ta.com/links/Seagull_Skytrails >> Make hazelnut yoghurt with Elton John's brother << "Elton John's brother John John teaches you how to make hazlenut yoghurt," explains Pig Face Turnip. It's classic John John. http://www.b3ta.com/links/1271772/ >> A novel in 27 hours! << "I am doing something very foolish this year," apologises CTS. "I'm attempting to write a novel in just 27 hours. And in exchange for donations, you can add creative input to the finished thing - then I'll flog it online for more charity cash." It's for Red Nose Day. http://my.rednoseday.com/sponsor/27hournovella ------------------------------------------------- : LONDON BASH LONDON BASH LONDON BASH << There's another B3ta Bash. Fray Bentos explains: "Planning another London summer bash as last year's was such a fucking mess. Tabs wetting himself, Spesh & Herbs waking up in a park etc." Sign up: http://www.b3ta.com/calendar/event/25474 ------------------------------------------------- : USVSTH3M How long before it's USVSTH£M? Think about it >> Dead cat wins at Twitter << "I bought 90k Twitter followers for my sadly lamented dead cat for £25," boasts Ginger Fuhrer Rob Manuel. For anyone who thinks follower count matters. (Also featuring the very same cat that's been on the front page of B3ta for about 10 years, which we used to refer to as 'the official B3ta cat') http://t.co/m653TU2t5z >> Would you like a job? << We are recruiting, both a Javascripty/HTML5 dev and a graphicy person to make things look nice. Sound like you? Read the full spec: http://t.co/Y2pYoLwNet ------------------------------------------------ : B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE Results from the 'In Drawers' challenge Last week you wanted to empty out the contents of your drawers and go all Etsy on them. Your favourites included: * Who: The drawers in the Tardis are packed. (monkeon) http://b3ta.com/board/11132070 * Go for your Pun: with Big John Wayne (Ya What?) http://b3ta.com/board/11131801 * Witch Drawer?: found footage in the kitchen. (monkeon) http://b3ta.com/board/11131494 All these images, and a load more can be found here: http://b3ta.com/challenge/indrawers/ >> New challenge: Lies! << This week we want you to tell porkies. Come up with a massive fib and show us it in pictorial form. Or if you can't think of your own, illustrate the terrible untruths people have tricked you with.. http://b3ta.com/challenge/lies/ ------------------------------------------------- : SITES IN BRIEF Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates * WHAT HAPPENS AFTER WEBSITES? Some interesting thoughts on the post-website future of media from @jwherrman. http://www.theawl.com/2015/02/the-next-internet-is... * COCA COLA TWEETS MEIN KAMPF - Coca Cola put out a Twitter toy that let you format your own text. The result? For a couple of hours on Tuesday morning, its Twitter feed was broadcasting big chunks of Hitler’s autobiography, albeit in the form of a smiling banana or a cat playing a drum kit. http://t.co/QMAA7DU757 * CARDS AGAINST HUMANITY now have a private island. Hoorah! http://cah.tumblr.com/post/110099027175/ * HOW TO BE CREEPY ON FACEBOOK - the best thing we've read this week and we've read everything. http://goo.gl/5NZbKQ * RUBBISH OPTICAL ILLUSIONS - this caught us the other night and really tickled us. Then today it didn't make us laugh at all. WHAT IS FUNNY? WHO ARE WE? http://optillusions.tumblr.com/ ------------------------------------------------- : VIDEO SCHMIDEO Like TV but inside your computer made of pixels * 'SPECDRUM' 80s DOC - Magical documentary about two guys who lived the Thatcherite dream of escaping a squat by making a drum machine. Massively watchable 80s business doc about making the 'Specdrum' - that at moments feels like a 'Comic Strip Presents.'. http://youtu.be/RVLOeINDN-Q * 93 YEARS OF ROBOTS ON FILM - a quick history lesson on how we've attempted to visualise humanities successors come the singularity. http://www.b3ta.com/links/93_years_of_robots_on_fi... * CRAZY RUSSIAN HACKER - this week we've become oddly obsessed with this YouTube star who isn't even Russian and puts up endless, "you've been doing X wrong lifehack videos" - we'd like to confirm that at least one of his tips works - we just got a biro working again by heating the tip with a lighter. https://www.youtube.com/user/CrazyRussianHacker * 1974 STUNTMAN - it's the low-key and clearly safety-last nature of this footage that makes it compelling. Also the news that there's a load of clips on the BFI site? That's something to nerd out on later. http://goo.gl/FdfrjI * PIXEL-ART SIMPSONS INTRO - You might not have enjoyed The Simpsons for 15 years but you WILL like this pixel art tribute. We watched this thinking this was an actual Simpsons production, as occasionally they get artists in to direct this bit of the show, e.g. Banksy in 2010, but no, this is purely a fan project. http://www.b3ta.com/links/Paul_Robertsons_Simpsons... * AMUSING SWEDISH MAGICIAN - Carl-Einar Häckner might keep you happily diverted for 5 mins as he does horrible things to a banana. http://www.b3ta.com/links/Amusing_swedish_magician ------------------------------------------------- : STAR IN NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE Make something cool and tell us about it. If you are in it then people will see your stuff. Things we'd really like to see include * Some kind of joke about Graham Massey and Sting making a record together with the punchline "police state" except imagine it's funny. * Oh god - some fucker is opening a chocolate bar cafe in shoreditch where you can pet baby llamas. I'm dreading the thinkpieces. If we get angry enough about it it will become true. * Upper middle-class listicle pitch: 27 problems only a buy-to-let landlord would understand. Send contributions via the mail form. http://www.b3ta.com/mailus/ BTW: If you've sent something in that hasn't been featured then don't be put off - we look at everything you send us. ------------------------------------------------- Vote for change: [email protected] Spoil ballot : [email protected] ------------------------------------------------- Follow @b3ta on Twitter and win a leopard: https://twitter.com/b3ta ------------------------------------------------- THANKS: This issue was written by Rob Manuel with David Stevenson. Stuff sent in by HappyToast, sinisterduck, Pesky Young Scamp and Tusk. Image challenge by Fraser Lewry. Mike Trinder is QOTW bloke. Subjlols via sandettie light vessel automatic Tip via Baying cyber-mob ------------------------------------------------- TOP TIP: Before including links to other websites in your online newsletter consider making sure they work. next issue » « previous issue Newsletter We run a free weekly B3TA email reporting on the coolest stuff on the net. _____________________ [ go ] -------------------- THIS WEEKS HEADLINES -------------------- * TYPE-IN MAGAZINE - LAUNCHED FOR YOUR FINGERS * AI SLOP - GET READY TO OINK FOR IT, PIGGIES * GET WELL SOON - WISHING WELL TO DAVE BAGPUSS READ LATEST ISSUE archive