we love the web email us go to messageboard newsletter archive home NEWSLETTER: SMEAGOL IN THE STREETS, GOLLUM IN THE SHEETS next issue » « previous issue This Week: * GAME OF THRONES - as Mousetrap * 90s MEMES - The Internet Citizenship Test * DATA - The most Spurious Correlations ------------------------------------------------- ________ ____ __ ___ ____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | "Have the ___/ _ |/_ > Mousetrap Game of Thrones << "It had been bothering me," confesses brianftang, "So I put this together." http://www.b3ta.com/links/1176716 >> War Worm << "It's like War Horse," informs Pig Face Turnip. "But with a glow worm (which were apparently used by soldiers in WW1 trenches to light letters). Fact." http://www.b3ta.com/links/War_Worm >> Oblivious << "This is my daughter's final piece for her media btech coursework," writes Black Moon. "Give her some views, it'll make her happy." Warning: SLENDERMAN. http://www.b3ta.com/links/Oblivious ------------------------------------------------- : USVSTH3M We make these things and some of them are good * The Internet Citizenship Test - Think you know about the 90s internet? A real treat for old school b3tans who read the newsletter back in the day here. http://games.usvsth3m.com/internet-citizenship-tes... * What Does Your PIN Number Say About You? - Our numerologically-accurate and non-sinister game will leave you enlightened. http://games.usvsth3m.com/what-does-your-pin-numbe... * Who’s Your Celebrity Birthday Double? - Tell us when you were born and we’ll work it out! http://games.usvsth3m.com/your-celebrity-birthday-... * Eurosong Generator - Still piing for Eurovision? Now you can live the magic forever. FOREVER! Muhahahahaha! What, are you still here? http://games.usvsth3m.com/eurosong/ ------------------------------------------------- : QUESTION OF THE WEEK Jobs - Expectations vs Reality Nothing like starting a job to find out it's not quite what was sold to you at interview: http://b3ta.com/questions/jobexpectation/ * DECORATOR - "This is not my story, but I was there, so I feel I can tell it. After living in a shared house for some time, we were finally leaving. The landlord had decided to do some redecorating, and on our last day he turned up with his decorator. After going around the house and discussing all the things he wanted doing, with the decorator nodding and making notes, he then left to let him get on with it. As soon as the door closed, the decorator flipped his bucket over, sat down on it, took out an impressively large spliff and fired it up, then looked around at us and said: 'So. Any of you lot know anything about painting and decorating? 'Cos I fucking don't!'" (moon monkey) * POLICE - "Years ago, when I was at college in Hendon, it was all 'pillar of the community' and 'chicks'll dig the uniform'. Not once did they mention that I might get punched by a nonce." (Joy Division Oven Gloves) * PAPERBOY - "Expectation: riding a chopper down a suburban street, throwing papers into people's mailboxes, trying not to smash their windows, then racing around a BMX track. Reality: Trudging around in the rain listening to S'Express on your walkman, taunting dogs through letterboxes and trying not to get fingered by old men in dressing gowns." (browser) >> This Week: NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCES II << Missed death and destruction by the slightest of margins? Walked away with only soiled undies? Tell us about your brush with death: http://b3ta.com/questions/neardeathexperiences2/ ------------------------------------------------- : SITES IN BRIEF Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates >> Spurious things that correlate << Amazing collection of data that form a similar-shaped graph with no obvious link between them. For example: Age of Miss America, graphed against number of people murdered with steam and hot objects. http://tylervigen.com/ >> Mynoise.net - Ambient noise generator << Choose a style of ambient noise then fuck about with the sliders to create a perfect background sound. You will not regret it. Unless you want to dance. http://mynoise.net/noiseMachines.php >> BBC Micro Elite. In your browser. << Cult space trading game Elite, in the comfort and convenience of your favourite browser window? You're welcome. http://bbc.godbolt.org/ ------------------------------------------------- : VIDEO SCHMIDEO >> Exorcism goes... unexpectedly << Shenanigans, as the evil spirits are on their way to being cast out. http://www.b3ta.com/links/African_Exorcism_goes_un... >> Alternate Ending to Tyrion's speech << If you like Game of Thrones you will probably like this, but you might also like a minor (spoilers) alert too. http://www.b3ta.com/links/Game_of_Thrones_LOLZ >> Dancing bats << This is all of the lovely. If we had just one wish? A million more wishes. But the wish after that would be for more of this. http://www.b3ta.com/links/Dancing_bats ------------------------------------------------- : B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE Results from the First versions challenge Last week we wanted you to show us the early prototypes of everyday objects. Your favourites included: * SPECTRUM: Everything a home computer programmer could ever need (brown-wings) http://b3ta.com/board/11076866 * CERN: The original design scientists used to trap the mouse particle (DrCJBoduma) http://b3ta.com/board/11077067 * PHOTOSHOP: Early photo manipulation, so good you’d think it was real (monkeon) http://b3ta.com/board/11077687 All these images, and so many more can be found here: http://b3ta.com/challenge/First-versions/ >> New challenge: Comedy History << This week's image challenge is to show us the history of comedy. The birth of lols and the stuff people laughed at before Fail vids. http://b3ta.com/challenge/comedyhistory/ ------------------------------------------------- WHAT HAPPENED NEXT: * SINGLE-USE PLASTIC - "My blog started off as a 40-day challenge where myself and a friend gave up plastic for lent," explains skeltonator. "You guys newslettered it, but it continues beyond that and I thought you might be interested to see how it's going. Thank-you." http://singleuseplastic.co.uk/blog/ ------------------------------------------------- THANKS: This issue was written by Rob Manuel with David Stevenson. Stuff sent in by sinisterduck, RompaStompa, teh_raab, barryheadwound, h3donist and evil_andy. Image challenge by Fraser Lewry. Mike Trinder is QOTW bloke. ------------------------------------------------- TOP TIP: Send nice emails to yourself to make up for the shit you usually get. (RebelWithoutApplause) next issue » « previous issue Newsletter We run a free weekly B3TA email reporting on the coolest stuff on the net. _____________________ [ go ] -------------------- THIS WEEKS HEADLINES -------------------- * TYPE-IN MAGAZINE - LAUNCHED FOR YOUR FINGERS * AI SLOP - GET READY TO OINK FOR IT, PIGGIES * GET WELL SOON - WISHING WELL TO DAVE BAGPUSS READ LATEST ISSUE archive