we love the web email us go to messageboard newsletter archive home NEWSLETTER: ISSUE 118: "LIES YOUR PARENTS TOLD" next issue » « previous issue This Week: * INTERVIEW - Wes Cherry speaks * QUIZ - Celebrity Dustbin * WEIRDO - From flabby to freak ------------------------------------------------- ________ ____ __ ___ ____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | ___/ _ |/_ > Interview with a legend << Wes Cherry. Never heard of him? Well, he's only the creator of the most played computer game ever written. Solitaire for Windows, installed on hundreds of millions of machines World-wide. Responsible for more lost man hours than booze, fags and sex on the photocopier. He's a legend, we salute him, we're not worthy, now we give you the one, the only... Wes Cherry! http://www.b3ta.com/interview/solitaire/ >> Celebrity dustbin << The world was crying out for a web quiz based on celebrity dustbin raiding. Cometh the hour, cometh the man. Brian Mung: We bask again in the warm glow of your unique genius. http://www.brianmung.com/celebritepoubelle.htm >> Dancing Bunnyman << Hip-hop. Bunnies. Humiliation. This one's got it all. Elisse Hamu has made an extremely good animation about someone not dancing very well at all. http://www.crimsonskycreations.com/bunnyman8.html >> The Thing that waits << "Stupid and pointless animations are my cup of tea," writes Lazarus. You make a lovely cuppa, say we. http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view.php >> Surrealist claymation spectacular << Kvetching plasticine-wrangling genius Threeheadedanalbaby and friend produced this rather fine specimen. Like Wallace & Gromit directed by David Cronenberg. http://home.earthlink.net/~chase900/jewish512.wmv ------------------------------------------------- : B3TA RADIO Did your parents ever lie to you? This week we're after the fibs that your mum and dad told you when you were a gullible child. Read this stuff - it's fantastic. http://www.b3ta.com/questions/liesyourparentstoldy... Also; Noted web raconteur and wit ScaryDuck will be joining us in the studio for a chat. You can learn more about b3ta Radio and how to tune in here: http://b3ta.com/features/b3taradio/ ------------------------------------------------- : SITES IN BRIEF Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates. >> From flabby to freak << Last year this chap made a vow to physically transform himself into a vision of masculine beauty. He lost weight, worked out, bought a medallion, shaved his chest and displayed an interesting array of pants in his daily photo journal. Boyz Magazine: You will like this. http://www.johnstonefitness.com/all/front/w.html >> Escape from Neverland << Jacko: His last album was shit. He's not down with the kids anymore, is he? Perhaps this web game will help him out with that. We scored 5. Then got bored. http://www.zooass.com/games/neverland/neverland.sw... >> Ovenready apartment << Is a tinfoil hat not keeping the alien brain lasers out? Take a leaf out of this fellow's book and safeguard your sanity by wrapping every single item in your house with aluminium foil. It took him five days. Can you do better? * http://www.meetluke.com/NxAlbumImageThumbnailView.... >> Airline food photos << About to go on holiday? Worried about the food? See 10,000 photos that explain why air rage exists. http://airlinemeals.net/indexMeals.html >> Harmonica beatbox << The art of good blowjob is 'circular breathing' - to keep blowing whilst inhaling. We'd like this bloke's number. Warning: Big download - but we have a fat pipe. http://memelo.julianors.org/yuri_harmonica.swf >> Powerpoint mum << A woman's advice to her husband, who is about to babysit their child for the first time. It's in the only language men understand: Online animation. http://www.gnjallen.com/daddy.htm >> Ludicrous motorbike << Monster trucks make you look like a real man. Why not convert your motorbike the same way? The answer is here: It will make you look like a tiny wee child, particularly since it needs stabilisers to stay upright. Jessies. http://www.uq.net.au/~zzlhiess/Big%20Toe.htm >> Photoshopping - no such thing << Photoshopping photoshopping photoshopping Photoshopping photoshopping photoshopping. Adobe says we're not allowed to say this. Hee hee hee. We are so naughty. So sue us already, you big electric cat. http://www.adobe.com/misc/trade.html#photoshop ------------------------------------------------- : THINGS THAT MAKE YOU GO AAHH Bats In Bed Simply the cutest thing we've seen this week. Poorly baby bats tucked up nice and warm in a special bat hospital. http://www.athertontablelands.com/bats/ BTW: What's the cutest thing you've seen on the web recently? Tell us at http://www.b3ta.com/mailus/ ------------------------------------------------- : B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE Results from the Come-Back TV Challenge Each week we run a competition to test your creative skills. We set a challenge and you open Photoshop and mess with our heads. Last week we wanted limp TV vehicles for has-been celebs: http://b3ta.com/challenge/comebacktv/ We asked B3ta boarder 'Sue Denham' to judge the entries - here are her 3 faves. Sue writes - #1 "B&Q's latest recruit - the pathos and sheer desperation evident on this chap's face is a joy to behold. #sniff# (Shatner's Bassoon) http://b3ta.com/board/2601867 #2 "Happy Days - it's probably a good thing Adolf didn't grow old - imagine asking him what he did in the war. (themanwhofellasleep) http://b3ta.com/board/2602109 #3 "Postman Chat - simply perfect. Pat has the concerned-tv-show-host look down, well, pat." (wilesy) http://b3ta.com/board/2608426 >> This Weeks Challenge << This week, a whole bunch of our contributors gave us the suggestion, "Inappropriate Endorsements" http://b3ta.com/challenge/endorsements/ ------------------------------------------------- : WHAT HAPPENED NEXT? Follow-ups on previous stories. * IRC BIBLE HIT - last weeks conversion of the scriptures into AOL-lamer speak has proved rather popular with the blogging community, reaching top 5 in the Blogdex charts. If you missed it then give it a read. http://www.ircbible.destrukto-theater.nl/ * WEEBL TALKS TO M.I.T - Jonti has been asked to give a chat about web comics at a university in Boston. They're flying him over too. Lucky sod. http://www.weebl.jolt.co.uk/ ------------------------------------------------- : STAR IN NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE Make something cool and tell us about it. If you are in it then people will see your stuff. Things we'd really like to see include * TOP TIP TESTING - you don't have to be a web guru to join in with b3ta. Anyone with a camera and a gay turn of phrase could test our tips. Go on. Live a little. * A BULLET WITH OUR NAMES ON IT - if we own it, they can't kill us do you see? * AN MP3 OF SHEMALE GENERATION - by the eponymous Gallic transsexual pop trio. There's only a ten-second preview on their site and we want to play it on the radio. http://www.shemale-legroupe.com/ Send contributions to http://www.b3ta.com/mailus/ BTW: If you've sent something in that hasn't been featured then don't be put off - we look at everything you send us. ------------------------------------------------- Subscribe: [email protected] Unsubscribe: [email protected] ------------------------------------------------- THANKS: This issue was edited by Rob Manuel with David Stevenson. Links sent in by TomARSE, Vidi, Hapax Legomena & Murray (of Commercial Breaks & Beats fame, and oddly enough, Tracey "Fooking Amateurs" MacLeod's favourite website.) Top Tippery by Jada. Additional linkage by Fraser Lewry. Board research by Fnord. Image challenge handled by Mike Trinder. Proofing by the sexual b4ta conquistadors. (73266) ------------------------------------------------- TOP TIP: Having trouble cleaning pots and pans? Get some dead leaves from the garden and boil them up for 15 to 20 minutes. Scrub the pan with the leaves and it should come up nice and clean. If not, at least you've made a nourishing soup. next issue » « previous issue Newsletter We run a free weekly B3TA email reporting on the coolest stuff on the net. _____________________ [ go ] -------------------- THIS WEEKS HEADLINES -------------------- * TYPE-IN MAGAZINE - LAUNCHED FOR YOUR FINGERS * AI SLOP - GET READY TO OINK FOR IT, PIGGIES * GET WELL SOON - WISHING WELL TO DAVE BAGPUSS READ LATEST ISSUE archive