__ __ _ _____ _ _ _
| \/ | ___| |_ __ _| ___(_) | |_ ___ _ __
| |\/| |/ _ \ __/ _` | |_ | | | __/ _ \ '__|
| | | | __/ || (_| | _| | | | || __/ |
|_| |_|\___|\__\__,_|_| |_|_|\__\___|_|
community weblog
mightier than the sword
"While there is little evidence that male genitals have evolved as weapons under pre-copulatory sexual selection, it is certainly plausible that male genitalia could function as status signals that affect the likelihood of rivals initiating a fight. To date, however, no study in any animal, including humans, has experimentally modified male genital size to test whether it acts as a signal of fighting ability." Experimental evidence that penis size, height, and body shape influence assessment of male sexual attractiveness and fighting ability in humans (PLOS Biology)
"In the current study, we use 343 computer-generated figures of men to test how male genital size influences the assessment of a male's attractiveness by females, and how males perceive a rival male's attractiveness to females and evaluate his fighting ability."
posted by mittens on Jan 23, 2026 at 4:30 PM
---------------------------
Well that's why there's barriers between urinals of course. It cuts down on the dick fights.
posted by CynicalKnight at 4:58 PM
---------------------------
+1 for the title.
posted by blue shadows at 5:14 PM
---------------------------
Why these findings were published in PLOS instead of PNAS is beyond me.
posted by criticalyeast at 5:18 PM
---------------------------
I was sure it was going to be an Onion article.
Na, still think it's an Onion article.
posted by BlueHorse at 5:19 PM
---------------------------
So one thing that's fun about being a gay man is comparing your penis to your partner's. Not in any serious way, at least not for me, just for fun. But now I don't know what to think. I'm a lover not a fighter baby.
posted by Nelson at 5:31 PM
---------------------------
Yeah, I remember reading a review of some evopsych book probably thirty years ago, where the author was saying that men who cheat more can't help it, it's because they just have bigger balls than other guys. I mean, I was a teenager, and even I instantly saw through this bullshit, lol. "Baby, I can't help it, it's my huge cock and balls! You can't imagine the burden!!"
I mean, I don't know. I'm inclined to think that if there's a correlation between dick size and combativeness it's a negative one, with little-dick guys having more to prove. I don't want to fight a guy with a little dick. He is probably a very angry person, and who knows what he could do? He has nothing to lose!
posted by kittens for breakfast at 5:48 PM
---------------------------
I certainly don't think of mine as a weapon, but as an elegant instrument for a more civilized age.
posted by Greg_Ace at 5:54 PM
---------------------------
In the early days of the internet, stupid online flame wars were sometimes referred to as "dick-size wars." Time is a flat circle, folks.
posted by Halloween Jack at 6:11 PM
---------------------------
Given that we generally don't walk around naked, unlike our distant ancestors, how does any of this work? Excuse me, sir, might you drop your pants so I can assess how frightened I must be in your presence? Nowadays, we are left with the accoutrements of external devices, like massive belt buckles, huge ungainly pickups/cybertrucks, etc., which in many cases adorn those with, ahem, small appendages. There is no irony in referring to some asshole as being a "big dick." Men truly are a sad lot...
posted by njohnson23 at 6:11 PM
---------------------------
So that's why everyone gives me a wide berth at the nudist resort.
posted by ocschwar at 6:16 PM
---------------------------
Metafilter: You can't imagine the burden!!
posted by lalochezia at 6:37 PM
---------------------------
All my female friends assure me it doesn't matter.
posted by Pouteria at 7:20 PM
---------------------------
Why does everybody laugh at my mighty sword?
posted by tspae at 7:21 PM
---------------------------
"We recruited participants using posters and targeted media posts at the Australian National University (ANU), Monash University"
Gonna guess that's a relatively homogenous group culturally and demographically and we should assess results in that light rather that seeing it as innate or evolutionarily determined. Am thinking of the classical Greek/Roman standard that saw large penises as ugly/animal like and unattractive.
posted by i_am_joe's_spleen at 8:23 PM
---------------------------
When she says size doesn't matter, and I cite Aich et al. (2026), is that mansplaining?
posted by Mr.Know-it-some at 8:30 PM
---------------------------
Am thinking of the classical Greek/Roman standard that saw large penises as ugly/animal like and unattractive.
Yeah, that seemed like an obvious rebuttal to me. If your going to argue big dicks are innately, biologically a source of awe and terror, you ought to have a good explanation for the fact that a significant ancient-world civilization's response to a huge cock was to point and laugh. And this was not a small, envy-driven phenomenon! The art and writing of ancient Greece is surprisingly consistent in its message that an exemplar of masculine perfection really ought to have a tiny penis.
posted by jackbishop at 1:48 AM
---------------------------
On the contrary, I think the Greeks sort of prove the point: The well-endowed person was monstrous, a satyr, a barbarian, someone outside the boundary of civilization. Someone, in fact, you did not want to fight.
posted by mittens at 3:39 AM
---------------------------
Anecdotal, but plastic truck-nuts seem to make pickups and SUVs faster and more reckless.
posted by Artful Codger at 6:58 AM
---------------------------
The Greeks were afraid to fight monsters, satyrs and barbarians? Even a superficial reading of Greek history and myth says otherwise. Small dicked Heracles (check out greco-roman statues) didn't hesitate to kill centaurs and satyrs whenever he encountered them.
posted by Alcedinidae at 7:17 AM
---------------------------
I mean I don't want to make some big formal argument here, but if you have to create a mythical hero to kill a monster, then "this thing's differences make it something that must be fought" does seem to follow? (I think my "did not want to fight" above may sound like I mean the opposite of my actual point--rather, the satyr's physical attributes put him on the radar, so to speak, made him fightable in a way I think the study suggests that their respondents would agree with?)
posted by mittens at 7:33 AM
---------------------------
Does this mean the codpiece will making a comeback?
posted by brookeb at 8:39 AM
---------------------------
(also, to dwell on greece a minute...was there any discourse around what women found attractive? that's an actual question, not a gotcha, as i don't think i've ever read anything about the topic?)
posted by mittens at 8:45 AM
---------------------------