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community weblog
A Story About Some Expensive Shit
Police in New Zealand recover a James Bond inspired Fabergé egg pendant six days after the would be thief tried to smuggle the $19K pendant out of the store by swallowing it.
The pendant was retrieved naturally, with no medical intervention, according to NZ police.
posted by NoxAeternum on Dec 06, 2025 at 10:06 AM
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[more inside]
Indeed there was
posted by CynicalKnight at 10:21 AM
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Has The Defector been notified?
posted by JimInSYR at 10:34 AM
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Six days!? This man needs to eat less eggs
posted by saturday_morning at 10:35 AM
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The Defector Defecator
FTFY
posted by caviar2d2 at 10:58 AM
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Strong Christopher Walken/Bruce Willis energy
posted by phooky at 11:19 AM
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The true evil mastermind move, of course, would have been to swallow a replica Faberge egg two days earlier. The fools will never suspect until it is far too late.
posted by phooky at 11:22 AM
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Will they charge the culprit with moving stolen goods?
posted by GenjiandProust at 11:28 AM
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It turns out that the police were indeed going through the motions.
posted by Major Clanger at 11:38 AM
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swallow a replica Faberge egg two days earlier
But - unbeknownst to them - the two eggs were swapped bedorehand to benefit the real mastermind... The cop who sifted the poop.
posted by CynicalKnight at 11:41 AM
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It's pretty, but I've seen better 8/10
posted by waving at 12:21 PM
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A moving story. That thief may never look at some inspirational memes the same way again.
"This too shall pass. It might pass like a kidney stone. But it will pass."
There has to be a joke in there re tainted goods but I can't be arsed.
posted by Hardcore Poser at 12:45 PM
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literally an inside job.
posted by clavdivs at 1:19 PM
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Six days!? This man needs to eat less eggs
One more day would have been putting the turd in Saturday.
posted by Calvin and the Duplicators at 4:52 PM
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...a joke in there re tainted goods...
Worth 33,000 New Zealand dollar ($19,000) Maybe not now??
I imagine the value of all them have dropped with that particular story attached. I can't see anyone bragging that they are wearing a limited edition Faberge egg octopus surprise that was made famous by the guy pooping one out.
One of fifty in a limited edition--but this one has real provenance!
posted by BlueHorse at 6:04 PM
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Now that's a turd worth polishing.
posted by flabdablet at 9:08 PM
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I can't help picturing the "item" dropping into that toilet made of solid gold. It would ring like a bell.
posted by kinnakeet at 7:49 AM
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World's worst advent calendar.
posted by Quindar Beep at 8:07 AM
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obligatory
(possibly NSFW art at link)
posted by the sobsister at 8:30 AM
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Fela Kuti's "Expensive Shit"
posted by DJZouke at 5:32 AM
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Note to self: if I ever embark on a life of crime, I must stay away from Metamucil, bananas, and coffee.
posted by The Ardship of Cambry at 10:21 AM
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