---Donkey Kong Country 2: Diddy's Kong Quest (SNES) Text Dump--- Come and say hello to your old grandpappy Cranky. I'm back by popular demand to offer you my wealth of gameplaying wisdom for this unnecessary sequel. After my starring role in DKC, I thought I'd be the main character this time, not stuck in this gloomy shed! What sort of name is Dixie anyway? In my day, you were lucky to have a name at all! Girl heroes in video games, pah. I can't believe it! The main character should be really muscle-bound and carry a gun, not twirl their hair round! Try all you like, this game will never be as good as DKC, which was rubbish anyway! Just 'cos DKC sold a few lousy copies, I have to be included in another ludicrous adventure! It's the last time, I tell you! I'd have never been kidnapped in my day, not like that fat fool Donkey! I don't even get two screens to stand in! I'm sure K. Rool will have two, so why can't I? Pah! Give up now before the kids realize you're not as popular as Donkey Kong was! Where's Expresso? A clumsy spider and a fat parrot, is that the best they can think of? Look at all this junk in here! Treat my home like a trash can they do! No respect for their elders, that's the trouble... I hate being stuck in this shabby barrel. I want to sit outside like last time! K.Rool is gonna whup your hides this time, whippersnappers! I'd better take over before you embarrass yourselves! Team up? I've never heard such rubbish in my life! When I played, I was on my own. I had no fancy backup! Shouldn't Dixie just be a token female princess waiting to be rescued, instead of a main character? I was hoping for more frames this time, but no! Don't let old Cranky do anything. Just give him some third rate stand frames! I don't know why I help you so much. You don't appreciate me! I bet this here Killer Instinct game is rubbish too! It hasn't got me in it, so it must be! I'd have collected far more tokens than that by now! What's wrong, got holes in your pockets? I hope you bought "Cranky Kong Country" last year. I was the one who made it so successful, not that lumbering Donkey! Diddy, I thought you were a cheap character in DKC, but Dixie is even worse! It should be me on my own, that it should! You must be really desperate to read all this! Having trouble on your miserable, boring quest are we? You're looking a bit fat there, kid! Look at me, I'm at my physical peak. I could show you a thing or two! You think your fancy graphics and sound will work again! I think not. You'll be lucky to sell 10 copies this time! Did you notice in DKC that my tune sounded like the title tune? How dare they! I'm worth two different tunes at least! I'd sort out old K.Rool for you real quick, but I'd be spoiling the limited fun you're trying to get out of this shoddy product! Look! They've even taken my chair from me. It's disgusting how they treat old video game heroes these days... Haven't sold a single thing in weeks! If this junk was out of one of my games, the customers would be begging to get in! I knew it! You've come to beg for my help again, haven't you! Well, I'm not going to tell you anything this time! Have you been to see the other members of the Kong family? They're not as useful as me of course, but they might be able to help. For just five bucks, you can buy my memoirs! What a dynamic and exciting life I've led. You'll be lucky to be in half as many games as I've been! I knew you'd be back. Can't finish this ridiculous quest without my help, can you? Howdy, young 'uns! Gather round and I'll give you some much needed advice! I'll box your ears if you don't listen this time! Need more help do we? Pah! If I tell you much more, I might as well play the game for you! Back so soon? I thought you'd complete at least another level before you came crying to me! Is that nasty fat crocodile beating you? Listen up, and I'll share my amazing knowledge! Oh, it's you again. I thought it might be a real video game hero... Surprise, surprise. Well if it isn't the so called video game heroes! I hope I'm getting paid for all my help! Come on in! Have yourselves a look 'round and buy some of this trash, why don't you? You spend as much time in here as I do! See, you're back again! Everybody likes old Cranky. I bet my ugly, old wife doesn't get half as many visits! Don't you ever knock? I know you're desperate for help, but remember your manners next time! What do you want this time? Go ahead, test my amazing knowledge! Here's what I've got to offer. Feast yer eyes on my menu! Take a look at this lot! Enough talk, let's see your tokens! I reckon you should spend all your tokens here. Here's a fraction of my enviable knowledge! This stuff is cheap at half the price! Gaze in awe, as you appreciate my knowledge! O.K, which of these would you like? Pick a subject! I know everything about this game! I can recommend the really expensive ones, actually. I'm not giving this stuff away you know! You must be joking! You'll never have enough for that! You'll have to play better to buy that, sonny! My knowledge doesn't come that cheap! You'd better stick to the free ones, whippersnapper. Hey! If you ain't got any tokens, you can buzz off! Keep yer grubby hands off if you can't afford it! Find some more tokens, you useless monkey! You ain't got enough tokens for that, cheapskate! Not enough? Well, get lost then. It's not a charity! I want more tokens for this! That's not enough. I've got new frames to pay for y'know! That one is too good for you. That's enough help for now. I need some rest. Now, go and sort out those stupid crocodiles! Yawn! I'm getting tired. Go away and don't disturb me again! It should be real easy for you now! Even you can finish this silly game now! I'm off to spend my tokens! Time for a couple of games on this here Killer Instinct. I don't want to help you too much. Guess I'd better tidy this miserable dump up a bit. When you need more advice, which you will, I might help again, if you're lucky. Now, buzz off and let me work on my new game design. Don't come back without a sackful of tokens! I gotta go now, my wife is visiting any moment! Remember, I'm the most useful of the Kongs, and the cheapest! Don't be surprised if I'm gone next time. I'll be in a real game! Try using your team throw at the start. Below the letter K, you'll find a reward if you avoid the danger. Jump for joy when crossing the longest horizontal rope. I reckon the door at the bottom of the tall wall looks flimsy to me. Those big blue goons ain't guarding that huge stack of barrels for nuthin'! Knock 'em off and get up there! A hook, step and jump is all you need to look for near the two dragonflies above you. Below the first seal, you'll find something worth getting your fur burnt for. Is it my eyes, or is there just one chest at the start? Take it easy, let the rhino use his head to get you through the first half. A trek towards the Klobber with the spider is worth looking up. Right is right, right at the start. Those two hook throwing villains opposite each other are protecting something. I'm sure of it! Find the only Krockhead stepping stone and you'll find your buddy Rambi. With only the dragonflies left, I'm sure you'll be alright. When nearing the top, the ability to walk on water reveals all. It might be dark and spooky, but don't let it get you down immediately. Are you up to it at the start? After four spinning barrels, all that's left is left itself. An eight-legged friend would go halfway to helping you here. Don't be in a hurry to enter Rambi's room. Think things over. The fruit is always fresher on the other side of the thorns. Jump to it! It's his track, so watch the Kremling car carefully. He might be down, but he's on his way out. A charge down the last straight with Rambi will ensure a crushing victory. Start with a hook, stick and jumps, and you're bonus bound! Things are starting to look up on this level. Here's a tip that I think's great, the door is by the Klampon and so is the crate. Finishing this level is cause for celebration. By all means go over the top. Where you find one, there may be two. To the left of the letter 'O' is where you should go. K. Rool is no fool. He has got two big blue goons watching his horde near half-way. After the start, a long jump and then a high jump will win you more than just a gold medal. Brave an early attack of barrels and their hidden treasure is yours. Watch very carefully at the end. There's something going down that could give you a new life. I ain't helping you with this one. It's up to you to start looking yourself. I've left a couple of animal buddies for you in here, but it's left for you to find. them. When cannon balls are raining down on you, I suggest you look for a way past who's responsible. Just before halfway, take time to look back at what you've done. After the slope with the letter 'N', press right as you fall and you'll have a ball. Down may be out, but right picks you up. The bananas point the way. The end is not the end. Well, well, well, if it isn't our trainee hero! I didn't expect you to find this place, sonny. You must have got lucky. Now that you're here, I'd better tell you about it. This here's the Kremling's 'LOST WORLD', and that big crocodile head in the middle is where you need to get to if you're going to finish this silly game properly. But to get there, you have to beat Kaptain K. Rool and complete all the bonus levels as well, a task I'm sure is well beyond a whippersnapper like you! I don't know why I'm doing this, but here are some ridiculously cheap hints for this world, which I'm sure you'll be needing as well. I knew you'd do it, Diddy m'boy, but how could you fail having learned all you know from old Cranky here? You've rescued that lazy grandson of mine, and dumped K.Rool in his own filthy swamp. Not bad for a novice! Of course, if I'd been playing, I'd have made sure that K.Rool never tries a cheap trick like this again! I reckon I'd have found all the Kremkoins and completed the so called 'Lost World'. Oh well, can't expect everything from your first game, can we? One more thing, how many of my special Video Game Hero Coins did you find? A real player, such as myself, would have found plenty, I'm sure. Let's see how well you did, eh? Well, I've got a second screen, and about time too. Now, shut up everyone while I read the eagerly awaited results of my prestigious Video Game Hero Awards..... Hmmm... not too good at finding my coins, are you sonny? You might be a hero, but you've got some catching up to do, yes siree! Well, at least you're on the podium. Who knows? If you keep on looking, you could be an even bigger hero! Hey, not bad for a young 'un! 'course, you're going to have to find a few more if you want to be as big a hero as I was! I'm not afraid to admit it, Diddy m'boy. Even I'm wrong occasionally. You're as big a hero as they come. You must take after me and Donkey. Well Done! If you want to look at your limited progress on this screen, press the top left and right buttons while you are on any of the map screens. Now buzz off and see if you can find some more of my coins, which I very much doubt you will. Back to see me again, eh, sonny? Let's see if you've improved your hero status, shall we? Nope! You ain't improved any since your last visit. Stop wasting time here, and find my coins, you useless bums! Hey! What are you waiting for? There ain't no secret stuff hidden here, sonny! There is, however, a couple of special features on the game selection page, though I'm sure they're of little use. To find these silly options, press down lots of times, but if I were you, I wouldn't bother. Now switch this cartridge off and let me get some sleep. I reckon I've earned it! N-n-nice going k-kid! I-I reckon only a t-t-true video g-game hero would h-have f-f-finished it all! L-let's get out of t-this miserable d-dump, and g-get back t-t-to D-Donkey K-K-Kong Island! Give them a big hand folks! Good evening, I'm Swanky Kong and you're tonight's contestants on my Bonanza! It's easy to play! Just pick a game and you're away! What do you do for a living? Video game heroes you say? Well, that's great! Hit the button and let's play! Step right up! It's your lucky day, here on my Bonus Bonanza! I know you're gonna win the Big One! Don't be nervous. We all want you to win, don't we folks? That's right, they're all behind you! Right this way! I've got three wonderful games just for you! Take your time and make your choice! Hi there, Kongs! I've got some amazing star prizes just waiting to be won! Welcome back! You've joined us as the Kongs are about to choose their game. No help from the audience, please. Come on, let's have a round of applause for them! It's great to see you back! I wish you could win everything. I really do! Hard luck folks, you haven't got enough to play that game. Too bad, I really wanted you to play that game. I'm really sorry, but you need more tokens. Awww, that's a real shame. You must collect some more. Not enough I'm afraid. Y'know what tokens make? Prizes! Go and fetch some more tokens and come back next week. See you next week! You've been great contestants! Didn't they do well! I hope we'll see you back next week! Until the next time, here on Swanky's Bonus Bonanza! Everyone is a winner here! I'll have even better prizes next time! If you fancy a game, you know my name! Awww...I'm afraid that's not correct. Sorry, that's not what I'm looking for. Good try, but that's wrong. Oh no....I thought you'd know that! That's not quite right. Better luck next time! I'm sorry, but that's not the answer I've got here. Close, but not close enough I'm afraid. I can't believe how stupid you...er, I mean, hard luck. Well done! You got them all right! We have a winner here tonight! Nice going guys. Here's your prize! I knew you'd win this time! All correct, folks! Didn't they do well? Well played! Here, you deserve this! Alllll-right! The little monkey is a winner! Three out of three, you're pretty good at this! That's correct! Here's the next one... O.K., try this one... Well done! Let's have another... You clever little monkey! Now, listen carefully... Good answer! Here we go again... Yessss! Let's play on... That's what I'm looking for! Next one please... Alright! Onto the next round... What is my name? A. Swanky B. Wonky C. Stinky What is the first enemy that you see in the game? A. A furry rat B. A scaly crocodile C. An ugly earthworm What is the name of this area of the island? A. Gangway Garbage B. Gangland Galleon C. Gangplank Galleon What button do you press to run? A. Button 'B' B. Button 'Y' C. 'Start' button What is the name of the first level in the game? A. Pirate Picnic B. Pirate Panic C. Pirate Punch-up What is the name of the enemy boss who has kidnapped Donkey Kong? A. Kaptain K. Rapp B. Korporal K. Reep C. Kaptain K. Rool In the first level of the game, how many windows did the Kaptain's Kabin have? A. 2 B. 4 C. 6 What is the name of the first rigging level? A. Mainbrace Mayhem B. Rigging Riot C. Ropey Rubbish In the first level of the game, which of these is NOT a background object in the Kaptain's Kabin? A. A sword B. A map C. A gun What is the name of the first lava level on this area of the island? A. Boiler Curfew B. Hot-Head Hop C. Meltdown Mayhem What is the name of this area of the island? A. Crocodile Cauldron B. Alligator Alley C. Crocodile Cove How many times did you have to hit the end of area giant bird to kill him? A. 4 B. 6 C. 10 What colors were the crocodile heads you jumped on in the first lava level? A. Red and Blue B. Blue and Green C. Green and Brown What is an extra lives balloon colored red worth? A. 2 lives B. 1 life C. 5 lives Excluding the end of area boss, how many levels were there on the first area of the island? A. 5 B. 6 C. 4 How many banana bunches would you have to collect to get an extra life? A. 5 B. 10 C. 20 Where did the beetle first appear during the first area of the island? A. Level 1 B. Level 5 C. Level 2 What is the name of Diddy's pony-tailed girlfriend? A. Diddette B. Trixie C. Dixie What can your snake buddy do that is special? A. Jumps very high B. Runs very fast C. Spits eggs What is the name of the level with the angler fish who helps you with his underwater light? A. Torch Tragedy B. Glimmer's Galleon C. Gloomy Galley What is the name of the big muscle-bound crocodile who guards the toll bridge? A. Klaggy B. Klunga C. Klubba How many lives do you start the game with? A. 3 B. 5 C. 17 What button do you press to team up? A. Button 'X' B. Button 'B' C. Button 'A' What is your rhino buddy's name? A. Bambam B. Rambi C. Rambus What is the name of this area of the island? A. Don Quay B. Krem Quay C. Crocodile Cove What is your parrot buddy's name? A. Squawks B. Squeaks C. Flapper How many airplanes hang from the roof in Kong Kollege? A. 1 B. 4 C. 2 What is the name of this area of the island? A. Loony Goonland B. Creepy Crocland C. Krazy Kremland What color is your parrot buddy? A. Red, green and yellow B. Red, black and purple C. Brown, black and white What is the name of the two companies that produced this game and Donkey Kong Country? A. Rave / Crocodile Games B. Kremsoft / Krool Inc. C. Rare / Nintendo What is the name of the first wasp hive level on this area of the island? A. Wasp Hive Horror B. Hornet Hole C. Horrible Hive What is the name of the old lady Kong, who runs Kong Kollege? A. Crocky B. Wrinkly C. Crinkly Which of these items can NOT be found at Klubba's Kiosk? A. Picture of K.Rool B. Oil drum C. Boxing gloves and punchbag What is your snake buddy's name? A. Hisser B. Slithers C. Rattly What color waistcoat does old man Cranky Kong wear in Monkey Museum? A. Red B. Green C. Yellow Which of these enemies have you not seen yet during this area of the island? A. Kutlass the swordsman B. Zinger the wasp C. Cat o' 9 tails What is the name of this area of the island? A. Gloomy Gulch B. Fearsome Forest C. Spooky Heights How many little wasps did the end of area giant wasp break up into? A. 3 B. 5 C. 7 What is the name of the trendy, surfing Kong, who operates his barrel flights? A. Cranky B. Chunky C. Funky What is the name of the forest level with the blowing wind in it? A. Breezy Battle B. Windy Woods C. Gusty Glade On the Kremling island map, how many small wasps hover around the wasp hives? A. 2 B. 3 C. 4 What is the name of the Kremling island that you are on? A. Crocodile Dump B. Crocodile Isle C. Crocodile Country Which of these is NOT the name of an area of the island you have played? A. Crocodile Cauldron B. Krazy Kremland C. Crocodile Canyon What is your swordfish buddy's name? A. Enguarde B. Swordy C. Stabber How many world map globes are there on the shelves in Kong Kollege? A. 2 B. 1 C. 0 What is the name of this area of the island? A. K. Rool's Castle B. K. Rool's Keep C. K. Rappy Keep What is the name of old man Kong, who lives in a Monkey Museum? A. Creaky B. Beardy C. Cranky Which of these enemies also appeared in Donkey Kong Country? A. Neek the rat B. Zinger the wasp C. Kannon the crocodile What is the name of the castle level with the rising floor? A. Castle Crush B. Tragic Tower C. K. Rool's Krush How many animal buddies can you ride in the game? A. 4 B. 6 C. 5 What is the name of the flying ghost coat Kremling who throws objects at you? A. Flapper B. Kloak C. Black Jacket What is your spider buddy's name? A. Spinner B. Squitter C. Eight Eyes How many desks are there in Kong Kollege? A. 5 B. 3 C. 6 How many different baddies do you think are in the game? A. 40 B. 30 C. 20 Lookin' good, dudes! I'm Funky the main monkey, and my new Funky's Flights can take you anywhere on Crocodile Isle, provided you've already checked it out of course! Cruise on over to the barrel man, and ride the skies! Everything is cool guys. You're lookin' ready to ride and catch some clouds! All flights cleared, dudes. Choose and cruise! Jump in my jet n' jive Clive! Awesome playing, Kongs! Go get that K. Rool. He just ain't cool! Wicked! She's all tuned up and ready to go! Pick it and kick it, Kongs! You're A-Okay! Drop in on the other Kongs, dudes. We're all here to help you guys! Way cool! Pick a flight and you're outta sight! Sorry, dudes. That one costs more to run than you've got! Uncool! That's costly cruisin' and you ain't in the picture guys! Tough break, Kongs. She's too cool for your pocket! What a bummer, eh? Try to find a few more tokens, y'know! Aw no! Looks like you're gonna need to score some more to tour! Not enough, man! I got a new surfboard to pay for! Catch y' later, dudes! Take it easy, Kongs! Stay loose, guys! Check me out again, huh? Remember, Funky's the Monkey! Call again, good buddies! I fly 24 hours y'know! I think I'll catch some rays now! Cool! She's all yours dudes. Catch y'later! Hello, dearies. I'm Mrs. Wrinkly Kong, Headmistress here at Kong Kollege. I'm available to teach courses on how to play this game, or you can just pop in when you want to save your little old game. Now then, how can I help you? When you see Kaptain K.Rool, can you ask him if he has done his homework? Hurry along! School is nearly finished! You need to study a little more if you're going to beat the Kremlings! Those naughty crocodiles! All they want to learn is how to fight and squash monkeys, Tsk! Have you been to see my husband Cranky? He complains a little, but he does know everything about this island. Come on in and sit down, children. I'm sure all that running around has made you tired. Well! Just look at those sums those Kremlings have done. Disgraceful! You're looking a little weary dear. Would you like to save your game? I hope you're better behaved than those reptiles. Why, I even caught one sharpening his sword in class yesterday! Oh dearie me! That's not quite enough, is it? My, that is a lot isn't it? Try to find some more tokens. Sorry dear, but I've got to pay for a new blackboard. Oh dear, I'm afraid you'll need a few more for that. Education is not cheap these days. I'm sure you'll find a few more tokens if you look! Those nasty Kremlings must have all the tokens! Go and grab some and come back later. Goodbye, dearies. Don't be a stranger now. I'll be here if you need me. Be careful now, Kongs. Take care, dearies. Try to make it to my next class. Good luck, children. Come back if you've got any problems now. A gold coin with a bunch of bananas on it, collect these and spend them in the various Kong Family locations found throughout the island. Press the 'B' Button to swim. Pressing Up or Down on the directional keypad while swimming or floating will affect the speed that you sink or swim. Jump on the target to finish the level. If you jump from a sufficient height, you will win the displayed prize. Throw Krow's eggs back at him. He won't like it! Press and hold the 'A' button to power him up, then release it for his Supercharge. Use this to destroy enemies and break open hidden doors! When you have both characters, press the 'A' button to team up. You can throw your partner to defeat enemies and reach inaccessible features. Press A again to split up. To make your snake buddy jump in mid air, walk off an edge and press the jump button as he falls. Press and hold the 'Y' button when you are on the ropes and you will climb up and down them faster than normal. Collect all four of these on a level to earn an extra life! When you hit Kleever, quickly get across to the other side before he gets angry. To create a web platform, press the 'A' button or either of the top 'L' and 'R' buttons. Press the button again to stop the web and form a platform in the desired position. For every bonus level you complete, you will get one of these. Collect a lot and you can use them at Klubba's Kiosk. Jump in these to transform into the animal shown on the side of the barrel. If you hold the jump button down while jumping on an enemy, you will bounce higher and further than normal. There are three types. Red is worth 1 life, Green is worth 2 lives and the rare Blue balloon is worth 3 lives! When Kudgel lands, he'll shake the screen and immobilize you! Be careful! Press the 'A' button to power him up, then release it to activate his Superjump. Use this to access normally unreachable areas. A very large coin with 'DK' on it, each level has one, cunningly hidden by Cranky. Collect these to increase your status as a video game hero. Doors are hidden on the sides of walls and can be broken into by throwing objects at them or using your animal buddies. Destroy the small Zinger and his drones quickly, or they'll reappear after a while. Press 'Y' to roll off an edge, then press 'B' to jump as you fall. You can increase your jumping distance this way. Walls that look solid could contain secret passages that you can use to access hidden areas or shortcuts. Jump on the different colored Mini-Neckys to gain the necessary objects to fight the ghost of Krow. Each level has between one and three of these. Complete all the bonuses on a level to gain 1%. Finding these aren't necessary but they will be useful if you can. Items become visible when you touch them. Press the 'A' button to power him up, then release it for his Superstab. Use this to break open hidden doors! All but one of my lessons are useful in your quest. Make sure you have plenty of lives! Now 'ear this, landlubbers! Me name is Klubba an' to cross me bridge is gonna cost yer many pieces o' eight! An' if yers don't pay up, I'll run yer through like the scurvy dogs ye are, A-harrr! It costs 15 Kremkoins to cross over, mateys. Splice me mainbrace, it's the monkeys! I hope yers got enough booty this time, or ye'll walk the plank! Shiver me timbers! Where's me loot? Cos if I don't get none, ye don't cross over, mateys! Scurvy chimps ahoy! C'mon ye yellowbellies. Try an' cross Klubba's bridge without payin. I dare ye! Let's see yer dubloons, ye mangy apes! A-harrrr! 'Tis the flea ridden gorillas again! Pay the toll, or ye'll suffer a plenty, I promise ye! Avast there! Touch me horde o' gold 'ere, an' I'll slice ye in two! Stop right there ye scummy swabs! Step on me toll bridge an' I'll throw ye overboard! It's twenty lashes wi' the cat o' nine tails for ye if I don't get me booty this time, y' filthy apes! Ye'll 'ave t' find me more n' that to pass! That's not enough, y' banana- scoffing, scummy landlubbers! Ye'll taste me club if ye don't get some more! Try that again an' it's Davy Jones's locker f' ye! A-harrh! What's wrong with ye? Our bonus rooms must be too hard for y' flea bitten chimps t' find. Har! Har! Har! Y'must be jokin if I'm gonna let ye across fer that lousy loot! Get lost and fetch me lots more treasure, y' scurvy dogs! I'll wrap me club around yer moth eaten heads if yer don't pay every last one! Beat it, y' mangy apes! Don't come back, y' scurvy dogs! Get lost, landlubbers! Come back when you want a beating. Har! Har! Come back and face me, yellow bellied dogs! You'll never beat us Kremlings this time! I'll be waiting right 'ere, y' flea bitten monkeys! I hope I never see you again! Step this way, friends! I've polished the bridge just for ye! Ahoy there me monkey mateys! Fare ye well on this fine day! Kap'n K.Rool treats us rotten. I hope yer scupper his plans! 'Tis me ape mates! The barrel is all yours! If yers get into any trouble, Klubba 'ere will 'elp ye out! Thanks for the booty. Yer me best mateys now! Over here, Kongs! The Kremling 'Lost World' awaits ye! Feel free t' use me barrel when ye like, mateys! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Game Text: (c) 1995 Nintendo/Rare Document: (c) 2008 Vinny Hamilton (VHamilton002@gmail.com) Version History: Version 1.0 (8/21/08)