* * * * *
                                        
  Notes on an overheard conversation while sitting in a booth at a restaurant
                         eating lunch on Christmas Eve
                                        
“While I was cleaning the house, I was harmonizing with Lilly Nelson—”

“Who? Lilly Nelson?”

“Who do you think I mentioned?”

“Lilly Nelson.”

“Do you think I said Lilly Nelson?”

“That's what I heard—Lilly Nelson.”

“So who is Lilly Nelson?”

“That's what I asked you—who is Lilly Nelson?”

“Who do you think it is?”

“I don't know. It could very well be a singer I've never heard of. You never
heard of Front 242 [1], or Siouxsie and the Banshees [2].”

“Do you think I might have said Willy Nelson?”

“For all I know, she could have been the daughter of Ricky Nelson [3]. Like
Kelly Osbourne.”

“Who?”

“Kelly Osbourne [4]. Daughter of Ozzy Osbourne [5], eater of bats [6].”

“But I didn't say Lilly Nelson.”

“But she could be a singer!”

“…”

“Let's see … I'm looking up Lilly Nelson.”

“Is this tunnel vision a programmer thing? You can't think outside the box
realize I said ‘Willy Nelson?’”

“Tunnel vision? I'm the one willing to conceed she's a singer.”

“Must control … fist of death … [7]”

“Ah! She's an actress [8]!”

“But not a singer.”

“That's not out of the question. Eddie Murphy [9]. William Shatner [10].
Bruce Willis. They all had ‘singing’ careers.”

“Bruce Willis?”

“Bruce Willis. The Return of Bruno [11], 1987.”

“Why do you know that?”

“The same reason why I know Leonard Nimoy had a hit in the 60s [12].”

“But what does that have to do with Lilly Nelson? She's an actress, not a
singer.”

“Because being an actress doesn't preclude a singing career.”

“If she has a singing career, I'm checking out of this universe.”

[1] http://www.front242.com/
[2] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Siouxsie_and_the_Banshees
[3] http://www.ricknelson.com/
[4] http://www.kellyosbourne.com/
[5] http://www.ozzy.com/
[6] http://www.complex.com/music/2012/05/the-40-most-ratchet-music-rumors/ozzy-osbourne-bit-bat
[7] http://dilbert.com/strips/comic/2001-07-15/
[8] http://www.lillynelsonactress.com/
[9] https://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B0033XCP4K/conmanlaborat-20
[10] https://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B005HMUPYW/conmanlaborat-20
[11] https://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00000DWTE/conmanlaborat-20
[12] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XC73PHdQX04

Email Sean Conner at sean@conman.org

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