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                            The Tiger Woods of Jazz
                                        
“You know what the world needs now?” asked Spring. [1] 

I paused in what I was working on and turned to her. “Love, true love?” 

“Someone to be the Tiger Woods [2] of jazz,” she said. 

“Um, Spring. I hate to say this, but most jazz musicians are already black,”
I said. 

“No no no, not that.” 

“Oh, then some uncoordinated white guy wearing polyester playing jazz?” 

“No silly,” she said, punching me on the shoulder. “Somebody to take stuffy
old tight-ass dusty jazz and make it fun for everybody, the way Tiger Woods
did for stuffy old tight-ass dusty golf.” 

“Ah.” And I was englightened. 

[1] http://www.springdew.com/
[2] http://www.tigerwoods.com/

Email author at sean@conman.org

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