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Date: Sat, 10 Jun 2000 19:17:26 -0400 (EDT)
From: Daniel Harris <dannyboy@dannyboy.eyep.net>
Reply-To: dannyboy@subdimension.com
To: FreeBSD-gnats-submit@freebsd.org
Subject: Semi-overhaul docs.html
X-Send-Pr-Version: 3.2

>Number:         19186
>Category:       docs
>Synopsis:       Semi-overhaul docs.html
>Confidential:   no
>Severity:       non-critical
>Priority:       low
>Responsible:    freebsd-doc
>State:          closed
>Quarter:        
>Keywords:       
>Date-Required:  
>Class:          doc-bug
>Submitter-Id:   current-users
>Arrival-Date:   Sat Jun 10 16:20:01 PDT 2000
>Closed-Date:    Mon Jun 12 11:49:46 PDT 2000
>Last-Modified:  Mon Jun 12 11:50:03 PDT 2000
>Originator:     Daniel Harris
>Release:        FreeBSD 4.0-STABLE i386
>Organization:
>Environment:

	docs.sgml rev 1.82

>Description:

	Various fixes, nits, etc. Executive Summary:

	Standardize: Remove "This is" type verbiage.
	Tweak FAQ blurb.
	Fix run-on under Additional Resources.
	Add trailing slash to link to Wolfram Schneider's page.	
	Hinrich Eilts's manpage viewer seems to have vanished, remove dead link.
	A couple was/were fixes.

>How-To-Repeat:

	

>Fix:

	(drumroll)


--- docs.sgml.orig	Sat Jun 10 19:03:42 2000
+++ docs.sgml	Sat Jun 10 19:02:56 2000
@@ -32,13 +32,13 @@
 
     <h2><a href="news/press.html">FreeBSD in the Press</a></h2>
 
-    <p>The press about FreeBSD.</p>
+    <p>Articles in the press about FreeBSD.</p>
     
     <a name="y2kbug"></a>
 
     <h2><a href="y2kbug.html">Year 2000 Compatibility</a></h2>
     
-    <p>This is the FreeBSD project's current statement about its Year 2000
+    <p>The FreeBSD project's current statement about its Year 2000
       compatibility.</p>
     
     <a name="newsletter"></a>
@@ -53,7 +53,7 @@
     <h2><a href="news/qnewsletter.html">FreeBSD Real-Quick (TM) Newsletter
 	(RQN)</a></h2>
     
-    <p>A monthly (sometimes bi-weekly) newsletter containing recent
+    <p>A monthly (sometimes bi-weekly) newsletter announcing recent
       developments in the FreeBSD arena. Subscribe to freebsd-announce to
       receive this newsletter via e-mail.</p>
 
@@ -61,7 +61,7 @@
 
     <h2><a href="handbook/index.html">The FreeBSD Handbook</a></h2>
     
-    <p>This is an evolving, comprehensive on-line resource for FreeBSD users.
+    <p>An evolving, comprehensive on-line resource for FreeBSD users.
       Please address comments and contributions to <a
 	href="mailto:freebsd-doc@FreeBSD.ORG"><tt>&lt;freebsd-doc@FreeBSD.ORG&gt;</tt></a>.</p>
       
@@ -72,9 +72,8 @@
 
     <h2><a href="FAQ/FAQ.html">Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)</a></h2>
     
-    <p>If you have a question, chances are that someone else has the same
-      question.  The most common of these have been compiled here in a brief
-      question-answer format.</p>
+    <p>If you have a question, chances are that someone else has had it too.
+    The most common of these questions (and answers) have been compiled here.</p>
 
     <p>&i.new; We now offer a <a href="&base/ru/FAQ/">Russian translation</a>
       and a <a href="&base/zh/FAQ/">Chinese translation</a> of the FAQ.</p>
@@ -86,7 +85,7 @@
 
     <h2><a href="tutorials/">Tutorials</a></h2>
     
-    <p>Here lie assorted documents on various aspects of FreeBSD, FreeBSD
+    <p>Assorted documents about various aspects of FreeBSD, FreeBSD
       software, and hardware.  If you have comments or would like to
       contribute a document, please contact us at <a
 	href="mailto:freebsd-doc@FreeBSD.ORG">freebsd-doc@FreeBSD.org</a>.</p>
@@ -95,9 +94,9 @@
 
     <h2>Additional Resources</h2>
     
-    <p>www.FreeBSD.org is not the only place to get information on FreeBSD and
-      various independent efforts have also produced a great deal of useful
-      information on FreeBSD:</p>
+    <p>www.FreeBSD.org is not the only place to get information on FreeBSD;
+    various independent efforts have also produced a great deal of useful
+    information about FreeBSD.</p>
 
     <ul>
       <li><p><a href="mailto:mckusick@mckusick.com">Kirk McKusick</a>, one
@@ -139,7 +138,7 @@
 
       <li><p><a
 	    href="http://www.linuxdoc.org/HOWTO/mini/Linux+FreeBSD.html">The
-	    Linux+FreeBSD mini-HOWTO</a> - this document describes how to use
+	    Linux+FreeBSD mini-HOWTO</a> describes how to use
 	  Linux and FreeBSD on the same system.  It introduces FreeBSD and
 	  discusses how the two operating systems can cooperate, e.g. by
 	  sharing swap space.</p>
@@ -221,13 +220,7 @@
     -->
     
     <p>This service is provided courtesy of <a
-	href="http://wolfram.schneider.org">Wolfram Schneider</a>.  There
-      is <a
-	href="http://late5.e-technik.uni-erlangen.de/cgi-bin/bsddocquery.pl">another
-	script</a> available with the manual pages for FreeBSD 2.0 and XFree86
-      release 3.1, courtesy of <a
-	href="http://late5.e-technik.uni-erlangen.de/user/eilts.html">Hinrich
-	Eilts</a>.</p>
+	href="http://wolfram.schneider.org/">Wolfram Schneider</a>.</p>
 
       <a name="44doc"></a>
       
@@ -236,7 +229,7 @@
     <p>If you like reading BSD manuals online, here is a hypertext version of
       the 4.4BSD documents from <a
 	href="file:/usr/share/doc">/usr/share/doc</a>, where you would find
-      the documents on a FreeBSD machine (if the doc distribution was
+      the documents on a FreeBSD machine (if the doc distribution were
       installed).</p>
       
       <a name="info"></a>
@@ -246,7 +239,7 @@
     <p>If you like reading FreeBSD Info documents online, here is a hypertext
       version of the Info documents from <a
 	href="file:/usr/share/info">/usr/share/info</a>, where you would find
-      the Info documents on a FreeBSD machine (if the info distribution was
+      the Info documents on a FreeBSD machine (if the info distribution were
       installed).</p>
 
       <a name="source"></a>
@@ -270,7 +263,7 @@
     
     <h2><a href="http://www.freebsdzine.org/">FreeBSD ezine</a></h2>
 
-    <p>The FreeBSD 'zine is a monthly collection of easy to read (we hope)
+    <p>A monthly collection of easy to read (we hope)
       articles written by FreeBSD users and administrators just like you.</p>
     
     <p>Like FreeBSD itself, this documentation is the product of a volunteer


>Release-Note:
>Audit-Trail:

From: Mark Ovens <mark@ukug.uk.freebsd.org>
To: dannyboy@subdimension.com
Cc: FreeBSD-gnats-submit@freebsd.org
Subject: Re: docs/19186: Semi-overhaul docs.html
Date: Sun, 11 Jun 2000 00:33:11 +0100

 On Sat, Jun 10, 2000 at 07:17:26PM -0400, Daniel Harris wrote:
 > 
 
 [snip]
 
 > @@ -236,7 +229,7 @@
 >      <p>If you like reading BSD manuals online, here is a hypertext version of
 >        the 4.4BSD documents from <a
 >  	href="file:/usr/share/doc">/usr/share/doc</a>, where you would find
 > -      the documents on a FreeBSD machine (if the doc distribution was
 > +      the documents on a FreeBSD machine (if the doc distribution were
 >        installed).</p>
 >        
 >        <a name="info"></a>
 > @@ -246,7 +239,7 @@
 >      <p>If you like reading FreeBSD Info documents online, here is a hypertext
 >        version of the Info documents from <a
 >  	href="file:/usr/share/info">/usr/share/info</a>, where you would find
 > -      the Info documents on a FreeBSD machine (if the info distribution was
 > +      the Info documents on a FreeBSD machine (if the info distribution were
 >        installed).</p>
 >  
 >        <a name="source"></a>
 
 Surely "was" is correct here? "distribution" is singular, you wouldn't
 say "if it were installed" would you?
 
 -- 
         Want a lean, mean, computing machine?
 	Get rid of that excess FAT - install FreeBSD
 ________________________________________________________________
       FreeBSD - The Power To Serve http://www.freebsd.org
       My Webpage http://ukug.uk.freebsd.org/~mark/
 mailto:mark@ukug.uk.freebsd.org             http://www.radan.com
 
 

From: Daniel Harris <dannyboy@subdimension.com>
To: Mark Ovens <mark@dogma.freebsd-uk.eu.org>
Cc: FreeBSD-gnats-submit@freebsd.org
Subject: Re: docs/19186: Semi-overhaul docs.html
Date: Sat, 10 Jun 2000 19:46:21 -0400

 Mark Ovens wrote:
 > 
 > Surely "was" is correct here? "distribution" is singular, you wouldn't
 > say "if it were installed" would you?
 
 Yes, I would.  It being installed is a hypothetical -- not necessarily
 true.  It's in the subjunctive.  Were is not only the past plural form
 of "to be" -- it's also the past subjunctive.
 
 -- 
 Daniel Harris
 dannyboy@subdimension.com
 

From: Daniel Harris <dannyboy@subdimension.com>
To: Mark Ovens <mark@dogma.freebsd-uk.eu.org>
Cc: FreeBSD-gnats-submit@freebsd.org
Subject: Re: docs/19186: Semi-overhaul docs.html
Date: Sat, 10 Jun 2000 19:46:31 -0400

 Mark Ovens wrote:
 > 
 > On Sat, Jun 10, 2000 at 07:17:26PM -0400, Daniel Harris wrote:
 > >
 > 
 > [snip]
 > 
 > > @@ -236,7 +229,7 @@
 > >      <p>If you like reading BSD manuals online, here is a hypertext version of
 > >        the 4.4BSD documents from <a
 > >       href="file:/usr/share/doc">/usr/share/doc</a>, where you would find
 > > -      the documents on a FreeBSD machine (if the doc distribution was
 > > +      the documents on a FreeBSD machine (if the doc distribution were
 > >        installed).</p>
 > >
 > >        <a name="info"></a>
 > > @@ -246,7 +239,7 @@
 > >      <p>If you like reading FreeBSD Info documents online, here is a hypertext
 > >        version of the Info documents from <a
 > >       href="file:/usr/share/info">/usr/share/info</a>, where you would find
 > > -      the Info documents on a FreeBSD machine (if the info distribution was
 > > +      the Info documents on a FreeBSD machine (if the info distribution were
 > >        installed).</p>
 > >
 > >        <a name="source"></a>
 > 
 > Surely "was" is correct here? "distribution" is singular, you wouldn't
 > say "if it were installed" would you?
 > 
 > --
 >         Want a lean, mean, computing machine?
 >         Get rid of that excess FAT - install FreeBSD
 > ________________________________________________________________
 >       FreeBSD - The Power To Serve http://www.freebsd.org
 >       My Webpage http://ukug.uk.freebsd.org/~mark/
 > mailto:mark@ukug.uk.freebsd.org             http://www.radan.com
 
 -- 
 Daniel Harris
 dannyboy@subdimension.com
 

From: Daniel Harris <dannyboy@subdimension.com>
To: freebsd-gnats-submit@FreeBSD.org
Cc:  
Subject: Re: docs/19186: Semi-overhaul docs.html
Date: Mon, 12 Jun 2000 09:29:03 -0400

 OK, I think I've solved (avoided) the problems with the was/were change
 by rewriting the paragraphs entirely.  I'm not sure just what I should
 do here -- a diff against the diff?
 
 To avoid clogging GNATS or diffing diffs, I've re-done the original
 diff, now at http://www.worksforfood.com/freebsd/docs.sgml.diff .
 
 -- 
 Daniel Harris
 dannyboy@subdimension.com
 
State-Changed-From-To: open->closed 
State-Changed-By: jim 
State-Changed-When: Mon Jun 12 11:49:46 PDT 2000 
State-Changed-Why:  
Committed, thanks! 

http://www.freebsd.org/cgi/query-pr.cgi?pr=19186 
>Unformatted:
