                             Daily Dumb Questions

DDQs Featured: April, 1999

04/14/1999 - If Fire Fighters fight fires, what do Freedom Fighters fight?
04/13/1999 - Where does the universe end?
04/12/1999 - How do they squeeze all that honey in those little squares?
04/11/1999 - Is the gas the left or right pedal?
04/10/1999 - If i make weird faces, will it really stick?
04/09/1999 - I can't breathe. What should I do?
04/07/1999 - Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?
04/03/1999 - If Hungary ate Turkey is Chile safe?
04/02/1999 - If I eat my leg, will I lose weight?
04/01/1999 - Y do u think people r so stupid to use "y" instead of why, "u" instead of you, and "r" instead of are?


DDQs Featured: March, 1999

03/21/1999 - In your own words what do cucumbers smell like?
03/18/1999 - Why is it that "fat chance" means the same as "slim chance", while "lucked out" is the exact opposite of "out of luck"?
03/08/1999 - Why do banks leave both doors unlocked and yet chain the pens to the counters?
03/04/1999 - Why do tourists go to the top of tall buildings and then put money in telescopes so they can see things on the ground in close-up?
03/01/1999 - If the pen is mightier than the sword, and a picture is worth a thousand words, how dangerous is a fax?

DDQs Featured: February, 1999

02/28/1999 - Why shouldn't I talk to strangers? They may have candy.
02/23/1999 - How come my Club Soda flavored Koolaid won't get stains out of the carpet?
02/22/1999 - What would you do if you found an endangered animal that only ate endangered plants?
02/20/1999 - Why are raisins without seeds got "seedless", but prunes without pits are called "pitted"? What is so wrong with the word "pitless"?
02/18/1999 - How come on forms under gender, you have the choice of unknown? I mean come on, look down. You know, it's either one way or the other. It isn't multiple choice.
02/11/1999 - Can a man with no fingers point you in the right direction?

DDQs Featured: January, 1999

01/30/1999 - Why do they say not to eat yellow snow? It could be melted butter that someone spilled.
01/28/1999 - Is there handicapped parking at the special Olympics? If so, how many and who get's them?
01/27/1999 - If someone asks you "A penny for your thoughts..." and you put in your two cents worth, do you get the other penny back?
01/26/1999 - Who would win a fluffy fight to the death between the Pillsbury Doughboy and the Stay Puff Marshmellow man?
01/19/1999 - If I hold my breath long enough, will I see visions of William Shatner?
01/18/1999 - I have been a finalist in the Publishier's Clearing House sweetpsakes for 11 years now and I haven't seen any cash. What gives?
01/16/1999 - If I get pulled over for speeding, and the officer finds 5 kilos of crack, how many doughnuts would it take to get me out of this one?
01/14/1999 - Why do people always restate the obvious? Like, if they ask you what time it is and you tell them, they respond by saying, "REALLY?!?!" I just say, "No, I just thought I'd say that for my health!!!"
01/05/1999 - Is it fair that lisp has an "s" in it?
01/03/1999 - If a man speaks and there is no women around to here him, is he still wrong?
01/01/1999 - Umm...would it be okay if I wore red track pants with a yellow blouse to work? Oh yeah I'm a customer service representative at K-mart.

DDQs Featured: December, 1998

12/30/1998 - How long after Christmas do I have to wait before I break up with my girlfriend so she doesn't want all her crap back because I think she bought me a nice leather jacket?
12/17/1998 - Why does it always sound better in my head?
12/16/1998 - If I drink something while I'm peeing, will it come out while I'm peeing?
12/15/1998 - I just stuffed my toast in the disk drive. Should I put butter in there too?
12/09/1998 - Why is it that people say that things are always found in the last place they look and why can't we always look in the last place first?
12/04/1998 - Can you gargle mashed potatos?
12/03/1998 - How come if you leave a plate of food on the counter it will get cold, but if you leave a glass of pop on the same counter it will get warm?
12/02/1998 - If the earth really is round, how come fat people don't roll off it?

DDQs Featured: November, 1998

11/24/1998 - If you are supposed to smoke in a smoking jacket, and sleep in a sleeping bag, then what are you supposed to do in a wind breaker?
11/21/1998 - If you try to fail and succeed, what have you just done?
11/18/1998 - Why can't you remove those warning tags from mattresses??
11/15/1998 - Why do people always make me open their pop for them. I HATE THAT! Like even strangers have walked up to me and said, "Will you open my pop?" That's just messed up, so why is that?
11/01/1998 - Does the impending Canadian global military conquest cause you any anxiety?

DDQs Featured: October, 1998

10/31/1998 - Why is a peanut neither a pea or a nut? It's just not fair.
10/30/1998 - If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?
10/29/1998 - Why is an orange called and orange and an apple not a red?
10/23/1998 - In France, do people call French Toast French Toast? Cuz I mean, If they're in France, why call it French? But then what do they call it? Do they call it plain toast? And if so, what do they call regular toast that you put in the toaster? Help me! I'm confused!!
10/19/1998 - Why on a golf course is the middle strip called the "green" isn't everything green?
10/14/1998 - If a tree falls in the middle of the woods, and it lands on a mime, does anyone give a damn?
10/10/1998 - The other day, I noticed I got a great big fifteen-cent raise at the (large supermarket chain!) where I work. As I looked at the paycheck, this question resounded throughout my head and has been bugging me ever since: how come when you BUY something, it's $5.95 PLUS tax- but when you EARN something, it's $5.95 MINUS tax?!
10/08/1998 - If a told b something about c and b told c what a told b about c, is b in the wrong for telling c what a told b about c, and does c have a right to know?
10/04/1998 - What do they call male ladybugs?
10/02/1998 - How did your television show Angry Salad get its name?

DDQs Featured: September, 1998

09/16/1998 - If there's a man in the moon, how come he hasn't come out yet? He looks kinda depressed. Could you please explain that?
09/14/1998 - How come there is ALWAYS a big red button that does something bad in every action movie ever made?
09/07/1998 - Why do they make milk with fat in it and then take the fat our instead of just taking the milk from skinny cows?
09/05/1998 - Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
09/04/1998 - On planes, why are there life preservers instead of parachutes?

DDQs Featured: August, 1998

08/31/1998 - Don't you think that Twix aren't a very good name for a candy bar? What about those single packs of Twix? Then wouldn't it be called a Twick?
08/25/1998 - Why did the red carpet wage war on the green curtains?
08/16/1998 - Why are there sooooo many people around during the summer??? It's like they don't have a life so they come to mess up ours.
08/08/1998 - Why do noses run and feet smell?
08/02/1998 - How do you tell the difference between good banjo playing, and bad banjo playing?

DDQs Featured: July, 1998

07/17/1998 - If you eat at mid-morning it is called brunch, what is it called if you eat at mid-afternoon...lunner?
07/09/1998 - Why do chips that are curled taste better than the others?
07/05/1998 - I need to ask if I am standing up then why is there dirt and grass in my mouth?
07/02/1998 - Why do we keep old things around in house as if they were part of the family? My mom has old flowers in the dining room and they are starting to smell pretty bad, like a rotting smell, and they have no petals, only brown stems. So why?
07/01/1998 - Is it better to put the toilet paper on the toilet paper holder so the paper comes "over the top" or "out the bottom"?
