Posts by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
(DIR) Post #AaOXk6ZavklFtVDWdc by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-09-27T14:10:20Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
It has (correctly) been pointed out to me that it is not a boat. My streak of unfortunate alt text continues. The proper authorities have been notified. Consider me on notice.
(DIR) Post #AakapEq0OsoC5VIs9w by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-10-13T13:22:12Z
3 likes, 1 repeats
“I think you’ve had enough, sir.”
(DIR) Post #AbGzz3y9kam6js0pjE by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-10-29T18:05:36Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
Looking over my left shoulder, I see Mom staring at me, knuckles white on the handle of her cart. I turn my head to find Nana behind the avocados, glaring. My heart pounding, I raise a hand towards the shelf. A bead of sweat falls from my forehead, hitting the floor with a splat.
(DIR) Post #AbQXKyiy2yjga8Q62y by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-11-02T13:41:48Z
0 likes, 1 repeats
i too cry when cutting up an onion but it’s with the happiness of knowing i’m releasing the joyful soul trapped within
(DIR) Post #AbQXLBCTf5THH8Jpi4 by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-11-02T13:46:51Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
the soul of a potato however is a twisted and evil thing
(DIR) Post #AbV95UIzR4H8mm9K1w by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-11-05T16:07:14Z
0 likes, 1 repeats
the wad of chewed bubble gum you spent all of third grade building under your desk became sentient over the decades since and now wanders the earth seeking revenge on its creator
(DIR) Post #AbX0AcKSWKiVqb7xmS by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-11-06T13:35:02Z
13 likes, 10 repeats
Improvise, adapt, overcome.
(DIR) Post #AbllVU4EYuuwZEHh3Y by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-11-13T14:45:27Z
0 likes, 1 repeats
The Crawl of Cthulhu
(DIR) Post #Ac0akD60IkY1aDvlUu by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-11-19T20:12:27Z
2 likes, 1 repeats
A man lies sprawled on the floor of his kitchen, beside a still-warm oven, blood seeping from dozens of claw marks on his face and neck. Sirens begin to wail in the distance as a shadowy figure silently slips away from Drury Lane.
(DIR) Post #Ac4GikhNAvvUloHDs0 by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-11-22T14:38:12Z
13 likes, 9 repeats
Every 12 to 18 months, an upgraded model of Bill Gates emerges from Microsoft’s secret underground facility and immediately sets off to find and destroy its previous incarnation.
(DIR) Post #Ac5L565ouFtyT8a9ho by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-11-23T02:34:36Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
Hal hadn’t survived three Thanksgivings by being stupid.
(DIR) Post #AcAhHIyY0JLEgHCr32 by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-11-25T16:45:35Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
We swore we weren’t gonna get another grandma after the last one died, but when we saw this one at the shelter, we just knew we had to have her.
(DIR) Post #AcTDsZLUnVLbXr21Gy by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-12-04T14:59:54Z
0 likes, 0 repeats
the show must go on
(DIR) Post #AcaqCv7vZkUxr0mEwS by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-12-07T15:02:52Z
1 likes, 2 repeats
my best guess is a vampire fell asleep on it last night
(DIR) Post #AcooWd2R3ghRqjuuki by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-12-14T23:43:17Z
0 likes, 1 repeats
holy shit
(DIR) Post #AdAiOEDfzW8elv7rNY by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-12-25T01:15:14Z
0 likes, 2 repeats
[North Pole, 3am]“You got the stuff?”“You got my money?”“I wanna see them first.”“Here you go, 50 squeaky toys.”“How’s the quality?”“100% pure, unchewed.”“Santa won’t notice them missing?”“You let me worry about that.”
(DIR) Post #AdI5Fxa5cvP7u7M5nE by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2023-12-28T22:54:20Z
0 likes, 1 repeats
“No, YOU look like a Weeble!!”
(DIR) Post #AdVvHavF61nD0o458y by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2024-01-04T20:43:39Z
1 likes, 0 repeats
i got a cheese omelette, home fries, and a subpoena
(DIR) Post #Addoxh5QwWb0VOvsaO by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2024-01-08T14:38:40Z
0 likes, 1 repeats
Years ago, I worked for a company that sold sandwiches in airports. I once got a complaint email that someone’s chicken cordon bleu sandwich was missing the chicken. I replied that “cordon bleu” was French for “not there,” and I have not felt that level of job satisfaction since.
(DIR) Post #Adgx70Gc505rMIhH84 by UncleDuke1969@universeodon.com
2024-01-09T14:47:40Z
0 likes, 1 repeats
It was quickly becoming apparent that Nelson might have slightly overstated his qualifications on the job application.