Posts by TheMewzter@nnia.space
(DIR) Post #A5BanmVdQ5sr8Kx852 by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T01:58:38Z
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@illegaldoggo For once a *Certain voice* I hear is being accepting of you. That's surprising haha...
(DIR) Post #A5Bbp7QREu58FPivgW by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T02:10:05Z
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@illegaldoggo It's kinda scary cause I know several tactics involving, well murder and disposal. Been studying and fixating on it for years xD. But jeez if we're gonna discuss this then not here-
(DIR) Post #A5BcN3w4ijY3Gohu6a by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T02:16:12Z
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@lovelikeyou I don't mind. As long as either side doesn't focus upon their views on me or attempt to degrade me for it. I'm Anti-C for minors and Pro-C for adults (Makes sense due to my age). If nobody tries to change this then I see no reason to engage in conflict.
(DIR) Post #A5Bcm8vpHaIq0LYA6a by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T02:20:44Z
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@illegaldoggo That's true I guess? I'm unsure, I'd have to research the law. Making sure these won't be taken as actual threats we'll commit. The police can be corrupted in their views. Frankly I haven't experienced that absolute factor. But, I don't want to take chances. It's less likely to be taken seriously cause well, our age, our distances, etc. Reputation isn't a huge deal, but when it seeps into authority then it gets messy. I've had police, CPS, MHMR, etc contact me for months. Making sure I was 'staying safe and being mentally stable.'
(DIR) Post #A5BdsZRNjg4BucwGEC by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T02:33:07Z
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@illegaldoggo Still, we cannot trust professionals with much benefit. I have this belief due to it being driven into my brain by my parents, but also cause of other traumatic situations, especially during early teen years. Our actions and feelings may be just, though the dictators won't think so.
(DIR) Post #A5BeRYXl3ywtGVbTnc by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T02:39:26Z
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@illegaldoggo AND JUST AS I MENTION MHMR I GOT A PAMPHLET FROM THEM IN THE MAIL RIGHT NOW. Well. at least it's got a bunch of resources with numbers on em. Still, that's really upsetting.
(DIR) Post #A5BeiP6xNxQmw06Kbg by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T02:42:28Z
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@illegaldoggo Mhm. I'm incredibly annoyed cause of my current 'Nobody is trustworthy and they're all poisoning me' mindset. Which I cannot get rid of.
(DIR) Post #A5Bet4DtO4jXKvQhge by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T02:44:25Z
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@miro Oh, we're not friends anymore?
(DIR) Post #A5BsjWT4uveNOnsMhU by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T05:19:34Z
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I'll say this: Necrophilia and anthropophagy aren't just attractions. They're rules and a lifestyle I must be confined to. A ritual, procedure, daily routine, whatever. They cannot be gotten rid of. Strengthened they will always turn out. Outside sources could interfere with the process that must be completed. For necessary survival.Don't ask more. I'm not answering for various reasons.
(DIR) Post #A5BuLk1H55eyO2eu5A by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T05:37:40Z
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I yearn to 'get more help' but everything else inside me goes against this. So it's 1 against several. How am I not supposed to listen when they've so loud and dictating? Eventually stopped listening to 'real' people as often, which is frustrating to both parties. So, if you want to assist, then force MAY be needed? I'll admit it. I don't know what's best for me. My parents don't seem to know either.
(DIR) Post #A5BxtBb9rfDTL75AMS by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T06:17:20Z
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I seem to go through 5 conflicting mindsets everyday:1. I want more help, and I should attempt getting it.2. I don't want help, I can handle it and nothing's wrong.3. I can't get help, because that's going to make things worse.4. I do want help, but I'm too scared to do anything.5. I refuse to get help, it won't make any difference.Most often it's 3, 4, and 5. Interesting.
(DIR) Post #A5By0v2LK8ZiI8U8jg by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T06:18:44Z
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I seem to go through 5 conflicting mindsets everyday:1. I want help, and I should attempt getting it.2. I don't want help, I can handle it and nothing's wrong.3. I can't get help, because that's going to make things worse.4. I do want help, but I'm too scared to do anything.5. I refuse to get help, it won't make any difference.Most often it's 3 and 4.
(DIR) Post #A5ByPM5aOaM78ueccq by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T06:23:09Z
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Yeah I'm getting more destructive and irrational lately. Just don't expect much good things from me. I have therapy tomorrow morning... I really can't tell her anything at all. Panicking about how I can't rely on therapist anymore.
(DIR) Post #A5Cc9bBEW2rFTpKxWa by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T13:48:30Z
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@KinderLemm I do that a lot to be completely honest.
(DIR) Post #A5CoNtD7KhQT3kkbo0 by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T16:05:32Z
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It's all in the art.
(DIR) Post #A5CoRvWEgzGTNRcPJY by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T16:06:18Z
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Nothing else to say.
(DIR) Post #A5DAicCtwcbTOfwCLw by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T20:15:50Z
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@ParaphiliaFlags Yes, same as on this blog.
(DIR) Post #A5DQ1JyTSKsTfDZE80 by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T23:07:18Z
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Emailed my therapist Kim. About my history with killing and abuse, my attractions, how intense my psychosis truly is, etc. Let's see what will occur next.
(DIR) Post #A5DQF9eybN5djD2lrE by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-14T23:09:47Z
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She responds so fast jeez haha...
(DIR) Post #A5Dy6JSwAh7jyYMsAC by TheMewzter@nnia.space
2021-03-15T05:29:10Z
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Why? Well, in all honesty this place has been worsening my mental health. Along with various recent situations which has happened. I'm taking a step back and comprehending what should be done. Why am I doing this. How do I escape my living situation. It's most problematic with my behavior towards others. These cannot be apologized for. I've said and done shit on here I cannot undo. I'm not healthy at all to handle any of it. Or to speak for ones who are in better light then I. I have 3 current communication accounts:Element: @vehnzee:ma.neko.bar, state who you are before adding please. In replies of this post, or in DMs.Discord: Private, ask me through DMs.Telegram: Private, ask me through DMs.I'm not returning, not anytime soon. I have no other main socials. Figuring out ways to make therapy more benefiting for me.