Posts by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
 (DIR) Post #ARz9Ok7D5lGXzHPhcu by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-01-24T23:32:31Z
       
       2 likes, 2 repeats
       
       You: "Eat the Rich" doesn't mean you would literally cannibalize rich people.Me, hiding giant novelty bbq fork and knife behind my back: oh yeah I knew that
       
 (DIR) Post #AS2rPxcRLkRXcDI9q4 by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-01-26T19:49:31Z
       
       0 likes, 0 repeats
       
       @onan Rich Pinks should be tithing half of their income to me. No need to vote, I know what's best for them
       
 (DIR) Post #AS6grROKRWXOuMQqo4 by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-01-28T16:10:05Z
       
       0 likes, 0 repeats
       
       @onan lots of people are saying this
       
 (DIR) Post #AS8lVgN4xJpN5EDAum by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-01-29T16:11:36Z
       
       0 likes, 0 repeats
       
       @onan why settle for being killed by your co-religionists when you could get the pageantry associated with the Roman Empire?
       
 (DIR) Post #ASLyrcmXnqL3nIFcuG by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-02-05T00:56:07Z
       
       0 likes, 0 repeats
       
       @Peas you look both rootin' AND tootin'
       
 (DIR) Post #ASsDCukLxBuo8Wsftw by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-02-20T14:04:52Z
       
       0 likes, 1 repeats
       
       Parents at work showing me a stuffed rabbit toy: "Is this for a girl or a boy?"Me, stifling the urge to lecture the parents on restrictive gender divisions, before noticing the label on the tag: "It's for a dog"
       
 (DIR) Post #ATDn2RFSxq77WHxA5g by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-03-03T00:14:22Z
       
       0 likes, 0 repeats
       
       @calculsoberic had to reread this to get the joke, at first I just believed that men couldn't stop munching on tide pods
       
 (DIR) Post #ATZAe9MCTPzPQiPdvU by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-03-13T01:00:02Z
       
       0 likes, 0 repeats
       
       @catsnkittens more like gato-rade amirite
       
 (DIR) Post #AUg4z7BMCuZDPcoS8m by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-04-15T13:39:11Z
       
       0 likes, 0 repeats
       
       @lauren free healthcare and maintenance, my own recharging pod? Borg it is!
       
 (DIR) Post #AUg5FMdsUkirzgtwu0 by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-04-15T13:42:21Z
       
       0 likes, 0 repeats
       
       @onan oh hey, looks like Minoru Suzuki in the bottom right, lol
       
 (DIR) Post #AUr1qKDPsXVo8uAn8S by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-04-20T20:23:02Z
       
       0 likes, 0 repeats
       
       @AnarchoNinaWrites just a classic case of making a few whoopsies and accidentally doing a genocide. Happens all the time
       
 (DIR) Post #AVBPGdH7oxzitMcTui by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-04-30T16:22:44Z
       
       0 likes, 0 repeats
       
       @onan i hope to set up my ministry of shitposting on this fine french server just as soon I get my apartment situation resolved! 😈
       
 (DIR) Post #AWCLXafEVnBIYkqc9w by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-05-31T01:07:46Z
       
       0 likes, 0 repeats
       
       @onan people spend lifetimes seeking enlightenment and never getting anywhere, meanwhile SubGenii have instantly reached that lofty state (and more importantly, attained Slack) after only a few seconds of staring between the DOTS of a sacred Dobbshead
       
 (DIR) Post #AXK7CNVQ5BdV5H48ga by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-07-03T06:44:54Z
       
       3 likes, 9 repeats
       
       I love all of the new capitalist innovations like:* Submarines that implode* Computers that lie* Movies no one can watch, for tax reasons
       
 (DIR) Post #AclE9zxTUrlGRycuYq by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-12-13T08:12:33Z
       
       0 likes, 0 repeats
       
       @Rasp rice is great so this is very relatable to me
       
 (DIR) Post #AcyxnlH9dnjuyfxiAi by Cryptika@eldritch.cafe
       2023-12-19T23:15:14Z
       
       0 likes, 1 repeats
       
       @onan it's blasphemy against my religion to not allow me to blaspheme other religions, what now mastodon nerds