Subj : Mystic Pi Year of the Tiger
To   : All
From : Mystic Pi BBS
Date : Wed Nov 23 2022 02:02:02

 _________________________________________
/  A reader reports that when the patient \
| died, the attending doctor recorded the |
| following on the patient's chart:       |
| "Patient failed to fulfill his wellness |
| potential."                             |
|                                         |
| Another doctor reports that in a recent |
| issue of the *American Journal of       |
| Family Practice* fleas were called      |
| "hematophagous arthropod vectors."      |
|                                         |
| A reader reports that the Army calls    |
| them "vertically deployed anti-         |
| personnel devices." You probably call   |
| them bombs.                             |
|                                         |
| At McClellan Air Force base in          |
| Sacramento, California, civilian        |
| mechanics were placed on "non-duty,     |
| non-pay status." That is, they were     |
| fired.                                  |
|                                         |
| After taking the trip of a lifetime,    |
| our reader sent his twelve rolls of     |
| film to Kodak for developing (or        |
| "processing," as Kodak likes to call    |
| it) only to receive the following       |
| notice: "We must report that during the |
| handling of your twelve 35mm Kodachrome |
| slide orders, the films were involved   |
| in an unusual laboratory experience."   |
| The use of the passive is a             |
| particularly nice touch, don't you      |
| think? Nobody did anything to the       |
| films; they just had a bad experience.  |
| Of course our reader can always go back |
| to Tibet and take his pictures all over |
| again, using the twelve replacement     |
| rolls Kodak so generously sent him.     |
|                                         |
| -- Quarterly Review of Doublespeak      |
\ (NCTE)                                  /
 -----------------------------------------
       |           
   (^-====-/^) 
    > === //<          ,.---..__
  :== q^^p ==:    ,...-  |   |' '.
  \__  qp ___/~.-   |   , || /   '-._______ __.":
     ^---^    | |    |     |/   .^-./ _)_)__))_).'
        :| |  |    | '  /   /  {/
       /  /       |    /       \ 
      ,      /   |    / __' \  \
     -    |     |    *~     /\  \
   ^^  - / -  '---'''''' |  | \  \
  |   -^^   |  |         |  |  |  |
  dddd      |  |         |  | dddd
            |  |        dddd  
           dddd*

--- Mystic BBS v1.12 A47 (Raspberry Pi/32)
 * Origin: Mystic Pi BBS bcw142.zapto.org (21:1/145)

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