Subj : On a Lighter Note...  2.
To   : Richard Webb
From : Ardith Hinton
Date : Tue Feb 06 2018 22:26:48

Hi again, Richard!  This is a continuation of my previous message to you:

RW>  [...] this guy was a bit too intense for most junior
RW>  high situations.


          Sounds familiar.  I taught theory & expected my students to work with 
me to produce the best sound we could achieve together even though my principal 
said "Just keep 'em playing... that's what they want at this age!"  I was never 
as popular as the band teacher at his former school.  But a few years later one 
of my ex-students told me, with some amazement, that the kids in his band class 
at senior high who hadn't been in my class had no experience with 5/4.  Another 
followed in my footsteps & eventually became a band teacher himself.  AFAIC one 
can't be sure who will become a professional musician or a teacher or a staunch 
supporter of the arts later on & I owe it to my students to do my best....  :-)



RW>  HE was truly one of those musician's musician types,


          Some folks end up as teachers only after they realize they can't make 
a living as professional musicians...



RW>  played half a dozen different instruments, and all of
RW>  them very well, etc.


          ... OTOH, unlike many of my classmates who were enrolled in the music 
department rather than the education department, he seems to have taken courses 
of this nature seriously!  I can play half a dozen instruments too, but I don't 
necessarily play all of them well or have the nerve to do it in public....  ;-)



AH>  A great lesson for all concerned.  :-))

RW>  YEp, and part of that was his admission that he should
RW>  have expected that I'd work out an alternative signaling
RW>  arrangement with my neighbors and been able to put two and
RW>  two together.  I think he was a bit disappointed that his
RW>  wife didn't correlate one action with another.


          Perhaps he accepted her interpretation without question... regardless 
of how well she knew each individual student and/or how much she knew about the 
technical aspects of conducting... because she was his wife.  Dallas & I have a 
friend in his eighties who, while he himself has remained single, repeats a lot 
of the grumbling he hears from another person about wife #2 with no distinction 
between fact & opinion.  Although we haven't met wife #2 we have known this man 
since he was married to wife #1.  We can both see why he'd be difficult to live 
with.  Our friend once said as much but clearly idolized wife #1... [wry grin].

          I believe a lot of otherwise intelligent adults who are old enough to 
have fully developed prefrontal lobes (or whatever) tend to make errors of this 
nature fairly often when their nearest & dearest are involved.  As a teacher, I 
know I must be objective in my evaluation... and I know I must provide adequate 
data to support whatever conclusion(s) I arrive at.  Your teacher probably knew 
that too.  As a wife & mother, however, I often find myself expected in various 
social situations to keep other women occupied so their menfolk can talk freely 
about the common interests which brought them together with Dallas & me.  While 
I don't know the woman you've alluded to it wouldn't surprise me if her husband 
chose her at least in part because she was operating on a different level, then 
overestimated her ability to understand his concerns sometimes.  But I think it 
is to his credit that he was educable.  I'm also taking into account when these 
events probably occurred.  Years ago, the average schoolteacher had no training 
or experience WRT special needs.  Your teacher may have been a pioneer, just as 
Dallas & I were, with very few positive role models & with very little support.

          Reading between the lines... I gather you & I are about the same age. 
As it happens, our own daughter attended the elementary school a girl I babysat 
during my late teens wasn't allowed to attend because she was legally blind.  A 
lot has changed since then.  I reckon you encountered some of the same problems 
we've encountered, however.  The idea that folks who are "different" want to do 
what they're doing is still new & unfamiliar to many other folks.  And we often 
find ourselves battling misconceptions such as the idea that everybody who uses 
a wheelchair is exactly like whoever else gets most of the publicity... (sigh).




--- timEd/386 1.10.y2k+
 * Origin: Wits' End, Vancouver CANADA (1:153/716)

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