Subj : Re: Eat What You Like To : Daryl Stout From : George Pope Date : Thu Apr 01 2021 08:47:53 > George, > > until I was 43...but never dreamed I'd be a widower at 47. > GP> For real?! Ouch! :( > Yep...and I never remarried. But, I'm glad my parents and wife are gone > now, so they wouldn't see me suffer. Hold off on the suffering. You haven't been made acquaintance with the Holy Spirit so you can be miserable! ;) "Rejoice in the Lord always, & again I say: Rejoice" (I interpret that to mean to eat dessert first, second, third, etc.) It's a good deed to eat all the desserts at a pot luck (otherwise the bakers feel insulted) > GP> I married at 42 (late enough); first time dad at 44. . . It's a young > GP> man's game, but I'm surviving it. . . :) > Getting married should scare the crap out of a man. It did me, > literally... > I had IBS the morning before we went to my wife's church to the ceremony. *LOL* Did you bring your own "music" to the ceremony? Tooting out "Here comes the bride," maybe? > Her church had a potluck every other Sunday, and that's when we got married. > We walked in, and were greeted with "Ah!! The Bride And Groom!!"...to which, > I said, "We're not married yet". Close enough; you're bride & groom until married then you're husband & wife. > I want to backtrack a little though...to the bridal shower a month before. > My fiance' (I used to think it was pronounced "finance-ee". ) wanted > everyone there...not just the ladies. If your fiancée pronounces it as financer, run. . . > The funniest part was where they were giving the new couple to be, advice; > but no one would sign their names. Here are the top 3: > 3) "Janice shouldn't be the only one with dish pan hands". > After working at Burger King for 5 years over 40 years ago, I was no > stranger to doing dishes, taking out trash, etc. I've had to do such since > her death...and have no sympathy for husbands who say "housework is for the > woman". It's so wrong. I did my share of dishes, back when I had both hands working. With my first GF (live-in) we negotiated chores; I cooked, she cleaned up. Now, my wife hates shopping (as did I, so I gave her that I'd do the shopping as a bonus wedding gift); I buy it, she cooks it. > 2) "Daryl...pray for the Second Coming (of The Lord Jesus Christ). Jan... > pray that it is soon". > I had thought of myself as a Life Member of BTR (Bachelor 'Til Rapture); > but The Good Lord made a liar out of me on that...and I got voted out. Seems like this one was a mite cynical. > 1) "Violets are Purple. Roses are Red. When Daryl is blue...Jan, head for > the bed". > The preacher's wife (a natural blonde, but smarter than one), and > myself, turned the color of a tomato. I uttered the S word in an > expletive as I put my head down on the table. No one heard it, as > the entire room had erupted into raucous laughter. Janice said "Oh!! > He's turning a much brighter shade of pink than he normally does!!". > I was *NEVER* so embarrassed in all my life!! Aww -- this is what makes indelible memories. > But, at the wedding, I was so nervous, that I put her engagement > ring (that we got for $25 at a Going Out Of Business Sale from an > area K-Mart store (I think all of them are gone now)...her wedding > ring...and my wedding ring, all on her finger. My BIL married my sister with "take to be my awfully wedded wife"(nervous); luckily the ceremony was caught on video. . . > I'm about to blurt out "Where the Hell is the other one??!!" > The Good Lord is so wise..the preacher gently admonished (and > everyone heard it) "You're not supposed to put all the rings > on her finger!!". As I let out "Oops...I'm a little nervous!!", > the entire group roared in laughter. A happy day for all! > But, when I sang "The Vows Go Unbroken" by the late Kenny > Rogers (aka "The Gambler"), there wasn't a dry eye in the house. > To this day, nearly 18 years later, I still can't look at the > wedding video without crying like a baby. Nothing wrong with that -- it means you felt & felt sincerely. It's a treasure. > Afterwards, my new wife and I were changing out of our > wedding duds (before the ceremony, as the potluck was ending, > the preacher said "I've got to go put my marrying clothes on"), > and it was taking a bit to switch out. We were in a small room, > and for obvious reasons, had closed and locked the door. The > guy who was my best man (he died 5 months after my wife died... > she had a heart attack, he had cancer), knocked on the door, > and asked "What are you doing in there??". I wish I would've had > my wits about me...I would've replied "Playing Strip Poker". Why not, right? In the Jewish tradition marriage is consummated not by a bloody sheet hung out the window, but by the bride & groom going in to a small room in seclusion together for a half hour or so -- to "eat a small meal together, privately" Yup, people assume what they wish to. . . > GP> Maybe some guest jokers? > So the one from Batman is on lunch break?? He died, didn't he? > GP> Quotes on parenting: > GP> “Parenthood is a journey except it's just traveling from room to room > GP> putting away the same toys all day long.” —@OneFunnyMummy > Or wrap up the toys they haven't touched in awhile, and give > them as Christmas presents (one parent did this, and the kids > thought they were new...but they had forgotten they hadn't played > with them in a long time). That's a good one, but check they're still the right age for it. . . > GP> “Parenting is mostly just informing kids how many more minutes they > GP> have of something.” —@yoyoha > And, the clock is ticking. To ground your kid, don'ty take away their devices -- take away their chargers, so they get to slowly watch the batteries get lower & lower. . . > GP> “You know you're a parent when you've washed yourself with baby wipes > GP> to save time in the morning.” —Anonymous > That's for sure!! So convenient! > GP> “I asked my mom if I was adopted. She said, ‘Not yet, but we placed an > GP> ad.’" —Dana Snow > I've been thinking about adoption lately, but nobody wants to take a 12yo boy who eats like a Sumo wrestler! > GP> “Driving around at 3am with soft music on the radio isn't normal, but > GP> as a parent it is.” —@Batman1285 > Kids are like kitties...it's play time at 3am. & the smooth motio of the car helps get those wee bairs a-snoozing. I used to just walk around for hours with the kid in my arms (as a teen babysitting for the neighbourhood single moms) > GP> “My favorite part of parenting is after I drop my kids off at school. > GP> I’m kidding. It’s after they go to bed.” —@CallMeDraper > As one commercial noted "Until they relax, I can't relax". My wife & I sing the Staples Xmas ad jingle in September: "It's the most wonderful time of the year. . ." > GP> “Having children is like living in a frat house — nobody sleeps, > GP> everything's broken, and there's a lot of throwing up.” —Ray Romano > Basically. You know, eh? How many kids do you have? > ... Well, to be frank, I'd have to change my name. I got a wrong number(she sounded cute) called in once asking for Heather, I said, "I can be Heather for ya; how long do you need me for?" She laughed & said, "sorry, wrong number." Your friend, <+]:{)} Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM --- SBBSecho 3.14-Linux * Origin: The Rusty MailBox - Penticton, BC Canada (1:153/757.2) .