Subj : Re: you okay, mate? To : Daryl Stout From : George Pope Date : Fri Sep 03 2021 09:19:52 > George, > > That, and switching FIDONet hubs. My original one was shutting down, > > due to a job change. Then, I forgot to change my default AKA, so Internet > > Rex got constipated, and I had to give it an enema. :P > GP> I dinnae ken your words there, mate! > It cleared the backlog of a crapload of messages in FIDONet. Okay; wouldn't it pull up old ones again? Or your pointers were remembered between hubs? > GP> Ouch; not good! You're going to let them put a laser into your heart to > GP> burn tattoos into your inner heart?! > If that's what it takes to stop this atrial flutter, yes. I'm on a heart > monitor until Sept. 15. It looks like I'll have to switch them out and > charge the phone and the monitor tomorrow...downtime should be 90 minutes to > 3 hours. Fair enough; you do what's medically indicatem nio matter how it sdounds, like when the doctor said, to get my kidnmey styone, he'd "go in with a stent to hold space open, them follow up with a camera on a stick, then a tiny laser on a stick & blast that thing whjile he's looking right at it. I asked, "Where are you planing to go "in" (thinking of scars in my personal zone); he said "through your urethra" I said, "I know wgat thart is, Doc, you better be knocking me out first!" He assured me I'd be under with a General. Essentially he was going to film a Star Wars sequel in my shmeckle! Or maybe the movie adaptation of Atari "Asteroids"? *LOL* Speaking of. . why is it when they're up in the hemisphere they're called asteroids, but when they're in your a*s, they're called hemmorrhoids? > While they'd go through both sides of the groin, and least they're not > going to burn something down there. :P I'm already preparing to pee and > poop the bed. :P > GP> They technically ought to be fired for not using a set they know the > GP> quality & provenance for. > It may have worked for other patients, but didn't want to work for me. It > was like Groucho Marx as Doctor Quackenbush, taking this guy's pulse...and > he says "Either this man is dead, or my watch is stopped". :P > GP> I think your head would've been where it always is, albeit a bit achy > GP> from a goose knot atop it! > At least it wasn't Cranial Rectal Syndrome...the most common workplace > injury. Or Zachary Disease, where their face look Zachary like their butt. > GP> I had a basic Schwinn one-speed; took me forever to learn to ride it (I > GP> was not a fan of falling, not a collector of road rash, by preference). > I did it up in a patriotic theme (red, white, and blue) for a "Field Day" > event in elementary school 50 years ago. If I remember right, I got awarded > a blue ribbon. :) > GP> Eventually my dad threatened to throw it in the trash if I wasn't > GP> riding it by the time he got back from his 2 days at work. I went from > GP> zero to riding no-hands in the early afternoon he was due back (got off > GP> work at 3pm & drove an hour or so home) > I used it when I delivered an afternoon newspaper route in south Florida > back in the mid 1970's -- that paper is long gone, and the family moved to > Arkansas in 1977. > GP> They called Air Traffic Control & were told they had winged the wong > GP> number (the Chinese had bought out SC's ATC) > Or like the meme of this place..."The Wong Foo King Book Store". > GP> Could be that prunes are the essential flavour base. Most pops werre > GP> invenmted by druggists to help with one condition or other (7-Up was > GP> "Lithiated Soda - good for bipolar, Pepsi(pepsin) for stomach acid > GP> issues, Coke(cocaine) for headaches & Lethargy). > This is true. > GP> Perhaps Dr. Pepper was "just what the doctor ordered" for constipation. > So many have diarrhea of the mouth, and constipation of the brain (i.e. > all the government officials) that colonoscopy prep wouldn't help them. > GP> You do know why constipated people are most likely to be apathetic, > GP> don't you? > They're exhaustipated...too tired to give a $***. :P > GP> I thought covid shots were free? Or you mean the proof of vaccination? > I stand corrected...it is the latter. But, one doctor or pharmacist was > giving saline or a placebo instead of the correct vaccine. > GP> Ours will be digital, once rolled out in the next week or so (after > GP> 13-Sept, no going into stores or grou pevents without one proving > GP> you've had at least one shot; as of 26th, need both shots) > I took a photo of mine, and put it on my cellphone. I also bought a > plastic holder and lanyard from Amazon to have it in (it was getting > dog-eared in the wallet). > GP> Have you seen that scene in Dr. Folittle, where the little > GP> dog(dachsund?) is talking to a young Dr. Dolittle, giving the > GP> commemtary on hhis vet visit, including the thermomenter up the butt > GP> ("oh no, it's swallowing it. . . it's GONE! GET IT OUT OF ME! GET IT > GP> OUT OF ME!") > No, never saw that one. > GP> Where to pick my inspiration? hmmm. . . > GP> Q: What did the laser weapon say to the atom bomb? > GP> A: OK, boomer. > Never mind Boomer Sooner (for all the University Of Oklahoma Fans). > GP> [a little old now] > GP> My New Years resolution for next year will be to finally get that laser > GP> eye surgery I’ve always wanted > GP> It’s my 2020 vision > If you have hindsight, are you looking at butts, or do your cheeks have > eyes?? )I( > GP> Q: What do laser guns and churches have in common? > GP> A: Pews (think girl gamers) > They're buying new air fresheners for the church to get rid of the pews. > A bean supper will be held Friday evening in the Fellowship Hall to > benefit the choir...music will follow. > > GP> Superman using his eye lasers for laser eye surgery... > GP> How eye-ronic would that be? > I can see him doing that. > GP> I tried to pick up the navy's new mounted laser turret but it weighed > GP> more than a ton. > GP> I thought a laser would be light. > Do not look into laser with remaining eye. > GP> If you do the calculations to enable a laser to work, are you doing > GP> crystal math? > 2+2=5 -- for extremely large values of 2. > Daryl > ... 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