Subj : Re: Think You're Stupid?? To : George Pope From : Daryl Stout Date : Wed Jul 07 2021 21:25:00 George, GP> Always good to know who you hang out with who get uptight over such GP> innocence. . . Those who have a fit need to get a life. Most of the young children don't know any better. GP> & why not? I'm okay with any words in the dictionary if used GP> grammatically correctly & not being used to hurt others. Exactly. I think of the language of William Shakespeare (in how the 1611 King James Bible was done), in one of his many plays, Romeo And Juliet. The first time he saw her, he said "I was filled with compassion, and my bowels were moved". It sounds like he was so love struck, that it scared the crap out of him...just like what marriage should do to a guy who has never been married. This is TMI...but it did me...I was up all night with IBS. :P GP> They had no business condemning & censoring anyway! The culture is so much to that nowadays...if it offends them, it should not be around. For that matter, that's what the scales in the doctor's offices are...offensive. GP> I've seen Darci before, but now looked her up & watching all her AGT GP> performances; I laughed when the bunny hid Darci's mouth with one paw! That WAS funny. I liked when she was doing a performance (it was before AGT) at a theatre in Oklahoma City (her hometown), with Edna Doorknocker (what a name!! ). Now, the ventriloquist is doing ALL the conversation (them and the "dummy"), but they make you believe the "dummy" is alive!! Well, in this one skit, Edna is flirting with a guy in the audience. The conversation goes like this: Darci: Edna!! Don't you know that kissing a man that young could be fatal?? Edna: Well, if he dies, he dies!! Darci: Edna Doorknocker!! Edna: Darci, don't you know when it comes to love, it's mind over matter. Darci: What does that mean?? Edna: If they don't mind, it don't matter. Then later, Edna wanted to "sing". Darci made it like she didn't want to do a song, and told Edna "Without me, you can't sing!!", and Edna retorts "Without me, you don't have a college fund!!". It brought the house down in laughter!! GP> Hard to claim absolute first place when both got top honours (golden GP> buzzer) True...and both were in tears. GP> I've seen it on a Burger King sign: "Now hiring for all shifts" (but GP> the 'f' was missing) I saw a similar deal at a Wendy's today, and thought the same thing. :P GP> Have you heard they’re cleaning pigs with ham sanitizer? GP> That’s just hogwash! At least you're not using a tenderizer to beat the meat with. GP> Doc told me he has good news and bad news for me. Bad news is my organs GP> are shutting down from my eating only pepperoni, ham & salami. GP> Good news is, I’m cured! I bought a cured ham...I wonder what it had. And, as a T-shirt I bought years ago noted, "Do Not Try To Cure This Ham". GP> Q: What should we be eating on Easter instead of Ham? GP> A: IHOP I was never one for pancakes...except for the thin ones that my late grandmother made. I wouldn't use much syrup on them, though. GP> That’s a nice ham you got there. GP> It’d be a shame if someone put an S in front of it and an E behind it. Nothing like spelling it out. GP> Q: What do you call a radio after it blows up GP> A: A boom box Or it turns your vehicle into an earthquake zone. GP> I'd tell you a Ham radio pun, but it's not always well received. If you go to www.qrz.com, look for WX4QZ -- click on the hyperlink there, and download the PDF file on ham radio humor. I did a 3 part skit, called "The Triple Play"... 1) The Ham Radio Wedding -- uniting ham and radio in holy telephony 2) The Honeymoon And More -- the first night together, and more 3) The 12 Days Of Hamming -- 12 things about the hobby The first two are loaded with pun humor...non-hams wouldn't be able to understand much of it. GP> Car sticker - "Radio amateurs do it with frequency." Or on the vehicle that had a bumper sticker that noted "As a matter of fact, I don't have enough antennas on my car"...and he has at least a dozen antennas on the roof...and you can imagine the amount of rigs in the vehicle. He must have a heck of a battery or power supply to power all those radios!! GP> At my local club there is a sign that says "If your mast is still GP> standing after a storm, it probably didn't have enough antennas in it" That's true. GP> On our club's Monday Night Net, one gentleman, Gwynn, W8BY, now sadly GP> SK, used to tell jokes. They were mostly not ham radio related, but GP> here's one in which amateur radio plays a part: GP> One Saturday morning, Sam held an antenna party at his house. About a GP> half dozen hams showed up, and the antenna went up pretty quick. At GP> this point, they all headed inside for lunch...except for Joe. Sam GP> asked the other guys, "Hey, where's Joe?" After getting a bunch of GP> blank stares, Sam headed outside to find Joe. GP> As it turned out, Joe was still up on the roof. Sam yelled up, "Hey, GP> Joe. What are you still doing up there?" To which Joe replied, "Well, GP> didn't you say that the drinks were on the house?" Ah, yes!! The adult beverages (we call them the 807's). I'll have to add that to my file. GP> At this point, Gwynn would let out a low groan, and you could almost GP> hear all of the other hams who'd checked into the net let out a low GP> groan, too. One blind ham years ago, did a "blind joke net". He was serious as can be...but all of us listening were laughing our butts off!! GP> George Washington and his father used Morse code! When young George GP> chopped down the cherry tree his father asked "Who di-dit?" and George GP> replied "I di- dit, da-dah" Good one!! I'll have to add that to the file as well. GP> HEARD ON 2O METERS GP> "Yesterday, my XYL said she'd leave me if I didn't give up ham radio. GP> Over." Or the woman sobbing "When I said 'It's Me Or The Radios!!', he said 'Seven Three'". GP> An elderly ham driver was going down the interstate when suddenly his 2 GP> meter rig crackled his call...Answering...he heard a fellow ham's GP> urgent warning....."Hey Elmer, just heard on the news that there's a GP> car going down I-40 the wrong way, please be careful"!! GP> Elmer replied,"Well I'll declare, it's not just one....... GP> there's hundreds of them'!!!!!!!!! Exactly. GP> Is it true that "bandwidth" refers to a Ham's waist size? That's another good one. Daryl, WX4QZ .... Ham Radio QRP: When you care the most to send the very least. === MultiMail/Win v0.52 --- SBBSecho 3.14-Win32 * Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - Little Rock, Arkansas (1:19/33) .