Subj : An Oldie To : ALL From : DAVE COBLE Date : Sun Jan 23 2005 23:33:16 What kind of an Amiga owner are you? ==================================== 1. Who's really responsible the Amiga's "death" ? a) God b) Bill Clinton, John M., Jean C., etc. c) Marc Barrett d) Irv the Ghoul & Mehdi Ali 2. A good clone is: a) 486DX/66 MHz running Windows 3.1 with 16MB of RAM and 1GB drive. b) the same system running OS/2 2.2 instead of Windows. c) the same system running NeXTStep. d) a dead one. 3. If someone were to give me a clone for free, I would: a) be speechless ... oh, the joy of Windows ... I can't wait to sit through the bootup procedure. Oooooh, that drive thrashing sounds marvelous! b) thank him/her, then dedicate the clone to playing Doom every so often. c) thank him/her, then quickly sell it to buy another Amiga (and remember to cross his/her name off your Christmas mailing list). d) open the machine quickly and salvage all the neat toys for my Amiga. 4. Your friend came over to your house and found a nondescript computer on the floor next to the door. You told him that it is: a) a clone. I am upgrading the CPU and motherboard for more memory so I can run the latest versions of Windows applications. b) a clone. I am getting it fixed soon so I can get on with my life. c) a clone. Wanna buy it? Cheap? d) a clone. Dutifully serving its current function as a high-tech doorjam ever since you bought your Amiga. 5. So you've bought a new game that cost you a good bit of lunch money but the copy protection scheme won't let it run on your A3000/A4000/ A-anything except the developer's decrepit old A500 with severe drive alignment problem. (or, alternatively, you purchased an otherwise respectable "pain"'ing program that came with a dongle ... pick your own scenario) your reaction, as an Amiga owner, is: a) so ... what else is new? b) write nasty letters and vowed never buy another product from them again. c) inform them of their sins and urge them to repent. d) recommend the clone version of the product to your clone-owning friends. 6. Now that Commodore US went "poof", my Amiga: a) doesn't work anymore. All of a sudden there's this weird flashing red box on the screen: "GURU MEDITATION: 8001deadbeef00f2 1000", it said. After consulting the owner's manual, I discover that the Larkin chip had just self-destructed. b) I have no life ... let alone an Amiga. c) wears a new "Commodore Deathbed Vigil" T-shirt, and I'll never wash it! d) is humming along just fine, thank you for asking ... been that way for years. 7. Amidst rumors of the Samsung purchase of Amiga technologies, I: a) am so ashamed. Anybody wanna get this useless A4000 off me? Cheap? b) remember buying something incredibly cheap from them a long time ago. c) remember buying something incredibly cost-effective from them a long time ago ... and wouldn't you know it ... it's still working today! d) am looking forward to possible licensing of Amiga technologies so there will finally (possibly) be Amiga clones and the software market will expand and the world be such a nice place and the sun will shine just a little brighter each day and the Amiga programmers should be worshipped (and wear capes if they wanted to) ... 8. When I see a clone user engaging in such an unsavory act of ... piracy, I: (Whatcha thinking? This is a PG13 echo, eh!) a) ask them for a copy of the software, oh please ... can I have one? huh? b) call the FBI..."uh shunny, whatchasay, a pirate clown? with floppy ears?" c) d) cross your fingers and hope they never waddle through our Amiga pond. 9. From the day I bought my Amiga, my life has been: a) going downhill. I remember how popular I once was, when I was part of "the crowd". All those clone ex-friends feverishly exchanging the latest warez. Hey, DuDZ, wanna copy of Excel for a few blank disks? b) why should I tell you? In fact, why the heck am I reading this stuff now? I should have been online answering my love letters. c) improving ... now I am dating a girl/guy from across the country. Oh, I met her/him on on-line networks and we hit it off instantly She/he does own a clone/Mac, though. d) what life? I have no life. It's just me and the Amiga. 10. Who "looks like a professor gone terribly wrong" ? a) why, me, of course! b) Joyce Divina c) Skal Lorett d) Eric V. Petersen and lastly, Zeemah: a) is a unique alcoholic windshield washing fluid. b) is a perfect substitute if you happen to need battery acid on a dirt road ... away from all known civilizations. c) produces a bunch of annoying commercials. d) zucks. --- Platinum Xpress/Win/WINServer v3.0pr5 * Origin: Try Our Web Based QWK: DOCSPLACE.ORG (1:123/140) .