(IMG) Heart
It might be too hard, asking too much. Telling your self to be play
might be like telling your self to be happy. Granted, it'd be great
you were happy. Or even just more playful. But if you don't think
you're either, telling your self to be happy or playful isn't going
make it happen. In fact, it's likely to make you depressed,
frustrated, [and] angry at your self for being someone you just don
want to be.
That's what worries me about this whole idea of telling your self t
be playful when you think you're not. I mean, who's telling whom? I
the self that's telling you to change such an expert in playfulness
that it can change you? I don't think so. I think that particular
self is anything but playful. That's the very self that gets so
serious, so humorless, [and] so disparaging. And the self it's
talking to is probably the one that feels bad about itself, feels
that there's something wrong with it, something that needs to be,
heaven forfend, changed.
It's a good idea to be more playful. Just like it's a good idea to
happier. But to get there, you need to stop telling your self to be
different.
Try this, instead. Try letting your self tell you. Ask it to let yo
know when it's feeling happy or playful. In fact, I'd suggest an ev
simpler question. Ask it to tell you when it's having fun.
Fun, like I say somewhere later on, is easy. Playful, happy, maybe
so much. But fun? You can have fun watching television. OK, maybe n
like deep fun. But fun, nevertheless. You can have fun reading,
browsing, searching for something on the computer. You can have fun
eating. Chewing gum. Knitting. Taking a walk. Tasting. Feeling.
Smelling. Listening. Touching. You can have fun watching someone el
have fun.
After a while, after you've spent enough time listening to your sel
talk about all the fun you're having, you can start asking your sel
to tell you when you're feeling playful or even happy. It's easier
your self now because you've been talking so much about the fun you
having, and usually when you're having fun, that's what you're feel
but, you know, you're having fun, and, well, that's what makes you
happy, makes you want to play, makes you even want to get other peo
and beings and things to play with you.
And then, see, you've become the playful person you always were, bu
never thought you were enough, never noticed, never allowed your se
to believe in. And so your life starts feeling even more fun, and y
start feeling even happier, being even more playful. Just like that
From: A Playful Path by Bernard De Koven
(DIR) BenCollver - Phlog
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