From owner-biophys@hgmp.mrc.ac.uk Wed Jul 25 22:08:05 2001 Return-Path: Received: from localhost (localhost [127.0.0.1]) by mercury.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk (Postfix) with ESMTP id 8929517AA9 for ; Wed, 25 Jul 2001 22:08:04 +0100 (BST) Received: from localhost (localhost [127.0.0.1]) by mercury.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk (Postfix) with ESMTP id 85F8617CF3 for ; Wed, 25 Jul 2001 22:08:01 +0100 (BST) Received: from niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk (niobium [193.62.192.41]) by mercury.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk (Postfix) with ESMTP id D06D317AA9 for ; Wed, 25 Jul 2001 22:07:56 +0100 (BST) Received: (from news@localhost) by niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk (8.9.3+Sun/8.8.8) id WAA10836 for biophys-list@hgmp.mrc.ac.uk; Wed, 25 Jul 2001 22:02:27 +0100 (BST) X-Authentication-Warning: niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk: news set sender to using -f From: Bowers X-Newsgroups: alt.sports.soccer.manchester.united.scum-haters,bionet.biophysics Subject: Re: Dear !Jones Message-ID: References: <2ketltcf5122bamsg1q7inkf4fkdaqadhk@4ax.com> <9jn6q8$c04$1@newsreaderm1.core.theplanet.net> X-Newsreader: Forte Agent 1.8/32.548 MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Lines: 84 Date: Wed, 25 Jul 2001 16:01:48 -0500 X-Complaints-To: abuse@onemain.com To: biophys@hgmp.mrc.ac.uk Sender: owner-biophys@hgmp.mrc.ac.uk Precedence: bulk On Wed, 25 Jul 2001 20:39:59 +0100, "Fester" wrote: > >Bowers wrote in message >news:mr4ultclqv15lhm0996016fmtkhvfugfp2@4ax.com... >> On Wed, 25 Jul 2001 12:52:52 -0500, !Jones >> wrote: >> >> >On Wed, 25 Jul 2001 07:28:47 -0500, Stefan Walker >> > wrote: >> > >> >>Dear !Jones; >> >> >> >>In biology class, we learned that male semen is really millions of >> >>tiny skummies swimming furiously upstream to find the egg (you >> >know... >> >>the old "birds and the bees" thing). Anyway, my question is: when I >> >>jerk off, how come it just sits there in a puddle? How come it >> >>doesn't swim away? >> >> >> >>Curious >> > >> >Dear Curious; >> > >> >You have to view a puddle of cum as a physical "system" and analyze >> >it's behavior from that paradigm. You see, all of those little >> >skummies are swimming in random directions and, thus, tend to cancel >> >each other out. The puddle of semen cannot possibly move unless they >> >can be trained to act in unison. >> > >> >Jones >> >> The point you're both missing is the locus of the sperm's motion. >> It's analogous to suggesting that, if all of the fish in a lake would >> suddenly swim in the same direction, the lake would move; it would >> not. An individual sperm cell in the puddle of semen exerts a force >> opposite and equal to its forward acceleration... thus each sperm >> cancels its own motion with respect to the greater system; i.e. the >> puddle of cum. >> >> D. Bowers, Ph.D. > >How exactly does one measure the performance of sperm and then get around to >comparing that performance with the molecular structure and performance of >water? > >Surely the best method would be to fill one blokes testicles with real sperm >and the other with water and see which of the two contenders manages to >fertilize the egg first? > >As for sperm moving in random directions ... that's crap, they can all spot >the chance of a swim in the furry goblet so they all go the same way, hence >providing the man's testicles with a swinging forward motion. Obviously if >the fish in a lake all moved at once the lake would move as the fish would >displace more water if they all went in to a smaller area, granted the >ammount changed would be minimal but the fish would cause the water to >move!!! > >Phil Macavity. STD. Well, you're right and wrong at the same time, young fellow; you see, once a bloke has wiped his knob on the beef curtains, the sperm are in a liquid environment. It's more akin to dumping a bucket of guppies into the ocean. The fish move about. of course, but the ocean stays put. D. Bowers, Ph.D. .