From owner-biophys@hgmp.mrc.ac.uk Wed Jul 25 20:38:18 2001 Return-Path: Received: from localhost (localhost [127.0.0.1]) by mercury.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk (Postfix) with ESMTP id D648C17CF8 for ; Wed, 25 Jul 2001 20:38:15 +0100 (BST) Received: from localhost (localhost [127.0.0.1]) by mercury.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk (Postfix) with ESMTP id 2BC0C17CF6 for ; Wed, 25 Jul 2001 20:38:10 +0100 (BST) Received: from niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk (niobium [193.62.192.41]) by mercury.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk (Postfix) with ESMTP id 88E0217CF4 for ; Wed, 25 Jul 2001 20:37:57 +0100 (BST) Received: (from news@localhost) by niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk (8.9.3+Sun/8.8.8) id UAA00886 for biophys-list@hgmp.mrc.ac.uk; Wed, 25 Jul 2001 20:31:28 +0100 (BST) X-Authentication-Warning: niobium.hgmp.mrc.ac.uk: news set sender to using -f From: "Fester" X-Newsgroups: alt.sports.soccer.manchester.united.scum-haters,bionet.biophysics Subject: Re: Dear !Jones Date: Wed, 25 Jul 2001 20:39:59 +0100 Organization: Customer of Energis Squared Lines: 59 Message-ID: <9jn6q8$c04$1@newsreaderm1.core.theplanet.net> References: <2ketltcf5122bamsg1q7inkf4fkdaqadhk@4ax.com> X-Complaints-To: abuse@theplanet.net X-Priority: 3 X-MSMail-Priority: Normal X-Newsreader: Microsoft Outlook Express 5.00.2615.200 X-MimeOLE: Produced By Microsoft MimeOLE V5.00.2615.200 To: biophys@hgmp.mrc.ac.uk Sender: owner-biophys@hgmp.mrc.ac.uk Precedence: bulk Bowers wrote in message news:mr4ultclqv15lhm0996016fmtkhvfugfp2@4ax.com... > On Wed, 25 Jul 2001 12:52:52 -0500, !Jones > wrote: > > >On Wed, 25 Jul 2001 07:28:47 -0500, Stefan Walker > > wrote: > > > >>Dear !Jones; > >> > >>In biology class, we learned that male semen is really millions of > >>tiny skummies swimming furiously upstream to find the egg (you > >know... > >>the old "birds and the bees" thing). Anyway, my question is: when I > >>jerk off, how come it just sits there in a puddle? How come it > >>doesn't swim away? > >> > >>Curious > > > >Dear Curious; > > > >You have to view a puddle of cum as a physical "system" and analyze > >it's behavior from that paradigm. You see, all of those little > >skummies are swimming in random directions and, thus, tend to cancel > >each other out. The puddle of semen cannot possibly move unless they > >can be trained to act in unison. > > > >Jones > > The point you're both missing is the locus of the sperm's motion. > It's analogous to suggesting that, if all of the fish in a lake would > suddenly swim in the same direction, the lake would move; it would > not. An individual sperm cell in the puddle of semen exerts a force > opposite and equal to its forward acceleration... thus each sperm > cancels its own motion with respect to the greater system; i.e. the > puddle of cum. > > D. Bowers, Ph.D. How exactly does one measure the performance of sperm and then get around to comparing that performance with the molecular structure and performance of water? Surely the best method would be to fill one blokes testicles with real sperm and the other with water and see which of the two contenders manages to fertilize the egg first? As for sperm moving in random directions ... that's crap, they can all spot the chance of a swim in the furry goblet so they all go the same way, hence providing the man's testicles with a swinging forward motion. Obviously if the fish in a lake all moved at once the lake would move as the fish would displace more water if they all went in to a smaller area, granted the ammount changed would be minimal but the fish would cause the water to move!!! Phil Macavity. STD. .