Hello, you've reached Arnold's pizza shop. I'm not here now; I'm out killing pepperoni. If you want to reach me, if you want a pizza, I don't care, because I'm not here. Can't you realize that, idiot?

But, if you need a pizza sometime during the next few days, I can have it delivered to you, or maybe I'll STAPLE it to you.

I don't care what you want on it; every pizza comes with pepperoni, and with 9mm bullets on it. If you don't like it, I don't care cause you'll recieve one anyhow. The only difference is, maybe the 9mm bullets will be in a gun, maybe they'll be on a pizza.

If you don't faq I'll give you good pizza. If you do faq around, I'll take a pepperoni and punch it through your head.

If you want mushrooms, shut up. If you want broccoli, what the hell is broccoli anyway? Shut up with the broccoli. If you want something crazy like a pineapple, I'll kill you.

If you like pepperoni and bullets, you've come to the right place. If not, you're an idiot, you deserve to die. 

So, leave your name, number, serial number, how tall you are, whether you're susceptible to any diseases, and if you (are?), I'll come over, maybe I'll give you a pizza, maybe I'll break off your arm.
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