Subj : [4/7] FYI Fwed advice
To   : All
From : Rachel L. Akers
Date : Tue Mar 20 2001 11:10 pm

>... continued from last post

      FYI Fwed advice: Dealing with a Practicing Christian
                              [4/7]


 Do you  have copies of  the e-mails where  you told her  to stop
 sending you Christian stuff? Use those too. She may try to claim
 that  she "didn't  know" that  you didn't  want the material she
 sent. Use those to prove that  she was told several times not to
 send you material  that is offensive to you.  (If you don't have
 them, you might  ask the computer center to  retrieve them; just
 tell them that you lost some copies of e-mail that you wanted to
 save, and could they get them for you from the server?)

 I'm wondering why this woman hasn't lost her job long since. Are
 you 'out' at work, or is  your paganism still a secret from your
 co-workers?

 >  How do I get into a better place?

 The way I  think you might do that is  by taking action. Look at
 it  this way,  this woman  may *say*  she's acting  in love, but
 she's  not. She's  acting from  fundamentalism and  judgment and
 hatred, and  you have the  right to a  peaceful work environment
 free from harassment. Right now you're not getting that.

 You might  warn her that  you'll complain to  human resources or
 another higher-up if this doesn't stop, but that might backfire.
 You've given her plenty of warning  already, in the form of your
 e-mails and requests for her to cease and desist. At this point,
 I would go  to human resources or some  manager higher than both
 of you,  and present your problem.  This is beyond the  scope of
 what one person can handle.

 Personal story:  Before I realized I  was pagan, I worked  in an
 office where  an essentially useless individual  had been hired.
 She was  earning the same as  me but did about  a quarter of the
 work. She  was flighty, childish, insipid  -- and friendly. Very
 friendly. She was also Foursquare Gospel.

 I took great pains never to  let her know I was Catholic (which,
 at the time,  I was). I think she would  have had a heart attack
 just over  that. I left  that job three  years ago, for  various
 reasons.

 Anyway,  about six  months ago,  I got  a phone  call from  her.
 (Don't ask me how she got my home phone number, I'm not sure I'd
 want to  know.) She wanted me  to go with her  to her church. By
 that time  I had been six  months out into paganism,  and I shut
 that idea down,  but as kindly as I could.  I pulled no punches,
 however;  I used  deliberate hot-button  words like  "witch" and
 explained  to her,  calmly, that  I wasn't  Christian and wasn't
 going to  be, and that  we all have  our own path  to walk (many
 roads,  one destination).  I explained  about my  beliefs in the
 Goddess and  the God, and  how many 'Christian'  traditions have
 their origins  in paganism, and  a lot of  other stuff that  I'm
 sure she both didn't know about and would later convince herself
 wasn't true.

 She was polite, but I could  tell she was shocked. That was fine
 with  me --  after hearing  her prayers  over lunch  at her desk
 (loud prayers)  for over a  year, and having  tracts left on  my
 desk, and numerous other little  violations, I was roundly tired
 of this woman.

 She hung  up, sounding rather  bewildered, and I  knew I'd never
 hear from her again. And to date, I never have.

 Essentially,  I gave  her a  dose of  her own  medicine. Now,  I
 understand you  can't do that, but  you do have recourse,  and I
 would take it. Go to your managers and let them know that you've
 been  harassed by  this woman  for however  long it's been, that
 you've  repeatedly  told  her  that  you  don't  want  and don't
 appreciate the  stuff she's sending  you, and that  this book is
 the last straw.

 As Turtle says, "Stand up, speak out, talk back!"

 Blessings,

 --
 Gryphontamer 

--- Msged/2 4.00
 * Origin: Elfwhere - The POINTy eared POINT (3:640/531.2379)

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