X-Google-Language: ENGLISH,ASCII X-Google-Thread: f996b,76a9fa9b36377cdd X-Google-Attributes: gidf996b,public X-Google-ArrivalTime: 2002-07-28 06:07:32 PST Path: archiver1.google.com!news1.google.com!newsfeed.stanford.edu!sn-xit-05!sn-xit-06!sn-post-01!supernews.com!corp.supernews.com!not-for-mail From: llizard Newsgroups: alt.ascii-art Subject: Re: Nerd Boy, episode 255 Date: Sun, 28 Jul 2002 09:06:23 -0400 Organization: via Internetdirect, Canada; zone 6A (or is it 5b?) Message-ID: Reply-To: llizard@idirct.ca References: X-Newsreader: Forte Agent 1.8/32.548 MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-1 Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit X-Complaints-To: newsabuse@supernews.com Lines: 63 Xref: archiver1.google.com alt.ascii-art:18541 In article , "Joaquim G�ndara" wrote: >"llizard" skrev i meddelandet >news:iuh3ku0hbi4p441b1rtpjoi1opb7jl3fl6@4ax.com >> In article , "Joaquim >> G�ndara" wrote: >> [snip] >> > The only thing you Oh yeah? Fine! >> > ever do is heckle me. I've had enough >> > I've had enough! of -you too-! >> > ,,, ` , >> > '.. OO ~-- >> > .||. <||> ->>- >> > _________ || _________ bb _________ |\ _____ >> > [snip] >> >> This seems so out of character for Mandy. I would have thought her >> response would have been an uncaring "What? Oh... Okay... Bye." >> >> But then perhaps you'd have to revise the third panel as well. > >Hmm, I might be guilty of the age-old "author to audience dialogue" >mistake. I guess I simplified to get the pacing I wanted. However, >your line sounds too much like Mandy feels feeble and defeated. > > The only thing you > ever do is heckle me. > I've had enough! Whatever! > ,,, ` , > '.. OO ~-- > .||. <||> ->>- > _________ || _________ bb _________ |\ _____ > >That might do it, but I'm still not satisfied with it. That certainly wasn't the impression I was aiming for. I was trying for a disinterested sounding "What? Oh..." followed by a cheery sounding "Okay... Bye." (I got that VERY response when after much agonizing, I told someone I was dating that I didn't like the way I was being treated and that we should stop seeing each other.) But as you have pointed out, the tone doesn't come out. How about: The only thing you ever do is heckle me. I've had enough! Works for me... ,,, ` , '.. OO ~.. .||. <||> ->>- _________ || _________ bb _________ |\ _____ Note that in this version, Mandy's eyes are open, showing that she is her usual uncaring self. -- llizard aka ejm >%^7^^^7^^ llizard@idirec+.ca ASCII-art & ASCII-animation www.crosswinds.net/~llizard/ascii-art/ If you are e-mailing and hit the reply button, add an "e" to "idirct"