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From: "Hilton Janfield" <korops@vcn.bc.ca--remote-to-reply>
Subject: Frogstein + Birdstein: The Next Generation
Date: 1997/08/22
Message-ID: <01bcaedf$5a1fba20$c6f89bce@default>
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Okay... post this:

+-----------------------------------------------------------------+
| Frogstein and Birdstein: The Next Generation                    |
|       Meet the Crew!                                            |
|                                                                 |
|  Crew of the Federation Stopship U.S.S. Endocrine, NCC 1071-D.  |
|                                 __     ___                      |
| Captain John-Luck Birdard      ( ">   ('v')  Commanding Officer |
|   French dude, slightly        (> )>  (> <)                     |
|   insane.                       ^ ^    ^ ^                      |
|                                 ___    ___                      |
| Commander Willdo Rideher       / .-)  /_|_\   Executive Officer |
|   Walking hormone. His        (_/o|  (/o o\)                    |
|   hairdo only enforces         | -|   | = |                     |
|   that description.                                             |
|                              __\_/__       __|_                 |
| Lieutenant Commander D4T4 =-|| o o ||-=   /  _||_.   Operations |
|   T4, an annoying D4-model  || `-' ||    [    || `      Officer |
|   human relations android.   ~/~|~\~      ~/~~|                 |
|   Modelled after a TV so that humans would listen to him more.  |
|                                                                 |
|                                      .==    ===                 |
| Lieutenant Commander Georgy LaFrog  (  -)  ( - )       Chief of |
|   The Frog who never gets none.      " "    " "     Engineering |
|                                                                 |
|                              /(      _|_                        |
| Lieutenant Woof             ( ">    ('o')          Helm Officer |
|   (I need to replace this   (= )=   (= =)                       |
|   pic! If anyone has a good  " "     " "                        |
|   F&B-style/sized pic of a wolf or dog or something, e-mail it  |
|   to me!!)                                                      |
|                                                                 |
|                                ((    (\_/)                      |
| Lieutenant Natouchya Bunnyar  ( ">   ('n')    Chief of Security |
|                               () ))  () ()                      |
|                                ' '    " "                       |
|                               __    ___                         |
| Doctor Beaverly Crushher     ( ">  ('m')       Chief of Medical |
|                              (-u)' (u--)                        |
|                               !!    ! !                         |
|                             __    ___                           |
| Winely Crushher            ( ">  ('m')                      Kid |
|                            ( )'  (   )                          |
|                             ^^    ^ ^                           |
|                              __      ___                        |
|                             ( ">    ('v')                       |
| Counselor Doyouwanna Troi   (> )>   (> <)      Ship's Counselor |
|                              )(      ) (                        |
|                                                                 |
|                           ,,       ,,                           |
| Queue                    (@@      (@@)                  Villian |
|   If you don't get the   (/ )/    (/\)                          |
|   joke on the name (you   ^ ^      ^^                           |
|   probably don't..) e-mail me.                                  |
|                                                                 |
+-----------------------------------------------------------------+

+-----------------------------------------------------------------------+
| Frogstein and Birdstein: The Next Generation                          |
|       Encounter At Closepoint (part 1 of 7)                           |
| by Hilton Janfield (mailto:korops@vcn.bc.ca) - August 19, 1997        |
|                                                                       |
|     ,-~~~~~~|--------------.._   Have you ever been on a Galactica    |
|   /'/~^     |_.-----._|  _____`\   /  class stopship, Captain?        |
|  / / 1071-D |         | |____ ~~\\                                    |
| ( (_________|_________|______`\___`\  -- No, Lieutenant, I haven't.   |
|  `\_________________(__HAWKING..--~                                   |
|   (                   || (_)       \                                  |
|    `~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~     Well then, sir, if I may say so, your  |
|                                in for a real treat.                   |
|                                Shuttlecraft Hawking to Endocrine.     |
|                                Request permission to dock.            |
|                                                                       |
|              _,---------------------------._                          |
|             / Over 764 quadtrillion served! \  Endocrine here;        |
|            (_________________________________)  Permission granted,   |
|                /     /   |     |  _\     \       /  Hawking.          |
|               /    /'   _|     |~'  `\    \---...__     Welcome back. |
|              /___/'  _===|_____|======`\___\=========                 |
| ,-----------|   |._/'    |     |..______|   |--'                      |
| (___________| M |__) . . | [v] |        | M |                         |
|     /    /.-|   |       `|     |        |   |                         |
|    '--------|___|- - - _/|_____|        |___|                         |
|             `\   \----'  |_   _|       /   /'                         |
|               `\  \       |_ _|       /  /'                           |
|                 `\_\       |_|       /_/'                             |
|                                                                       |
|  WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS THAT?                                        |
| Theres a huge spaceborne \   ,-~~~~~~|--------------.._               |
| spider attacking my ship!  /'/~^     |_.-----._|  _____`\             |
| And I haven't even had a  / / 1071-D |         | |____ ~~\\           |
| chance to get it into a  ( (_________|_________|______`\___`\         |
| battle and severely       `\_________________(__HAWKING..--~          |
| crippled yet! Lieutenant   (                   || (_)                 |
| Bunnyar, open a channel,    `~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~    \              |
| NOW!    /                                    Umm, sir? That's Earth   |
|        /                                        Station McDonalds.    |
| *ahem* As I was saying, open a can of caviar,        \                |
| Lieutenant. This is a moment to celebrate.          Yech.             |
|                                                                       |
|-------------------------------------------------------to-be-continued-|
|                                                                       |
|  Next time on Frogstein and Birdstein: The Next Generation:           |
|     - Encounter At Closepoint, Part 2 or 7                            |
|  "I, Captain John-Luck Birdard, are hereby ordered to assume command  |
|   of the U.S.S. Endocrine, NCC 1071-D..."                             |
|  "...prepare to leave orbit. Set a course for Deneb IV, warp 3..."    |
|                                                                       |
|-----------------------------------------------------------------------|
| Frogstein and Birdstein are Copyright (c) 1997 Pete Casso             |
+-----------------------------------------------------------------------+

--
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