--


And then there was the time when I sent a mail bomb to Steve:



[...]
> >> :::::: So that's a no then.
> >> :::::
> >> ::::: Not necessarily. Why? Are you Steve in disguise?
> >> ::::
> >> :::: No,Ii am merely mortal.
> >> :::
> >> ::: Steve's not mortal? Does this mean my carefully constructed mail
> >> ::: bomb won't have any effect on him?
> >> ::
> >> :: Course he isn't. He can live forever and the only way you can kill
> >> :: him is by chopping his head off with a big highlander sword.
> >> :
> >> : Sword... hmmm... why couldn't you have told me that before I sent it
> >> : off. I'm not sure he'll fall for the anonymous envelope from Sweden
> >> : trick twice...  :-\
> >>
> >> mheh. I got it today and I cut the red wire.
> >
> >I'm impressed that you got past the hidden mechanical backup detonator
> >with the very sensitive trigger!
> >
> 
> FNAR!

*looks up FNAR*

"For No Apparent Reason"


???

(Yes, there really was a "bomb".

Components:

                Calculator
            _.'  |
 VK      .-' /   V
      __|_.-'  ____    ____
     /-.|     |[__]|  |.-+.|
     @ @/     |789+|  || |||
     \=/      |456-|  |==+=| <-- mouse trap
     _|_      |123=|  | [] |
   /(.X.)     |____|  |____|
   \ |.| \_    .---.
   '( v ) `   /     |  |||||
     |||      |     |  ||||| <-- bits of coloured wire
     |||      |     )  |||||
    '-^-`     `-.__.'
       ^          ^
       |          |
   "Barbie doll"  Bag of balloons


Interpretation:

                Computer detonator (electronic box
                with display and buttons)
            _.'  |
  VK     .-' /   V
      __|_.-'  ____    ____
     /-.|     |[__]|  |.-+.|
     @ @/     |789+|  || |||
     \=/      |456-|  |==+=| <-- Mechanical detonator
     _|_      |123=|  | [] |
   /(.X.)     |____|  |____|
   \ |.| \_    .---.
   '( v ) `   /     |  |||||
     |||      |     |  ||||| <-- coloured wires
     |||      |     )  |||||
    '-^-`     `-.__.'
       ^          ^
       |          |
Bimbo hostage   Explosive stuff that can be blown up


Putting it all together:


1. The mousetrap is hidden behind the calculator (it is the same
   size as the calculator).

            _.'
 VK      .-' /  ____
      __|_.-'  ____ |
     /-.|     |[__]||
     @ @/     |789+||
     \=/      |456-||
     _|_      |123=||
   /(.X.)     |____|
   \ |.| \_    .---.
   '( v ) `   /     |  |||||
     |||      |     |  |||||
     |||      |     )  |||||
    '-^-`     `-.__.'

2. The wires are connected (taped) between the calculator and
   the explosives.


            _.'
  VK     .-' /  ____
      __|_.-'  ____ |
     /-.|     |[__]||
     @ @/     |789+||
     \=/      |456-||
     _|_      |123=||
   /(.X.)     ||||||
   \ |.| \_    |||||
   '( v ) `   /||||||
     |||      |     |
     |||      |     )
    '-^-`     `-.__.'

3. The bimbo hostage is tied up and blindfolded.


            _.'
 VK      .-' /  ____
      __|_.-'  ____ |
     /  |     |[__]||
     ###/     |789+||
     \=/      |456-||
     _|_      |123=||
    (===)     ||||||
    ||=||      |||||
    (===)     /||||||
     |=|      |     |
     |=|      |     )
    '-^-`     `-.__.'

4. The bomb and hostage are attached to a wall/raft/floor/back-
   of-van/boat/... (a piece of cardboard).


    _______ _.'____
VK |     .-' /___  |
   |  __|_.-'___ | |
   | /  |  |[__]|| |
   | ###/  |789+|| |
   | \=/   |456-|| |
   | _|_   |123=|| |
   |(===)  ||||||  |
   |||=||   |||||  |
   |(===)  /|||||| |
   | |=|   |     | |
   | |=|   |     ) |
   |'-^-`  `-.__.' |
   |_______________|

5. The whole thing is put in an envelope and mailed to Steve.