ad88888ba ,ad8888ba, 88 88 888888888888 d8" "8b d8"' `"8b 88 88 ,88 Y8, d8' 88 88 ,88" `Y8aaaaa, 88 88aaaaaaaa88 ,88" `"""""8b, 88 88""""""""88 ,88" `8b Y8, 88 88 ,88" Y8a a8P Y8a. .a8P 88 88 88" "Y88888P"8888`"Y8888Y"'88888ba 8b 88 888888888888 88 `"8b 88 "8b Y8, ,8P 88 `8b 88 ,8P Y8, ,8P 88 88 88aaaaaa8P' "8aa8" 88 88 88""""88' `88' 88 8P 88 `8b 88 88 .a8P 88 `8b 88 88888888Y"' 88 `8b 88 ** a silly figlet logo and a lot of freeverse venting about things you don't care **** #include . if you see your name mentioned here STOP READING IMMEDIATELY. you might *like* what you read and start harassing me in real life causing situations i am not ready to deal with. -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- i've got tears in my eyes and i am not sad the damn flu. this morning i tried to take ravel to hear at the school I CANT HEAR TO RAVEL ANYMORE why the hell i started to hear jazz in the first time? i mean ravel, rachmaninoff the whole bradybunch bring me memories of ______ you know what i mean. it would seem that in jazz, i have some active quality something to do something to live since contemplation seems not to be enough anymore? i just need a way to state it clearly i am not trying to screw hassib. i am trying to communicate and this is not an underground poem damn dalevy i cant even write prose anymore its not safe to write freeverse people think you are trying to write a poem and in poetry, i dont like freeverse too much i want the spirit of the preclassical suite the titles. gigue. chaconne. allemande. zarabande. but i cant hear the damn gaspard de la nuit - how am i supposed to hear to a preclassical suite how am i supposed to write a damn sonnet if i can't even write decent prose i hope people dont start liking what i write i don't want my face in a damn bronze statue it's getting each time more difficult to communicate i speak too fast, people don't understand what i am trying to say yesterday, i couldnt get an ice cream. still pissed off i really needed an icecream. but now i have the flu and that doesnt matter anymore it's getting even difficult to find time to concentrate to write my freeverse rants (and that's the only time i have to vent from heart) i want meaningful dialogue. ultimately, that's what i seek everywhere. marina. hassib. mariana whoever you are, damnit. listen to me. no, better. i talk to much. talk to me let me hear your voice. but, fuck, understand me. MEANINGFUL DIALOGUE. id renounce to sex if i could have meaningful dialogue and a decent ammount of human contact and tenderness every week or so. newline::headline::connection problems this is not a civilized country its raining outside and im having problems to connect. its not a matter of technique brazil telecom (embratel) was sold to the spaniards its not any better than it was when it was the government's NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION oh, bugger. and the damn net is all i have to communicate newline::thecrisis::filmmaking defying everything&everyone who tells me to get into computer science i am going to the filmmaking college i think i have this masochistic urge to starve to death damn. i like to eat. i dont know if you realized but you need around $800,000 to cook up a CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP movie i wonder who would sponsor a film about a schizo hippie locked up in a living room with a thug-ish whitemale. (the script is going on. the whole film is not on the room - it would be theatre they go to a pizza place then they get in a boat) (always the lack of meaning in the core of existence and it's a comedy. quite surreal but its a comedy) "you drank john lennon's grass!" "wasnt it tea?" "no, it was john lennon's grass. john lennon actually step on that grass" "it tasted like herbal tea" but who cares too much porn/semiporn/quarterporn/nonporn movies waiting to be produced the most expensive film produced in brazil in the theatres now is about a girl who gets for her birthday a slave for the weekend now, THAT'S art. there's a media conspiracy for femdom starting with the spicegirls mel gibson, "payback" akashaweb leather clothing on the stores i am an antichrist&a poet (so they say) i dont need a mistress i just need an easier way to lower my testosterone and unload my testicles im getting too rude return to the point here i am. duke ellington quietly massages my brain gone is the time when i used to massage my brain with bach's violin sonatas well. it's still brain massage (have you realized the arrogant british accent everyone assumes when pronouncing "massage"? or it's just seinfeld who says it like that? perhaps because its a french word, whoknows) here i hear. here hear i. and did those feet in ancient times wandered thru england's mountains green but i dont like chinese i like duke ellington & charles mingus & bud powell help me i need help badly i might be spending my whole life writing freeverse -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- The formerly glorious TACV group dissolved like salt in the acid. ligbm and qx4 are too busy getting prepared for their college exams to write. in fact, i should be getting prepared for my college exams too, but. well. i have promised myself to start in august so a few issues might still go up. i haven't found yet a place to archive this but if you got it on a forward, the subscription address is marina-subscribe@onelist.com. have a nice life. mov dx