COACHING NOTES: LIVING ON PURPOSE April 21, 1999 Brought to you by Ann McAllister, Ph.D. (But you can call me Bubba.) Happy spring to everybody! And Happy fall to my subscribers in New Zealand! Being a gardener and birder, spring is my favorite time of year. I have the most energy and feel my best in the spring. And lately I have also been feeling incredible gratitude for my life and all its riches. This is particularly highlighted as I watch what is going on in the Balkans. The many new subscribers to this e-newsletter are something for which I am grateful. I average one new subscriber per day just from your forwarding this newsletter. Thank you so much. I am truly gratified that so many of you find Coaching Notes a meaningful contribution to your lives. ************************************************************************ TABLE OF CONTENTS 1. You, Inc. 2. Free Coaching Opportunity 3. Humor 4. www.AnnMcAllister.com 5. Resources 6. Words of Wisdom 7. Shameless Marketing ************************************************************************** YOU, INC. One of the facts of life in today's corporate world is job instability. The corporate environment is constantly changing and employees are being reorganized and downsized willy nilly. Virtually all of my clients who work in corporate settings spend a fair amount of time exploring how to meet this challenge. Rather than becoming demoralized and just reacting to this constant change, they want to learn how to be proactive. They want to learn how to thrive and prosper in a constantly changing and sometimes chaotic work environment. I wish I could take credit for the title of this article. I read it somewhere but can't recall where. My apologies to whomever originated it. (Do any of you know?) I use it because, in two short words, it clearly expresses the strategy necessary for today's employees to be in charge of their careers. And it is the framework I use in coaching my clients with this challenge. You, Inc. means thinking of yourself as your own business. You are self-employed. Your employer is your client or customer, and you start operating like any successful business owner. This shift in perspective is quite powerful because you are no longer passively waiting for your employer to chart your career path. How does this work? First you must decide what you are in business to do. The best ways to do that are determining: (1) your mission for you life, (2) what your gifts and talents are, and (3) which of those you really enjoy using. Once you know what business you are in and have the appropriate preparation and training, you begin seeking customers or clients. Is the right customer for you already where you work, or should you be looking elsewhere? A good match is a company (1) whose values and goals are in alignment with your values and goals, (2) they are buying what you are selling, and (3) they accept or support the way you work best. Don't try to change yourself to fit the customer. That's a sure road to misery and failure. Stay true to who you are. Once you have your client, you will work to retain that client by delivering excellent work and adding value in ways the company didn't even know it wanted. You will demonstrate leadership and going the extra mile. Always be sure to under-promise and over-deliver. You also should be working on improving your emotional intelligence quotient. Emotional intelligence consists of five factors: 1. Self-awareness 2. Self-regulation 3. Motivation 4. Empathy 5. Social skills Daniel Goleman in his ground breaking book, Working with Emotional Intelligence, demonstrates that, given the same technical skills, the factors that determine to what extent people succeed in their careers are those five emotional competencies listed above. And these are all coachable competencies because they can be learned. Learn and practice excellent management skills with the employees of You, Inc. (the staff you supervise). Those folks will be a major determinant of your success. Learn to coach them to achieve their best. Strong emotional competencies will serve you well in being an inspiring leader to your staff. Like any business that wants to be self-sustaining, you will need to attract new customers. And you may need to do that quickly. Network, network, network both within and outside your company. Be as genuinely helpful to as many people and organizations as you can. Form strategic alliances within the company and, perhaps, outside of it. Be active in your professional and trade organizations. Have the ability to change or increase your customer base anytime you want. Finally, and just as important as any of the other guidelines, make sure you have balance in your life. Being only You, Inc. will result in burnout and alienation. To be truly your best leave space in your life to be several of these: a parent, a spiritual person, a spouse or partner, a community activist, an artist, a child, a friend, a volunteer, an athlete, a sister or brother, an entertainer… Follow these guidelines and You, Inc. will be spectacularly successful. ************************************************************************** FREE COACHING OPPORTUNITY Would you like some coaching to become You, Inc.? Just call me on Monday, April 26 between 8 and 9:30PM EDT, and I will coach you on surviving and thriving in today's corporate environment. Call me at 770-399-6619. If I am talking to someone else and you aren't able to get through at that time, please leave a message. I will call you back to schedule a time that is convenient for both of us. ************************************************************************* HUMOR (Groan) On a Transatlantic flight, a plane passes through a severe storm. The turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when a wing is struck by lightning. One woman in particular loses it. Screaming, she stands up in the front of the plane. "I'm too young to die!" she wails. Is there ANYONE on this plane who can make me feel like a WOMAN before I die??" For a moment there is silence. Everyone has forgotten their own peril, and they all stare, riveted, at the desperate woman in the front of the plane. Then, a man stands up in the rear of the plane. "I can make you feel like a woman," he says. He's gorgeous. Tall, built, with long, flowing black hair and jet black eyes. No one moves. He starts to walk slowly up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt one button at a time. The woman is breathing heavily in anticipation as the strange man approaches. He removes his shirt. Muscles ripple across his chest as he reaches her, and extends the arm holding his shirt to the trembling woman, and whispers: "Iron this." **************************************************************************** IT'S HERE FINALLY…www.AnnMcAllister.com I have done it! I have a web site. I am truly of the cyber age. The site is in its infancy. I want it to be a very useful and fun place for people who are seeking excellence in their lives. The site will grow and evolve. And I make a commitment to you and myself that there will never be outdated information at the site. (This is a pet peeve of mine.) Please visit it and tell me what you would like to see there. What could I add that would be of use to you in all your endeavors? Really. I do want your feedback. ************************************************************************ RESOURCES Do you have difficulty getting organized despite you best efforts? Conquering Chronic Disorganization is a wonderfully entertaining and useful new book written by my friend Judith Kolberg. Judith is a professional organizer and Director of the National Study Group on Chronic Disorganization. You can order this book for $13.00 plus $2.50 handling by sending a check to Squall Press, Inc., PO Box 691, Decatur, GA 30031. Make checks payable to Judith Kolberg. I have read most of this book, and it is wonderful. It helps you think outside the box (ha, ha) for creative solutions to your organizational challenges. Judith can be contacted at 404-289-1622. ************************************** Is the web becoming more and more a part of your life? Check out this newsletter. FREE COOL-SITES NEWSLETTER! You are cordially invited to subscribe to the FREE newsletter: "Rob's wURLd | Best of the Web"! It is a weekly letter featuring family-friendly "Best of the Web" and "Cool-Site" selections for ALL ages! You may subscribe for FREE at: http://RobswURLd.listbot.com/ -On The Web- OR: mailto: RobswURLd-subscribe@listbot.com {Past issues are archived at the subscription site} ************************************************************************* WORDS OF WISDOM I've learned- that sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up. I've learned- that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel. I've learned- that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love. I've learned- that just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have. I've learned- that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated. -Source Unknown **************************************************************************** SHAMELESS MARKETING Do you want to achieve excellence? Great athletes have coaches. Great musicians have teachers. Great leaders have advisors. Isn't YOUR life just as important? For a complimentary introductory session to see if coaching is for you, call me at 770-399-6619 or email me at CoachAMcA@aol.com. I am available for individual and group coaching. Who is Ann McAllister, Ph.D., you ask? Well, she has been helping people achieve the lives they really, really want for 26 years as a psychologist and more recently as a Success Coach. She is a member of the International Coach Federation and the Coach Training Program of Coach University. Ann works with professionals, executives, and business owners to achieve personal and professional excellence and still have fun in the process. Ann considers herself a recovering psychologist. When she is not "working," you can often find her strolling through her estate (a small perennial garden) admiring the beauty of nature. She is often followed by a herd of cats. ************************************************************************** Coaching Notes: Living on Purpose appears twice monthly. I welcome submissions from all of you for the newsletter, suggestions on what you would like to see in it, constructive criticism on what you don't like about it, and even messages to unsubscribe because you don't find it useful. Please feel free to distribute this newsletter in its entirety (including copyright) to anyone you think might enjoy it. GIVE YOUR FRIENDS, FAMILY AND COLLEAGUES A GIFT! To subscribe, send an email to CoachAMcA@aol.com with "subscribe" in the body of the email. To unsubscribe, just type in "unsubscribe." This subscription mailing list is completely confidential and will not be sold or released to anyone. Copyright 1999 Ann McAllister, Ph.D. All rights reserved. Permission is granted to reproduce, copy or distribute Coaching Notes: Living on Purpose so long as this copyright notice and full information about contacting the author is attached. Ann McAllister, Ph.D., can be contacted at CoachAMcA@aol.com or 770-399-6619. http://www.AnnMcAllister.com