Excerpts from "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Magi: Our world was much younger then. The forest went on forever. We tree spirits nurtured the harmony of all living things, but out closest friends were humans. Then, as sometimes happens, the balance of nature shifted, and Hexxus, the very spirit of destruction, rose up from the bowels of the earth and rained down his poison. The forest was nearly destroyed. Many lives were lost, and the humans fled in fear, never to return. Most think they didn't survive. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Magi: It was only by calling up the magical powers of nature that I was able to trap Hexxus inside an enchanted tree, and save FernGully. [To Crysta] Which is why it is so important for you to learn to use these powers. I won't be around forever, and you have to - Crysta! Crysta: . . . Yes. Magi: That is why it is so important for you to learn the secrets of - Crysta! Crysta: Magi . . . Yes! The secrets. I know, ahh . . . but I mean, it's all right now. That was so long ago and you trapped him in that tree an' everything, so I - I . . . really have to go now, but I'll see you later, O.K.? Bye! - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Cassowary 1: Halt! Who goes there! Cassowary 2: Hi, Crysta. Cassowary 1: O.K., what's the password? Crysta: Oh, come on, you guys. Cassowary 1: Is that the password? Cassowary 2: Sounds good. Crysta: Bye! Cassowary 2: "Bye"! That's it! That's the password! Cassowary 1: I don't know if that's the password or not, I'm so confused you f- - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta: Magi? Magi? Oh Magi! I just saw the most incredible thing above the canopy. A whole other world - the sky went on forever, and way over in the distance as far as I could see, there was this enormous rock, like a - . . . Magi: Mountain. That was Mount Warning. Crysta: And next to it was a - a - I don't know. It looked like a strange black cloud rising out of the earth. Magi: Smoke. I should think. Crysta: What's smoke? Magi: Oh, there are many things in our world you don't yet know about, Crysta. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta: I was thinking about that smoke. Do you think it could be - Hexxus? Magi: No, there isn't a force in nature that could release him, and there are no poisons here on which he can feed. Hexxus is trapped - for all time. Now, that's enough for today. Crysta: But what could've caused the smoke? Magi: Now, now, now, off you go. Crysta: But Magi - - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: Oh, noooooooooo! [Thud] Red light. [Thud] Red light again. Immedi- ate clearance! Request immediate clearance! Oh, noooooooooo! [Thud] - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta: Bless your heart with magic light, I give the gift of fairy sight! Batty: Ahhhhh. . . . Oh, what a strange li'l bug. Crysta: I did it! I did it! Batty: Oh - gravity works. [Long silence followed by yet another thud] - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: Hello, I'm a nocturnal placental flying mammal. A member of the family pteropodidae - or pteropodidn'tae - heh - if you can't tell, I'm a BAT! Heh heh heh - yes I am, and they used to call me Batty. Batty Koda. Nice to meet you - bonjour. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta's Father: And where are you from? Batty: I just blew in from a biology lab! I'm back and I'm flappin'! Flappin' free! Lemme tell you a story and it's all about - [abruptly Batty emits a wide range of sound effects, culminating in the first bar of Bach's Toccata in D minor] - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: Yo! The name is Batty The logic is erratic Potato in a jacket Toys in the attic I rock and I ramble My brain is scrambled Rap like an animal But I'm a mammal "All of our cosmetics are non-carcinogenic" - "Batty Rap", From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: I've been brain-fried, electrified 'Fected and injectified Vivisectified And fed pesticide My face is all cut up 'Cause my radar's all shut up Nurse! I need a check-up from the neck up I'm Batty! "It seems to have no effect, doctor" "Get me another one. Get me another animal!" - "Batty Rap", From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: They used and abused me Battered and bruised me Red wires, green wires Stuck 'em right through me So hear my very words And exercise a little prudence When dealing with - humans. Crysta: Humans?! Batty: WHERE!? No! No! No! No! No see. Crysta: No, no, there're no humans Elder 1: They're long gone. Elder 2: Vanished. Elder 3: Definitely extinct. Crysta's father: They only exist in stories. - "Batty Rap", From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: It's been nice, but I gotta hoon. Adios, amigos! Bing! Check please! Crysta: Oh, father, do you think it's possible? Could humans still exist? Crysta's father: Now, Crysta, don't you think you're a little old to believe in human tales? Batty: Human tails? Humans don't have tails - they have big, big bottoms that they wear with bad shorts. They walk around going, "Hi, Helen!" - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta: did you really see humans? Were they at Mount Warning? Batty: Oh, masses of Homo Sapiens. . . . Hey! Where are you going? - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: Yeahhhh . . . this territory looks kinda familiar. . . . Fabulous day in the canopy, isn't it? Ha ha . . . oh, where d'ya think you're goin'? Crysta: Mount Warning. [Thud] Batty: I know where I am. I know where I am. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: Hey! You scared me there. For a minute I thought you said you were going to Mount Warning. Crysta: Well, I did. Batty: But there are humans on Mount Warning! Crysta: Exactly. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: Fractured figs, fairy bug! Come on! Mount Warning is the last place in the world a little bug like you wants to go. [Batty points to the antenna embedded in his skull] Look at these! D'ya think nature did this? D'ya think I put this in to get better reception? No! humans did this. We should stay here. It's nice here. Come on, you gotta great set of wings. Let's just flutter for a while. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta: Batty? Batty! Well, come on! Batty: My heart! Oh, my heart! I can't go on. Help me, my little wings can't make it. Crysta: Mmm, maybe you should wait here for me. Batty: This is a fabulous idea, I really think we should fly with that, only - why don't you stay here with me? Crysta: It's O.K., really, I'll be right back. Batty: Why - do I not believe you? - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta: Look out! Bless your eyes with magic light, I give the gift of fairy size - uh - sight! - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: Lift! I need lift! - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: Don't go, I said. Bad idea, I said. But would you listen? Noooo, don't listen to Batty, mm-mmmm. Well, what have we here? Shoes! Animals don't wear shoes. . . . A HUMAN! Crysta: A TREE! [Thud] - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Zak: What is going on here? Crysta: The monster. It tried to eat you. Zak: Monster? Crysta: My friend and I saved you. Oh, Batty. Batty? - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: Oh, sonic interference. What a nightmare. I thought I saw a human. Aaaaaaaaaa! Human! [Thud] Crysta: That's a human? Batty: Yes, yes! Kill it! Restrain it! Medicate it! Something! Ffffffff- fffff . . . puff up, puff up. . . (they hate that). . . - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Zak: Back off! Back off! Get back. Don't worry! Crysta: Stop! Zak: I've got it scared. Batty: I have but one claw, but beware. Crysta: Will you both just calm down? Batty and Zak [in unison]: [To Crysta] He tried to kill you! [To each other] I did not! You did! Crysta: Hold on! The only thing that tried to kill anybody was that horrible monster in the forest Zak: Monster! What Monster? Crysta: The one that ate the tree. It was terrible. Zak: Tree? The leveller. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Zak: Hey. Am I - d-dead? Crysta: No. Batty: We could fix that for you . . . Zak: Then I must be dreaming. Crysta: Nope. Zak: Oh, sure. And, what are you supposed to be? Some kind of fairy? Crysta: Of course I am. What about you? Are you really a human? Zak: Last time I checked. Listen, fairy, it's been weird, but I'm outta here. This dream is history. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Goanna: Check this out. I've a basic inclination A very primal need To inspect the vegetation For an egg or centipede I just can't control this hunger I just can't seem to cut it back On my ravenous consumption You're a welcome little snack - "If I'm Goanna Eat Somebody", From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Goanna: If I'm gonna eat somebody It might as well be you I can see you as a sandwich Or a strange exotic stew - "If I'm Goanna Eat Somebody", From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Goanna: Welcome to the food chain. [He swallows Zak] Crysta: No! You can't eat him. He's a human! Goanna: Mwhath's a humanhh? Batty: Delicious and nutritious, tastes just like chicken. Crysta: Wait! He's my friend. Goanna: Any friend of a fairy [He spits Zak across the canopy] is a friend of mine. Crysta: Thanks a lot . . . Goanna: Oh, man, you owe me a free dinner after this one. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta: Are you O.K.? Zak: Aaaaaaaa! What happened to me? I'm under three inches tall! Crysta: Oh. I shrank you. Zak: What? Crysta: It was the most amazing thing. . . . 'Course, it's not what the spell's really supposed to do - Zak: What? Crysta: But Magi Lune will fix you - Zak: You - you SHRANK me? Crysta: Yeah . . . Batty: Catches on quick, doesn't he? - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta: We'd better buzz off; it's getting late. Zak: Buzz off? I'm not buzzing anywhere. Now, unshrink me, and I mean NOW! Crysta: Well, I guess I could take a bash at it . . . Zak: "Take a bash"? Crysta: Actually, I'm just sort of learning - Zak: Great! I've been shrunk by an amateur! I don't believe this. O.K., O.K., come on, bash away. Crysta: O.K. . . . What was done, now undo, return you to the form that's true. [Parts of Zak grow to full size, but not all the same time.] Batty: Oh oh oh oh . .. Big ears - elephant! No-o-oh oh oh anteater! Oh oh - orangutan! Ok, ok, ok, ok, lemme guess. A duck! A duck! Ooooohhh, it's Darwin's grab bag! - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta: Uh - let me try again. Batty: Yes yes yes! Zak: No no no! Thank you, but I think maybe we'd better go see this Magi. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Zak: [Holds out his hand] I'm Zak. Crysta: [Sees Zak's hand and holds out hers, nowhere near his] I'm Crysta. [She walks off] Zak: [Turns his outstretched arm into a bow of sorts] Nice to meet you. Crysta: You're going to love FernGully. It's the most beautiful, wonderful place in the forest. Well, come on . . . Batty can carry you. Batty: Moi? Uh-uh - not this little mammal. Fly a human? I'd rather suck wax fruit. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Ralph: Hey, Ton'. Tony: What? Ralph: You see Zak anywhere? Tony: No, his shift's about over. He probably cut out early. Ralph: That's the problem with the world today - people are lazy - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Ralph: Hey Ton'. Y-You think the leveller can handle this baby? Tony: Sure, the leveller eats everything. Ralph: Kinda like you? Tony: How any times a day I gotta threaten your life? - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta: I've got so many things I want to ask you. Like - why have humans returned to the forest? And what was that monster that tried to eat you? Zak: That wasn't a monster. It was a machine. Crysta: What's a - "machine"? Zak: It's a . . . a thing - cutting down trees. Crysta: That's terrible. Zak: Only if you live in a tree. Crysta: I DO live in a tree. Zak: Oh. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta: You didn't have anything to do with that - machine, did you? Zak: Oh, wha- me? No. No, no, no, of course not. How could have anything to do with something that eats trees? Crysta: Could it come to FernGully? Zak: Oh, no, no, of course not. You've got nothing to worry about. Crysta: Why? Zak: Because . . . um . . . it's - trapped! Crysta: Oh, I know. By those red marks. It can't go past them, well, it must be magic! Zak: Yeah . . . you know, you're pretty smart, fairy. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Hexxus: Mmmmmmm . . . Delicious. A first class smoke. Mother's milk. What is this delightful thing? And how did I get out of that tree? Of course . . . humans. What wonderful creatures. So clever, so helpful. I must take this wonderful human thing to - FernGully. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Hexxus [Over intercom]: New orders, boys. You're going to FernGully. And I want you there by morning. Tony: By morning? Oh, I don't know if we can do that. Hexxus: You'll just have to work harder, then. Double shifts, no breaks. Tony: No breaks? Hexxus: And make sure ya got plenty of oil. Tony: Roger that. We'll give it a gas. Ralph: Hey, Ton'. You know what this means? Tony: Yeah. Heh heh. Buku overtime, heh heh heh. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Hexxus: Mmmmmm, what a miraculous device. Ha ha ha! I'm really getting the hang of this, hm hm. I do believe we a destined to be soul mates. . . . - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Hexxus: Hit me once Hit me twice Oooooooohhhh That's rather nice Oil and grime Poison sludge Diesel clouds and noxious muck Slime beneath me Slime up above Oooh, you'll love my Toxic love - "Toxic Love", From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Hexxus: I see the world And all the creatures in it I suck 'em dry and spit 'em out like spinach 'Cause greedy human beings Will always lend a hand With the destruction Of this worthless jungle land And what a beautiful machine they have provided To slice a path of doom With my sweet breath to guide it - "Toxic Love", From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Hexxus: Filthy brown Acid rain Pouring down like egg chow mein Slime beneath me Slime up above Oooh, you'll love my Toxic love - "Toxic Love", From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Zak: This is so incredible! Crysta: What are the trees like where you live? Zak: Not like this - I live in a city. Crysta: "Siddy"? Zak: Yeah - buildings - traffic - roads - lights - a city. Most humans live in cities. There's not many trees there. Crysta: But how can you live without trees? Zak: Easy! Crysta: But trees give life. They make the clouds, the rain, the air - Zak: Oh, we've got air. Batty: Yeah . . . if you don't mind getting all your minerals in one breath. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta: Don't you miss talking to the forest? Zak: Can't say I've actually talked with the forest before. Crysta: I do, all the time. Zak: Uh huh . . . what does it say? Crysta: Well, listen. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Zak: So - so what about you, Cryst'? I mean, what do you fairies do, anyway? Crysta: Do? Zak: Yeah, I mean, do you have jobs or anything? Crysta: What - what's a - job? Zak: Guess that answers that question. Look - what do you do all day? Crysta: Mmmm, help things grow. Zak: Yeah? That sounds cool. Crysta: No - usually it's warm Zak: No, no. Cool means hot. Crysta: What? Zak: Yeah! You know, bodacious, bad, tubular . . . Batty: Awesome use of the language, dude. Zak: As in, "You are one bodacious babe." Crysta: And that's good - I mean cool? Zak: Yeah. We're communicating now. Crysta: Tubular. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Zak: Morning! [He is busily working on a tree with his pocket knife.] Crysta: What are you doing? Zak: Carving your name. See? C, R, Y, S - Crysta: No, no, you mustn't do that. Here. can't you feel its pain? Zak: Its pain!? Crysta: Yes. Batty: Humans can't feel anything. They're numb from the brain down. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: Oh, noooooooooo! [Thud] [He gets up, wings covering his face, includ- ing his eyes] I'm blind! Oh, no. [He moves his wings ever so slightly] I can see, it's a miracle! Another perfect landing. No worries, I'm O.K. Thank you for caring. It's just a few bruises . . . nobody cares about me. Zak: I do, batman. Batty: You sure? Zak: I'm positive. Batty: Only fools are positive. Zak: Are you sure? Batty: I'm positive. I FELL for it! I should've known. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta's Father: Crysta! We were so worried about you - what's that? Crysta: Father - I'd like you to meet Zak Zak: Hi! Crysta: He's a bodacious babe! Crysta's Father: A what? Crysta: He's a human! Crysta's Father: Somehow I thought they'd be - . . . bigger. Crysta: Well, I had a little accident, and he sort of shrank. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta: But just think - humans! Back in the forest! Batty: Yep. There goes the neighborhood. Crysta: Be nice, Batty. Batty: First thing: all these trees go. Then come your highways. Then come your shopping malls, and your parking lots, and your convenience stores, and then come - [Zak flicks Batty's antenna] Price check on prune juice, Bob! Price check on prune juice. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Pips: Crysta. Where've you been? I've been looking all over for you. Crysta: Pips, you won't believe what I've found. [She indicates Zak] Isn't he amazing? Zak: Shouldn't we be charging admission for this? Pips: That's all you got to say? I've been out all night and you wanna show me this weird creature? Crysta: This "weird creature" as a human! Pips: Hmmmmmm. . . . He's kinda small, ain't he? - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Pips: Hey! What's goin' on, Zak? Zak: What're you talking about? Pips: You know exactly what I'm talking about. The forest! You know what's happening, don't you? Crysta's Father: Good idea - ask the human. He may know. Zak: Crysta - Crysta: You LIED to me! - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Zak: I wish - I wish the human tales were true. They're not here to protect the forest. They're cutting down trees. They're destroying the forest. And I was helping them do it. Batty was right. Batty: I was? Zak: They're coming this way. You can't stop them. You'll have to leave. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: You know, Zak, truth doesn't always win friends, but it certainly influences people. You're not half bad for a hominid. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Magi: Since the beginning of time, we have been the guardians and the healers of the forest. We have too long forgotten the magic powers of nature. The time has come to call on them again. Remember - all the magic of creation exists within a single tiny seed. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Magi: Look for the hero inside yourself, Crysta. Look to the good and loving heart in you and all others. For just as every seed holds the power and magic of creation, so too do you - and every other creature in this world. Crysta: Magi, don't leave me. Magi: I love you - I'll always be with you. We all have a power - and it grows when it is shared. Remember what you've learned, Crysta. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: This is the last time I save you, human. Zak: No! No, Batty, take me back to the leveller! Batty: Are you crazy? That's lemming talk! - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: Oh, Caesar, emperor of Rome. [zzzt] Well, all right, Gummi, we're goin' to war. [zzzt] Fasten your seat belts, it's gonna be a bumpy night. [zzzt] We're goin' in full throttle; that oughtta keep those rebel fighters off our tail. [zzzt] Rock and roll, gentlemen! Time to rock and roll! [zzzt] Bogey, bogey, bogey at three o'clock, red leader, red leader. [zzzt] Aye aye, cap'n - I can't get enough speed, we got no dilithium crystal! - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Batty: Oh, no, this is gonna hurt. Oh, Nooooooooooo! - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Hexxus: Should have sprayed for pests. Ha ha ha ha ha. Mmmmm . . . lovely wings - so easily detached. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Crysta: We did it, Zak. Now Hexxus can never harm Fern Gully again. Zak: But humans still could. That's why I have to go back. There's a part of me that really wants to stay. Crysta: There's a part of you that will always stay. Remember, Zak, Remember everything. - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %% Zak: Oh. Batty. [He picks up the unconscious Batty and lightly touches his head, knocking the antenna and waking him.] Batty: [seeing Zak grown to normal size again] I've shrunk! - From "FernGully: The Last Rainforest" %%